Same story again pt2 - 02/27/21 03:35 PM
Re: Same story again pt2 - 02/28/21 06:06 AM
I think that everybody who needs cheering up should read the below link to MLC for dummies its brilliant and will brighten up your day?
https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=588545#Post588545
https:/
Re: Same story again pt2 - 03/01/21 09:37 AM
Had a text from WW last night asking me how am i and would i like to meet her to talk? she is still with the PA! so i am assuming this is the temperature check that is spoken about on these boards? i am not falling for it and told her no not yet. i am happier without her on the scene.
Re: Same story again pt2 - 03/01/21 10:18 AM
M,
I would of waited a day and the said there is nothing to talk about.
I would of waited a day and the said there is nothing to talk about.
Re: Same story again pt2 - 03/01/21 10:55 AM
Yep! It's a temp check.
Re: Same story again pt2 - 03/01/21 02:42 PM
Good job, Mark. I would have jumped all over that breadcrumb in that point of my sitch!
Re: Same story again pt2 - 03/01/21 02:52 PM
Temp check. Good job not jumping all over it while she's still in the PA.
Re: Same story again pt2 - 03/05/21 02:01 PM
Feeling low today - i have had no contact with her and don't want any? so why am i feeling low about my sitch?
i have had a really good 2 weeks! happy and GAL with walking and talking to fellow walkers with dogs!
i have had a really good 2 weeks! happy and GAL with walking and talking to fellow walkers with dogs!
Re: Same story again pt2 - 03/05/21 02:35 PM
M,
You will have ups and downs for awhile. Just know it’s normal and part of the process.
You will have ups and downs for awhile. Just know it’s normal and part of the process.
Re: Same story again pt2 - 03/05/21 03:34 PM
Originally Posted by markw
Feeling low today - i have had no contact with her and don't want any? so why am i feeling low about my sitch?
i have had a really good 2 weeks! happy and GAL with walking and talking to fellow walkers with dogs!
i have had a really good 2 weeks! happy and GAL with walking and talking to fellow walkers with dogs!
It is the lack of control. It would be a completely different feeling if you knew "If I say X and/or do Y, she will come running back to me!" But you are no contact only because that is what is best for you and your sitch, not because it is what you want. You will always struggle in life when you have to choose between worse or "worser".
But yes, the roller-coaster ride of emotion is real. The best way through it is to focus on what you can control: you. The LBSs we see struggle the most, sit and stew on their sitch the most. The LBSs we see thrive through their sitches are the ones that are out GAL, are out working on themselves. This is why we emphasize things like GAL. Always be busy. Do not sit and stew in your situation. We had a LBH here who was terrible GAL. Full of excuses. I don't have enough friends. I don't have enough money. I don't have the energy. He wanted to come home from work, and sit and talk to his brother and sister-in-law all night about his situation. And it took him MONTHS to move forward. Don't make the same mistake.
Re: Same story again pt2 - 03/21/21 08:50 AM
Update
my WW is now trying to get to me via my D as i have ignored any texts and e-mails from her!
my D constantly comes home from being with her mum, armed with stuff that her M is saying.
it is annoying my D and i keep saying to D that she is spewing and non of it is true!
i am thinking of sending a text to my WW to stop doing it - but i don't want contact or the interaction.
Help
my WW is now trying to get to me via my D as i have ignored any texts and e-mails from her!
my D constantly comes home from being with her mum, armed with stuff that her M is saying.
it is annoying my D and i keep saying to D that she is spewing and non of it is true!
i am thinking of sending a text to my WW to stop doing it - but i don't want contact or the interaction.
Help
Re: Same story again pt2 - 03/21/21 10:15 AM
No you should absolutely send that text politely asking her to not put daughter in the middle.
Re: Same story again pt2 - 03/21/21 12:33 PM
Quote
Update
my WW is now trying to get to me via my D as i have ignored any texts and e-mails from her!
my D constantly comes home from being with her mum, armed with stuff that her M is saying.
it is annoying my D and i keep saying to D that she is spewing and non of it is true!
i am thinking of sending a text to my WW to stop doing it - but i don't want contact or the interaction.
Help
my WW is now trying to get to me via my D as i have ignored any texts and e-mails from her!
my D constantly comes home from being with her mum, armed with stuff that her M is saying.
it is annoying my D and i keep saying to D that she is spewing and non of it is true!
i am thinking of sending a text to my WW to stop doing it - but i don't want contact or the interaction.
Help
This is what WW's do to keep the LBH attached. Some LBH's do it, too. They'll use the kids as their avenue to talk to WW. Once she sees she gets zero response, she will either back off or find another avenue. Either way.......you stay in charge of you.
Re: Same story again pt2 - 03/23/21 07:04 AM
The WW anger at me via my D apparently is that i didn't write all our names in Xmas cards sent to people - just mine and D and this has stressed her out because she has had to explain why we are not together!
Re: Same story again pt2 - 03/23/21 08:11 AM
Quote
The WW anger at me via my D apparently is that i didn't write all our names in Xmas cards sent to people - just mine and D and this has stressed her out because she has had to explain why we are not together!
Typical. Doesn’t want to be with you and ended your relationship, but doesn’t want it to be her fault or to be accountable to her friends/family.
Don’t engage, it’s not your problem to solve. She’s just going to have to learn to lay down in this bed she has made.
Re: Same story again pt2 - 03/23/21 02:05 PM
Originally Posted by markw
The WW anger at me via my D apparently is that i didn't write all our names in Xmas cards sent to people - just mine and D and this has stressed her out because she has had to explain why we are not together!
That is not your problem, it is hers. I hope you do not feel guilt over this.
Re: Same story again pt2 - 03/23/21 03:07 PM
Originally Posted by SteveLW
Originally Posted by markw
The WW anger at me via my D apparently is that i didn't write all our names in Xmas cards sent to people - just mine and D and this has stressed her out because she has had to explain why we are not together!
That is not your problem, it is hers. I hope you do not feel guilt over this.
Not one bit - I laughed when D told me! never realised it was that easy to get under her skin.
Re: Same story again pt2 - 03/23/21 03:46 PM
You will get under her skin even more by just enjoying your life.
Make the most of what you have been given.
I think it was Sandi who once posted.. The WW mindset is a total rollercoaster, as although they are acting on emotion, they are have fear.. They do not think about consequences, but when confronted with them ( ie no names of Christmas cards and people asking questions ) they panic and react - ie in your case, complaining to D..
Ironically, ive just spotted BD date on your sig.. Mine is exactly 2 years prior to you - 8th December 2018
Make the most of what you have been given.
I think it was Sandi who once posted.. The WW mindset is a total rollercoaster, as although they are acting on emotion, they are have fear.. They do not think about consequences, but when confronted with them ( ie no names of Christmas cards and people asking questions ) they panic and react - ie in your case, complaining to D..
Ironically, ive just spotted BD date on your sig.. Mine is exactly 2 years prior to you - 8th December 2018
Re: Same story again pt2 - 03/23/21 03:59 PM
Originally Posted by MrBrside
You will get under her skin even more by just enjoying your life.
Make the most of what you have been given.
I think it was Sandi who once posted.. The WW mindset is a total rollercoaster, as although they are acting on emotion, they are have fear.. They do not think about consequences, but when confronted with them ( ie no names of Christmas cards and people asking questions ) they panic and react - ie in your case, complaining to D..
Ironically, ive just spotted BD date on your sig.. Mine is exactly 2 years prior to you - 8th December 2018
Make the most of what you have been given.
I think it was Sandi who once posted.. The WW mindset is a total rollercoaster, as although they are acting on emotion, they are have fear.. They do not think about consequences, but when confronted with them ( ie no names of Christmas cards and people asking questions ) they panic and react - ie in your case, complaining to D..
Ironically, ive just spotted BD date on your sig.. Mine is exactly 2 years prior to you - 8th December 2018
Also, she would have been irritated if mark HAD included her name on the Christmas cards! With WWs there is no winning.
Re: Same story again pt2 - 03/23/21 04:03 PM
Originally Posted by MrBrside
You will get under her skin even more by just enjoying your life.
Make the most of what you have been given.
I think it was Sandi who once posted.. The WW mindset is a total rollercoaster, as although they are acting on emotion, they are have fear.. They do not think about consequences, but when confronted with them ( ie no names of Christmas cards and people asking questions ) they panic and react - ie in your case, complaining to D..
Ironically, ive just spotted BD date on your sig.. Mine is exactly 2 years prior to you - 8th December 2018
Make the most of what you have been given.
I think it was Sandi who once posted.. The WW mindset is a total rollercoaster, as although they are acting on emotion, they are have fear.. They do not think about consequences, but when confronted with them ( ie no names of Christmas cards and people asking questions ) they panic and react - ie in your case, complaining to D..
Ironically, ive just spotted BD date on your sig.. Mine is exactly 2 years prior to you - 8th December 2018
yes day after D 16th Birthday - nice gift for her?
ironically i am feeling really good at the moment and long may it continue!
how long did it take for you start feeling good about yourself?
Re: Same story again pt2 - 03/23/21 04:11 PM
Originally Posted by markw
Originally Posted by MrBrside
You will get under her skin even more by just enjoying your life.
Make the most of what you have been given.
I think it was Sandi who once posted.. The WW mindset is a total rollercoaster, as although they are acting on emotion, they are have fear.. They do not think about consequences, but when confronted with them ( ie no names of Christmas cards and people asking questions ) they panic and react - ie in your case, complaining to D..
Ironically, ive just spotted BD date on your sig.. Mine is exactly 2 years prior to you - 8th December 2018
Make the most of what you have been given.
I think it was Sandi who once posted.. The WW mindset is a total rollercoaster, as although they are acting on emotion, they are have fear.. They do not think about consequences, but when confronted with them ( ie no names of Christmas cards and people asking questions ) they panic and react - ie in your case, complaining to D..
Ironically, ive just spotted BD date on your sig.. Mine is exactly 2 years prior to you - 8th December 2018
yes day after D 16th Birthday - nice gift for her?
ironically i am feeling really good at the moment and long may it continue!
how long did it take for you start feeling good about yourself?
It happens as soon as you decide. You create your own energy.
Re: Same story again pt2 - 03/23/21 05:14 PM
markw,
It's so difficult to understand what's going on in their minds, or even realize they may be just as confused and spinning themselves. I had a tendency to know I was spinning and assume she had a clear path and was confident, but maybe not so. Also, based on my initial snooping (have since stopped) didn't realize to the extent she thought poorly of herself and how OM wouldn't like her OR how mad / angry she was at me (was hard to understand that). From the little insight I had it was hard to comprehend her thought process.
So true. Not specific to Christmas cards my case, but can completely relate to this - they'll be upset/complain no matter which approach you take. It may have been you Steve who posted the movie quote "the only way to win is not play the game".
Originally Posted by MrBrside
You will get under her skin even more by just enjoying your life.
Make the most of what you have been given.
I think it was Sandi who once posted.. The WW mindset is a total rollercoaster, as although they are acting on emotion, they are have fear.. They do not think about consequences, but when confronted with them ( ie no names of Christmas cards and people asking questions ) they panic and react - ie in your case, complaining to D.
Make the most of what you have been given.
I think it was Sandi who once posted.. The WW mindset is a total rollercoaster, as although they are acting on emotion, they are have fear.. They do not think about consequences, but when confronted with them ( ie no names of Christmas cards and people asking questions ) they panic and react - ie in your case, complaining to D.
It's so difficult to understand what's going on in their minds, or even realize they may be just as confused and spinning themselves. I had a tendency to know I was spinning and assume she had a clear path and was confident, but maybe not so. Also, based on my initial snooping (have since stopped) didn't realize to the extent she thought poorly of herself and how OM wouldn't like her OR how mad / angry she was at me (was hard to understand that). From the little insight I had it was hard to comprehend her thought process.
Originally Posted by SteveLW
Also, she would have been irritated if mark HAD included her name on the Christmas cards! With WWs there is no winning.
So true. Not specific to Christmas cards my case, but can completely relate to this - they'll be upset/complain no matter which approach you take. It may have been you Steve who posted the movie quote "the only way to win is not play the game".
Re: Same story again pt2 - 03/23/21 08:51 PM
Quote
Also, she would have been irritated if mark HAD included her name on the Christmas cards! With WWs there is no winning.
Steve is like the Jedi Master of seeing through WAW bullshit. Listen to him carefully.
Eventually you’ll realise you can’t placate a WAS no matter what you do, and once you accept that and stop trying or thinking about exactly what you should have said or done, you will have infinitely more time to have a great life.
Re: Same story again pt2 - 04/06/21 09:17 AM
Had a bad nights sleep last night - the first one in a long time!
while i lay there awake i got to thinking about the last 18 months - normally don't think about it!
I manage to put my WW into the Vampire stage of how she sucked all my life blood out of me and caused me to be a shadow of the person i was!
when she had used all my life blood - left to find another victim in the PA (no sympathy)
I am back to where i was 18 months ago now (i think) looking forward to life, eager to move on and upwards and hopefully later on find a person who wants me for who i am.
I did go back to sleep afterwards.
while i lay there awake i got to thinking about the last 18 months - normally don't think about it!
I manage to put my WW into the Vampire stage of how she sucked all my life blood out of me and caused me to be a shadow of the person i was!
when she had used all my life blood - left to find another victim in the PA (no sympathy)
I am back to where i was 18 months ago now (i think) looking forward to life, eager to move on and upwards and hopefully later on find a person who wants me for who i am.
I did go back to sleep afterwards.
Re: Same story again pt2 - 04/13/21 04:33 PM
Originally Posted by Kind18
Steve is like the Jedi Master of seeing through WAW bullshit. Listen to him carefully.
This is so true. Steve has some very good advice!
I've not read your whole situation, but I admire your strength! What we are all going through is not easy and it's confusing and the emotions are all over the place. Embrace the emotions and work through them. They are normal. Don't ignore them, but don't let them stop you from making progress...at least that is what I am trying to do.
Originally Posted by markw
I manage to put my WW into the Vampire stage of how she sucked all my life blood out of me and caused me to be a shadow of the person i was!
when she had used all my life blood - left to find another victim in the PA (no sympathy)
when she had used all my life blood - left to find another victim in the PA (no sympathy)
This comment describes my feelings much of the time about my H lately. The weak ones just want more from the strong ones. We both need to move on with our lives and find equals that support us as we support them and don't suck the lifeblood out of us and give us less in return when we need them! Hang in there!
El
Re: Same story again pt2 - 04/14/21 02:39 PM
Originally Posted by markw
Had a bad nights sleep last night - the first one in a long time!
while i lay there awake i got to thinking about the last 18 months - normally don't think about it!
I manage to put my WW into the Vampire stage of how she sucked all my life blood out of me and caused me to be a shadow of the person i was!
when she had used all my life blood - left to find another victim in the PA (no sympathy)
I am back to where i was 18 months ago now (i think) looking forward to life, eager to move on and upwards and hopefully later on find a person who wants me for who i am.
I did go back to sleep afterwards.
while i lay there awake i got to thinking about the last 18 months - normally don't think about it!
I manage to put my WW into the Vampire stage of how she sucked all my life blood out of me and caused me to be a shadow of the person i was!
when she had used all my life blood - left to find another victim in the PA (no sympathy)
I am back to where i was 18 months ago now (i think) looking forward to life, eager to move on and upwards and hopefully later on find a person who wants me for who i am.
I did go back to sleep afterwards.
I say this a lot. LOL So forgive me for sounding like a broken record, but setting a drop dead date for me was so freeing. Once I decided that I would give her 1 year after BD to fully recommit to the marriage, or I would move forward with D myself, I started sleeping a lot better at night. Most of my sleeplessness was future related, not so much looking back. So once I had a path forward I started sleeping easier at night.
And when that didn't work, a dose of diphenhydramine (Benadryl) did the trick!
Re: Same story again pt2 - 04/14/21 06:29 PM
Got signed off from therapy today - what a huge step it feels!
next step is to come off the anti - depressants, doctor already prescribing half measures on them - so hopefully another month/6 weeks should be off them too.
feeling like i am half human again! roll on being a full human again!
next step is to come off the anti - depressants, doctor already prescribing half measures on them - so hopefully another month/6 weeks should be off them too.
feeling like i am half human again! roll on being a full human again!
Re: Same story again pt2 - 04/15/21 01:29 PM
Congrats Mark! I remember when I started feeling half human. It wasn’t too long afterward that I started to feel like a full human. Once you get past that hurdle, it is smooth sailing. Time and DBing are great healers. (((HUGS)))
Re: Same story again pt2 - 06/13/21 06:09 PM
Just updating my feelings 2 months on from the last post!
i am busy GALing, i have joined 6 local county walk groups and now out with the different groups when ever i can, and loving every moment of it!
Walking football has started up again and i am back doing that!
been to dinner a few times with friends.
D has got herself an evening job in the local chinese take away
also just finished decorating around the house!
not seen or heard from xW or wanting to either! enjoying life too much
i am busy GALing, i have joined 6 local county walk groups and now out with the different groups when ever i can, and loving every moment of it!
Walking football has started up again and i am back doing that!
been to dinner a few times with friends.
D has got herself an evening job in the local chinese take away
also just finished decorating around the house!
not seen or heard from xW or wanting to either! enjoying life too much
Re: Same story again pt2 - 06/14/21 01:07 PM
Originally Posted by markw
Just updating my feelings 2 months on from the last post!
i am busy GALing, i have joined 6 local county walk groups and now out with the different groups when ever i can, and loving every moment of it!
Walking football has started up again and i am back doing that!
been to dinner a few times with friends.
D has got herself an evening job in the local chinese take away
also just finished decorating around the house!
not seen or heard from xW or wanting to either! enjoying life too much
i am busy GALing, i have joined 6 local county walk groups and now out with the different groups when ever i can, and loving every moment of it!
Walking football has started up again and i am back doing that!
been to dinner a few times with friends.
D has got herself an evening job in the local chinese take away
also just finished decorating around the house!
not seen or heard from xW or wanting to either! enjoying life too much
Awesome! Nice work markw, keep it up!!
Re: Same story again pt2 - 09/08/21 10:44 AM
Just updating the last 3 months
met lots of nice people while GALing - lots being in the same situation as i am and looking for company and just generally people to talk to, and it has helped massively for both myself and also i like to think i have helped back!
i am now off of all medication and have been for the last 7 weeks, friends are saying that i am the confident person i was about 2-3 years ago again and they like the old me!
Xw has moved in with the boyfriend now according to my D16 - don't know and don't care - her circus, her monkeys.
D16 started college today - i am glad her life is moving in the right direction! despite her mother.
met lots of nice people while GALing - lots being in the same situation as i am and looking for company and just generally people to talk to, and it has helped massively for both myself and also i like to think i have helped back!
i am now off of all medication and have been for the last 7 weeks, friends are saying that i am the confident person i was about 2-3 years ago again and they like the old me!
Xw has moved in with the boyfriend now according to my D16 - don't know and don't care - her circus, her monkeys.
D16 started college today - i am glad her life is moving in the right direction! despite her mother.
Re: Same story again pt2 - 11/02/21 01:27 PM
markw - How's it going?
Re: Same story again pt2 - 11/03/21 12:38 PM
Originally Posted by BL42
markw - How's it going?
Daughter has now gone from Angry to Depression in her stage of grief about the situation her Mum has caused.
as for me i am enjoying life and just trying to be there for my D through her grief.
the meetup group that i joined is going from strength to strength and i am loving the activities that they arrange.
i haven't seen or heard from XW and i am pleased that she has kept away from me as it has allowed me to grow within myself.
Re: Same story again pt2 - 11/03/21 01:00 PM
Originally Posted by markw
t the situation her Mum has caused.
markw, are you in IC? Letting go of bitterness is an important step in your journey. This sounds very bitter, and something for you to focus on and work on.
Did you love her enough to want her to be happy, even if that if that meant not staying with you? You realize that is all she was doing, was trying to be happy, right?
Re: Same story again pt2 - 11/03/21 01:28 PM
Originally Posted by SteveLW
Originally Posted by markw
t the situation her Mum has caused.
markw, are you in IC? Letting go of bitterness is an important step in your journey. This sounds very bitter, and something for you to focus on and work on.
Did you love her enough to want her to be happy, even if that if that meant not staying with you? You realize that is all she was doing, was trying to be happy, right?
I do Steve - i am in a very good place its my D who is not!
i was in IC - but they signed me off as not requiring further help!
its all about helping my D through her problems with her mother
Re: Same story again pt2 - 11/03/21 01:30 PM
Originally Posted by markw
Originally Posted by SteveLW
Originally Posted by markw
t the situation her Mum has caused.
markw, are you in IC? Letting go of bitterness is an important step in your journey. This sounds very bitter, and something for you to focus on and work on.
Did you love her enough to want her to be happy, even if that if that meant not staying with you? You realize that is all she was doing, was trying to be happy, right?
I do Steve - i am in a very good place its my D who is not!
i was in IC - but they signed me off as not requiring further help!
its all about helping my D through her problems with her mother
Ah sorry I misread that. SO it is your D pointing the finger at her mom, not you. Apologies.
Re: Same story again pt2 - 12/08/21 08:21 PM
12 months today since BD and what have i learnt
1) that this hasn't killed me, infact i have enjoyed the last 7 months or so as a single man (the previous 5 months were not so great as i was on anti depressants and in IC)
i joined meetup and used it for every opportunity that has been presented to me through activities and social events! and loved every part of it
2) been on Holidays and done things in the UK that my STBXW would never have considered doing or visiting!
3) met some lovely people and made some new friends who i enjoy spending time with
4) D turned 17 yesterday and is now boy friended up and seems to be enjoying her own life - although still very annoyed with her Mum and they still clash on a regular basis, not sure how long her anger will continue or if it will ever completely subside?
been invited to a friends for Xmas day and i think i will take the offer up
1) that this hasn't killed me, infact i have enjoyed the last 7 months or so as a single man (the previous 5 months were not so great as i was on anti depressants and in IC)
i joined meetup and used it for every opportunity that has been presented to me through activities and social events! and loved every part of it
2) been on Holidays and done things in the UK that my STBXW would never have considered doing or visiting!
3) met some lovely people and made some new friends who i enjoy spending time with
4) D turned 17 yesterday and is now boy friended up and seems to be enjoying her own life - although still very annoyed with her Mum and they still clash on a regular basis, not sure how long her anger will continue or if it will ever completely subside?
been invited to a friends for Xmas day and i think i will take the offer up
Re: Same story again pt2 - 12/13/21 02:08 PM
Mark, great updated! Glad to see you doing well. On #1, so important to point out because newcomers think that this is going to kill them. Always good to see those that have been going through it for a while can point out that it isn't the end of the world. On #2, that is great! Keep up the GAL! #3 sounds great too, more GAL!
#4, her anger will probably never subside until she deals with it. You may want to offer her IC to see if that will help. I don't blame her for being annoyed with her mom. But holding on to anger is a self prison. Now young person should be imprisoning themselves with bitterness.
Enjoy Christmas day with at your friend's!
#4, her anger will probably never subside until she deals with it. You may want to offer her IC to see if that will help. I don't blame her for being annoyed with her mom. But holding on to anger is a self prison. Now young person should be imprisoning themselves with bitterness.
Enjoy Christmas day with at your friend's!
Re: Same story again pt2 - 04/18/22 11:14 AM
Easter update, well its been 18 months now since XW departed, i have done a lot of growing within that time!
XW came by to pick my D up and i was home, she spoke and in that moment i realised i felt absolutely nothing towards her anymore and i was at peace with myself!
thinking about possibly meeting and dating again, as getting a few offers at the meetup group i belong to! a few ladies are asking for coffee outings away from the group- so things are starting to look up! nothing ventured nothing gained!
i am not looking for a partner at this point - i am looking for fun times and maybe more - but its not the main aim, i just want to be accountable to nobody for a while except me.
D has now got a job with the NHS and starting to enjoy life away from school, still very annoyed with her Mum - but not my problem so not paying any attention to it.
i am now looking forward to the next 3 to 4 months and getting out and enjoying the great outdoors
XW came by to pick my D up and i was home, she spoke and in that moment i realised i felt absolutely nothing towards her anymore and i was at peace with myself!
thinking about possibly meeting and dating again, as getting a few offers at the meetup group i belong to! a few ladies are asking for coffee outings away from the group- so things are starting to look up! nothing ventured nothing gained!
i am not looking for a partner at this point - i am looking for fun times and maybe more - but its not the main aim, i just want to be accountable to nobody for a while except me.
D has now got a job with the NHS and starting to enjoy life away from school, still very annoyed with her Mum - but not my problem so not paying any attention to it.
i am now looking forward to the next 3 to 4 months and getting out and enjoying the great outdoors
Re: Same story again pt2 - 04/18/22 12:47 PM
Originally Posted by markw
XW came by to pick my D up and i was home, she spoke and in that moment i realised i felt absolutely nothing towards her anymore and i was at peace with myself!
Originally Posted by markw
i am not looking for a partner at this point - i am looking for fun times and maybe more - but its not the main aim, i just want to be accountable to nobody for a while except me.
Originally Posted by markw
D has now got a job with the NHS and starting to enjoy life away from school, still very annoyed with her Mum - but not my problem so not paying any attention to it.
Re: Same story again pt2 - 04/18/22 06:36 PM
markw,
Glad to hear life is good and you're thriving. Good luck to your daughter in her new job. I'm definitely looking forward to better weather and getting outside myself. Keep it up the positive attitude!
Glad to hear life is good and you're thriving. Good luck to your daughter in her new job. I'm definitely looking forward to better weather and getting outside myself. Keep it up the positive attitude!
Re: Same story again pt2 - 04/20/22 12:05 PM
Originally Posted by markw
Easter update, well its been 18 months now since XW departed, i have done a lot of growing within that time!
XW came by to pick my D up and i was home, she spoke and in that moment i realised i felt absolutely nothing towards her anymore and i was at peace with myself!
thinking about possibly meeting and dating again, as getting a few offers at the meetup group i belong to! a few ladies are asking for coffee outings away from the group- so things are starting to look up! nothing ventured nothing gained!
i am not looking for a partner at this point - i am looking for fun times and maybe more - but its not the main aim, i just want to be accountable to nobody for a while except me.
D has now got a job with the NHS and starting to enjoy life away from school, still very annoyed with her Mum - but not my problem so not paying any attention to it.
i am now looking forward to the next 3 to 4 months and getting out and enjoying the great outdoors
XW came by to pick my D up and i was home, she spoke and in that moment i realised i felt absolutely nothing towards her anymore and i was at peace with myself!
thinking about possibly meeting and dating again, as getting a few offers at the meetup group i belong to! a few ladies are asking for coffee outings away from the group- so things are starting to look up! nothing ventured nothing gained!
i am not looking for a partner at this point - i am looking for fun times and maybe more - but its not the main aim, i just want to be accountable to nobody for a while except me.
D has now got a job with the NHS and starting to enjoy life away from school, still very annoyed with her Mum - but not my problem so not paying any attention to it.
i am now looking forward to the next 3 to 4 months and getting out and enjoying the great outdoors
mark, God bless you as you start the next chapter of your life!
Re: Same story again pt2 - 12/03/23 03:42 PM
Well here we are 3 years on from BD and now finally divorced, not spoken to her at all in about 18 months.. D has left full time education and now working for the NHS
what can i say about life except its good and it hasn't killed me!
i have met a lovely woman while i was walking with one of the walking groups i belong to, we kept being on the same walks and just hit it off,
we have had holidays together and do a lot of things away from the group.. and long may it continue
so to all that are just entering at the BD stage - hang in there life gets better and the pain will disperse with time
what can i say about life except its good and it hasn't killed me!
i have met a lovely woman while i was walking with one of the walking groups i belong to, we kept being on the same walks and just hit it off,
we have had holidays together and do a lot of things away from the group.. and long may it continue
so to all that are just entering at the BD stage - hang in there life gets better and the pain will disperse with time
Re: Same story again pt2 - 12/04/23 03:43 PM
Good Morning mark
It’s wonderful to hear an update from you. Your life sounds peaceful and good. And yes, hasn’t killed you.
I much concur with your experienced message for those starting out and/or struggling: hang in there, time heals, life does gets better.
Have a great day, and hope your holiday season is merry.
D
It’s wonderful to hear an update from you. Your life sounds peaceful and good. And yes, hasn’t killed you.
I much concur with your experienced message for those starting out and/or struggling: hang in there, time heals, life does gets better.
Have a great day, and hope your holiday season is merry.
D
Re: Same story again pt2 - 12/04/23 05:55 PM
Originally Posted by markw
Well here we are 3 years on from BD and now finally divorced, not spoken to her at all in about 18 months.. D has left full time education and now working for the NHS
what can i say about life except its good and it hasn't killed me!
i have met a lovely woman while i was walking with one of the walking groups i belong to, we kept being on the same walks and just hit it off,
we have had holidays together and do a lot of things away from the group.. and long may it continue
so to all that are just entering at the BD stage - hang in there life gets better and the pain will disperse with time
what can i say about life except its good and it hasn't killed me!
i have met a lovely woman while i was walking with one of the walking groups i belong to, we kept being on the same walks and just hit it off,
we have had holidays together and do a lot of things away from the group.. and long may it continue
so to all that are just entering at the BD stage - hang in there life gets better and the pain will disperse with time
Remember what your learned. Apply it to your new relationship!
Best of luck, onward and upward!