Drowning - 09/28/19 02:33 PM
Any advice would be appreciated. I have started reading the Michelle’s book but still need guidance. My husband and i have been married for 18 years, 1 son (12) and 1 daughter (14). My H sat down Thursday night and stated he was done. This was after i sent a text saying how much i loved him and i know things have been tense lately. No clue he was thinking of walking away. He said we should separate, stated we lived like roommates, we couldn’t make each other happy. He also twisted past fights and things I’ve said (rewriting history?) Of course my first response was that I did not want to divorce, we have so much to lose etc. That made him more angry and he lashed out blaming me for most of the issues in our marriage. I finally just asked him what his plan was. None at this point, doesn’t have an idea when he wants to leave hasn’t spoken to a lawyer, he even asked me where he should get an apartment? Like I’m going to plan his exit for him?!? I just got quite and that pretty much ended the conversation. We had family pictures scheduled for the next night, friday. Later that evening after I come back to the living room he stated angrly that i should just cancel the pics. I stated that I was not going to in a neutral voice stating I had already paid for them. Thinking I would just take the kids. After dinner he asks me to pick up a gift for our niece and stated he would wear a plaid shirt for the pictures. I was dumbfounded he would ask me to pick up presents after telling me he wanted out of our marriage and would want to go to get pictures. At this point I’m just lost. He hasn’t said anything again about leaving but is being very distant. Turning it on (happy, super dad) around the kids and little communication when they are not around. My immediate question is how to handle an upcoming family vacation we planned months ago. We are supposed to leave next Saturday for a week in Yellowstone. Do I bring up the trip, do I ask him when he is moving out? I feel like a hostage not knowing what the hell is going on.
Jo77
Jo77