Feelings.

Much of life is about feelings. Even the most logical of us. Not just with women but with men as well. While dealing with yourself and your WW or WAW spouse, it may help to look at things through a lens of feeling. Even common interactions with friends or strangers, are centered around how one feels when you look at the root.

Friend calls to see what you're up to, aka calling to see how you're feeling.

Coworker finds you in the breakroom and tells you they fixed a broken vehicle. They are likely relaying how good they feel about fixing it.

Parent calls to tell you they are retiring. Maybe they are calling to share how they feel about retiring.

We do this too. Why do you like your favorite hobbies. When you cut down to it, its how it makes you feel. Why you eat what you do, healthy or not, is about how it makes you feel. You are here because of how you feel. You were sent here because of how your WW or WAW feels. Your spouse is on emotional overdrive and as we can see, much of life is about emotion and feelings. Its what makes us....feel alive. Makes us human. Feelings can't be fixed, just worked through. Work on your own in the difficult times. You cannot fix theirs. If they are coming to you to reconcile then of course you can listen, relate, validate, empathize and understand.

Many problems in this world are about how people are feeling and if they are feeling unheard or invalidated. This seems like common sense but sometimes we will forget what others are feeling when we are going through our own troubles. Sometimes if you add the phrase, "I feel like" to what an especially emotional person is saying, then you quickly know what they are dealing with and you can connect with them.

Thats crazy.....I feel like thats crazy.
School is dumb.....I feel like school is dumb.

These moments however small connect us. Your WAW or WW may be severing these connections with you and invalidating or rejecting yours. That is why it is often best to find connection in friends and family, or a good IC. Even the toughest of us, less psychos and socios, need some connection.