I would date her under the right circumstances. Is a little romantic tension between friends a bad thing?
Yes.
Romantic attraction, that draw, that pull towards someone. Awesome feeling.
Tension, is when that pull becomes displayed too much. When one’s attraction is displayed enough to craft tension - yeah, that’s a problem if you ain’t working to be together.
Friends, male or female, you should respect them, trust them, and like them. When you feel romantically attracted, and they to you, enough to be called tension, that’s beyond friendship and is boyfriend/girlfriend territory. Alarm bells should be going off or the beating of your heat should be quickening. Maybe both in this case.
Originally Posted by Traveler
Should it always be resolved immediately by either choosing to date or placing barriers?
It’s interesting reading your statements.
Romantic tension between friends. “Between”, as in not just one way. It is being reciprocated and therefore reinforced and encouraged to grow.
“Choosing to date” gives the impression that you believe (or maybe know) that she’d say yes if you asked to date her. I suspect she has told you such, if not explicitly, most definitely implicitly.
Resolving is also interesting. As if it is only your choice.
Continuing as is, the ongoing tension will likely increase. Desires, when unmet will lead to resentment. This in all likelihood altering your friendship. Desires, when explored will likely alter the friendship. Maybe into something great, maybe not. There is risk and potential problems dating friends.
You only control you!
If you do not wish to risk your friendship, then alter your desires. Utilize your conscious control/mind and influence your emotions to that which serves you.
Should it be resolved? Yes. However, there are more than two choices.
There will likely be conflict in such an endeavour. What is worse than conflict, is conflict delayed. The downstream conflict will be far greater.
Realize if you choose not to date, that is your choice. It may not necessarily be her’s. The barriers you place are actually upon you, not her. In case you choose to go in that direction.
