Hello all, fresh from the Infidelity/Jealousy board. I have been tempted to come over to Piecing for the past few weeks but have hesitated, I think, because of my own lingering doubts. Wife told me yesterday that she wants to fix our marriage and feels that we have already been doing this for a while now.
Here are the threads from my original situation:
Thread #1Thread #2Thread #3Thread #4 Right now we appear to be working on reconnection and, as Wife has told me, we have been doing really well. I want to take it one step further, of course, by attending a Retro weekend (and the follow up sessions) but have not had much feedback from her on this yet. I need to bring it up to her again and tell her that if we are going to fix it we should take advantage of the resources that are available to us.
I believe my Wife is in need of individual counselling as well. A close friend of hers has recommended this to her and she is looking into it.
Good to see you here Michael,
It looked like you disappeared for a while, so I'm glad to hear that things are still going well.
Wife has told me, we have been doing really well
Fabulous! It sounds like the two of you are on the same page (or close to it at least).
Local Retro weekend coming up for April 4th!! Consider it a little spring break.
Welcome MMC,
It's becasue of you I came here. Let's get this board hoppin.
Dr LOve
Thanks guys, good to be here.
My wife and I have handled most of our R discussions via email. This has been a great way for us to sit back and absorb what we both are trying to say without letting emotions get too high. We had some really rough "discussions" back in September and October (and one in November).
On some occassions we'll have a discussion on the phone (as we did Sunday morning) and every once in a while we'll slip into R talk face to face.
With that said... I sent my wife an email this morning telling her that if we are going to give this a genuine attempt then I recommend Retrouvaille. I gave her the link to the site, the contact info for the folks running the show and offered her the chance to speak to someone who has been where she is/was AND has gone to Retro.
I told her that I would not force this issue but instead opened it up to discussion and any options she thought we may want to pursue. She isn't keen on counseling and we both know that, left to our own devices, once we fix our surface issues we will easily slip back into being married and being happy, only to suffer the consequences in approximately 3 years (believe me, this is not the first time we've had issues that we thought we fixed - 3 years is about right for us).
If she is sincere about this then I believe we have what it takes to move forward. I will say that I have doubts and questions regarding her sincerity but I'm sure that's to be expected. We will see.
Michael,
It must have been a wonderful feeling to hear your W commit to working on the M. My W and I too manage much of our conflict by email. It helps to keep things organized, and allows me to respond in a problem-solving manner. In person, I begin to withdraw emotionally out of frustration, as it's more of a rant than a dialogue.
Do you know what the deeper, more sensitive issues are?
CL
CL
Michael
Thanks I needed to hear from you today. While working in the yard my mind started to slip again. I started having doubts I was doing the right thing. Maybe wasting my time. It's so strange when you sit and think back over all of the years we have been together. IT is clear as day that something was not right. But I busted myself at work (lots of overtime) to bring money into the house.
As for the e-mails that is great. As long as it's a two way street. I have sent plenty of e-mails and only had one answered. So I gave up on that. Retro... that is even better. BUT.... I am going to require we go (after W gets a job). That will be part of the deal. WE BOTH NEED IT.
As for the tickling....... Heck I have slept alone now for 8 months. IF WIFE EVEN CAME TO BED WITH ME I WOULD BE tickled.
Keep up the good work Michael.
Yes things are better but we are not even half way there yet...
Husband (Dr LOve)
Good work on bring up Retrouvaille, Michael. I assume that you are referring to Mom of 2 Cherubs as the person she can speak to. I would be happy to speak to her too. I had my culpability issues also. I'd say my email is in my profile, but we all know it no longer is. Ask H, he can put you in touch with me.
Sara
Thanks Sara, I will contact H via email.
So ran into our first setback last night. W was online and ran into OM. This isn't the first time since he walked away - she ran into him last week as well.
Last night, even though they didn't speak, she got into a funk. She stayed online anyway and he eventually logged off. Afterwards her mood was much better.
She was falling asleep at the computer when we decided to go to bed. I mentioned that it probably isn't a good idea to bring herself to sheer exhaustion prior to going to bed. This sparked a poorly-timed discussion.
In short, she isn't as indifferent as she thought. She is NOT currently working on our marriage but we are becoming closer. She doesn't know why he still affects her the way he does. She has unresolved issues that will continue to affect how far down this path we can make it.
To say I'm disappointed would be an understatement. I'm not angry, of course, just a little disillusioned. I find it very tempting to reverse gears right now - to stop treating her like my wife and going back to the roommate stage. I know that's the last thing I should do but I think I do need to pull back just a little bit and give her more room, more opportunity to see what she has in me.
There is nothing I can do that will help her get over OM. I do not want to work on us until she can focus completely on us.
In short, she isn't as indifferent as she thought. She is NOT currently working on our marriage but we are becoming closer. She doesn't know why he still affects her the way he does. She has unresolved issues that will continue to affect how far down this path we can make it.
Take awth the OM statement and ya have my W here...
I find it very tempting to reverse gears right now - to stop treating her like my wife and going back to the roommate stage.
This is what I was saying yesteday when you posted to me. I feel like this way several times a day...
but then I say just one more day... (day after day).
I'll send ya Sara's E-Mail but ya have to remember..I found her first,,
Dr LOve
Thanks H
Wife is on Spring break this week so she's been here all week. I have been going into the office 3 times a week now which appears to be a blessing in disguise. I need time and space for me now.
I am doing my best not to revert to a passive aggressive nature, to being moody and needy. I am trying to keep my distance right now but don't want to get pulled into playing any games. This is all about me right now.
I know she wants to fix the marriage. I don't know WHY she wants to. This is the wrong time for me to become impatient. I feel I was in a better place for myself 2 months ago than I am today.
Michael,
This is exactly why Retrouvaille does work. Piecing by yourselves at home is a minefield. The outside world intrudes on you and affects your thinking. Retrouvaille is a safe place that you go to, removed from the outside world -- no friends, no business, no deadlines, etc. (You can bring your cellphones, but it's best to use it as little as possible.)
It is 2 uninterrupted days of focusing on what is important to each of you in the marriage. And talking to each other about those things. Truth is, our lives are so interrrupted by outside things, we never have a chance to be really quiet and think for ourselves. This is a 48 hour chance to do that.
And the presenters give you questions to think about. They even teach you how to frame questions for yourselves, avoiding the pitfall of negative thinking. Because we all have a little voice inside us that thinks we will fail, and advises us to give up.
The forces inside and outside of ourselves that influence us need to be quieted so you can really get in touch with what you want. Now this isn't a guarantee that you will both end up saying what you want is the marriage. But is does give you the chance to think the questions over in a productive setting. And if she has said it before, I would think she will come to that conclusion again.
My husband and I were not thinking reconciliation when we walked in the door to Retrouvaille. We were looking for a way to call a truce and just end hostilities. But when we quieted down and looked inside, we found the same people we were 28 years ago when we got married. And those people loved each other. Funny how we lost them along the way!
Michael,
Illuminata wrote an excellent description of the Piecing skills needed for the LBS. I think all posters new to the Piecing forum should review it. It will highlight the skills needed for you.
I understand your disappointment regarding your W's recent actions. The challenge is to be disappointed without spinning into negative thoughts that keep you unbalanced.
It sounds like healing is occurring in your M right under your nose. Hold onto your hope that things will get better, and faith in yourself to navigate this phase.
CL
Thank you Sara. I am going to use this information and have an actual discussion with my wife about Retro instead of simply sending her links via email.
CL - I think I'll try to find that post you mentioned, thanks.
My wife sent me an email yesterday morning before I left for the office. It was both reassuring and funny. I took the drive into the office to really think about things and came to the realization that, much like I have tried to do throughout this ordeal, I need to remember who my wife really is. It's not that hard now because she has returned. No fog. No alien. Like me she is nervous, she has doubts and she has trust issues. Although our trust issues are worlds apart, trust is still trust.
I got home from the office and she was already in her pajamas. I told her she looked very snuggly. I said you should come snuggle with this. I had bags in my hands and she said "Why, what do you have?" I put the bags down and said "Just me." She came up and gave me the warmest hug I've had in a long time.
Time, patience and mutual understanding.
That sounds really nice, MMC. It is amazing how much good nice statements like that do for a marriage!
Things have been almost surreal. I am trying to keep my head straight with all of this. She has returned. We both have healing to do and some growing as well. I know it's going to be a while yet but willing to put in the work.
Oh Michael, I am so thrilled for you. What wonderful news. There is work ahead, yes. But you are teaming up to tackle it. So great!
I got home from the office and she was already in her pajamas. I told her she looked very snuggly. I said you should come snuggle with this. I had bags in my hands and she said "Why, what do you have?" I put the bags down and said "Just me." She came up and gave me the warmest hug I've had in a long time.
Perfect move there Michael. Sounds like it was very effective. I think the little endearing or flirty things like that often slip out of our daily interactions which is partly what contributed to the messes we all find ourselves in. Just keep doing more of the same.
Have you spoke to her about Retro yet?
My wife and I had an unexpected talk last night which left me with some very mixed feelings. The best part of the conversation was her openness and the fact that she is showing a real effort in trying to make our marriage work.
I have posted a few times (at least a few) that I take full responsibility for my contribution to the stagnation and souring of our marriage. Last night my wife pointed out something that I hadn't taken into consideration and damn it, she's right.
I made a sexual comment to my wife last night in private and she gave me a look of disgust. I asked her why she seemed bothered by it and she told me that she finds a lot of my comments and actions demeaning. I defended myself telling her that I am only kidding around and besides, we used to always joke around this way.
She told me (mostly my words, I can't remember ver batim...) 1) joking around from time to time is fine but when it becomes a constant, predictable response it becomes insulting and demeaning, 2) although we both used to act in this way, we're in a mature relationship and we should do what we can to "unlearn" this legacy behavior because it does not represent a truly loving and caring relationship and 3) in response to my comment "you never told me it bothered you", she said "I'm telling you now because we can't fix our marriage while this continues".
It was eye-opening. She is correct in saying that at times I treat her more like a sexual object than someone I truly care about. Obviously this was never my intention but nonetheless it happens. I thanked her for her honesty and told her that I am going to work on this. She went further and said that while she believes I love her and care about her for HER, she sometimes feel like she is wanted for no more than some physical fulfillment. She wants a relationship with someone that appreciates who she is, not how sexy she is. She said "If I wanted that, I could get it on any street corner."
and...
She continued with her openness (ouch) and told me that this past summer I had treated her, and a lot of our women friends with a great deal of disrespect through similar behavior. My disrespect towards her was doubled because no one but my wife should receive the attention I was giving women.
I am a flirt but I KNOW that this summer there were times when I pushed the limits and I KNOW I was disrespectful to all involved.
The second best part of the conversation was the fact that she told me these things without accusing me of anything. She was not angry, she was not throwing my past transgressions in my face - she was simply telling me the truth about how my behavior makes her feel. She also stated that she has noticed that I had already shown improvement regarding this even though we never really discussed it before.
So... my immediate reaction was to sit back and think about all the times that I behaved in that way (a few times yesterday alone...). I was ready to beat myself up about it and as if she could hear my thoughts she said "I don't want to rehash all the times this happened, nothing can be done to change that. We need to work on how we're going to move forward from here."
As a pre-cursor to this converation, by the way, she commented on how she has made her own mistakes in our sitch (behavior leading up to the OM and the relationship with the OM).
That sounds good Michael. It is these things we don't know about that are really hurting our marriages. That's why communication is so important. As long as we each think we've swept our complaint under the rug and avoided dealing with it, the harder our lives become. There is a lot of stuff that both of you have put up with from the other, thinking it was better not to say anything, but then holding on to the hurt feelings. And these hurt feelings set a pattern that leads to looking outside the marriage for the support that we should get within the marriage. You did well to not get defensive, but instead be thoughtful and take her comments to heart. This is the path to healing.
I made a sexual comment to my wife last night in private and she gave me a look of disgust. I asked her why she seemed bothered by it and she told me that she finds a lot of my comments and actions demeaning. I defended myself telling her that I am only kidding around and besides, we used to always joke around this way.
Hey MMC,
Been there done that. My W has not said this but... I know she felt that way when I did this also. And like you it was something we too had done in the past and it was ok.
I think you have a great PMA and you give me inspiration all of the time Soooo I hope this does not bring you down but MY PROBLEM is when My wife thinks this I ask myself "then why was it ok to meet a married man in a hotel room and dress up wearing a pink cowboy hat and a boa and him with Pink Dye in his hair and words written in pink across his chest and allow him to take pictures of you? WAS he just interested in your mind? Was he going to leave his wife so you two can talk philosophy? Discuses the meaning of life?
Ya see I don't know your sitch but I have done without sex because I was married. If My WIFE felt she did not have the need well so be it I signed up for this contract. IT"S the fact that something I gave up for her was NO BIG DEAL that she gave it to someone else.
Catching up on your sitch because you and I are so close to the same thing sometimes it’s scary but I do have a question. Did you W actually move out with the OM? See this is where I feel like a wimp. My W NEVER moved out.
Stay strong big guy. We will get through this.
DrLove
My wife has never even met the OM in person. It started as an online relationship and secret phone calls late at night. I suspected something after a picture was sent to her cell phone (she pulled the phone out of my hand and pretended she had no clue what the picture was).
Things escalated quickly after that. He walked away twice and came back twice. The second time he came back she was so far gone there was no stopping her from leaving me and the kids. Her phone never left her side (it was under her pillow while sleeping).
Can't get into all the details but OM finally saw the light and walked a way a 3rd time just after mid-December.
It has now been 3 months since their relationship ended. The last month and a half has been where I have seen things beginning to turn around and we began to talk about our marriage and how we MIGHT be able to save it. It was only last week that she said she wanted to make it work.
During this time I have bounced between elation and despair. I was elated to see us reconnecting and rebuilding and to hear that she WANTS this marriage. I felt despair when I looked back and saw how our marriage was dragged through the mud and felt no desire to carry on. I am sure that these swings are to be expected.
I still have swings but the extremes are no longer so far apart. As I have posted previously, I can easily beat myself up for letting her down with some of the things she has been telling me. I have spent the last 6 months working on my issues which I knew had caused problems in our marriage.
I won't beat myself up though because without knowing these things - without the open communication - I simply can't get an accurate reading on how WE are doing.
without the open communication - I simply can't get an accurate reading on how WE are doing.
Yes my man. this is the secret. My W also will not let her phone far from her side. This will be something I will tackle later on. TRUST... She can look at my phone anytime..
I too am working on communication. BUT..... you seem to be taking on more of the "cause" of your W actions that seems fair. SHE could have told you what was bothering her also.
We will get through this buddy.. you watch my back and I'll watch yours
Dr Love
MMC, Haven't posted to you before, but I'm inspired reading your thread (I'll get to the earlier ones later).
I seem to be about one month behind you. OM dumped WW (as best I can tell) on 2/6. She told me she wanted a divorce that night. 6 weeks later she's telling me she's not going anywhere for at least 2 years (when last son graduates from H.S.). And just these last couple weeks she's started responding.
Hoping in another month she'll make the commitment your wife has. I had a friend on another board tell me that breaking up the affair was the easy part. It's the recovery that's HARD.
Not trying to TJ. Just wanted to say Thanks for the lift! You're an inspiration that I'm on the right track and things will work out as long as I'm patient.
Been a week of ups and downs here. The downs have been due to my over-analysis of things my wife says and fluctuations in our interactions.
We've had a couple of awkward conversations and things really seemed to be going downhill quick.
Last night was no exception I'm afraid.
Anyway, I wrote my wife an email explaining what I believe to be at the root of my behavioral changes - trust. She hasn't given me any reason NOT to trust her since sometime around the beginning of the year and yet whenever I sense a shift in her dealings with me I start to wonder what's on her mind, what she's planning - in short, I'm looking for a sign of deception.
Coming to that conclusion this morning has been a weight off my shoulders. My trust in her will not come overnight. She also has trust issues with me. Not that she's afraid I'm going anywhere but she wonders when the other shoe is going to drop and I prove that my changes are not real.
Time, patience, growing and healing.
We're going out tonight to see Milo Z with some friends and family. She has never seen them and we're both really looking forward to a night out.
I wrote my wife an email explaining what I believe to be at the root of my behavioral changes - trust.
Dude...Yes you are right. It will take time. But what you need to focus on is what you can change and what you can't. I know where you are comming from. EVERYTIME my W left the house, thoughts of "is she going to see him?" came across my mind. The funny thing is "He" lives about 800 miles away... So what got me through this "trust issue" was I can't change the fact that she is leaving the house. And if she WAS going to see him I can't change that eaither. so I can not worry about it. There really is no trust issue you need to deal with in your R right now that is really THAT important... Hey think about me... soon after I found out about the affair I had to have surgery. I put my W down as the person that would make the desision if something went wrong to "pull the plug" Ok now that is really something I had a hard time with. but I did it.
What I am trying to say is try not to worry about trust at this time. Unless you two are in a knife throwing contest there is not much she can do R wise that can hurt you. I guess it is part of letting go...
"trust" me I have been there done that...
Dr LOve
I agree Husband. I have also come to the conclusion that there is nothing I can do if she ever decides that she needs to leave me. I have gotten myself to a place, or at least close to a place, where I will be fine.
The issues come when I begin to feel that we're really working at things and then, when there's any kind of a lull, some defense mechanism gets triggered and I start thinking it's all a sham.
Anyway, I was running out to grab some cash for our night out and was looking out onto our deck from the kitchen doing a mental inventory (keys, wallet, cellphone, etc.) Wife came up from behind me and gave me a hug and said "drive safe".
I was NOT expecting that but I reached my arms back around and gave her a hug back (in an odd kind of way). It was very reassuring. I believe it has been inspired by my email but that's okay, I also believe that she needed some help to break the inertia.
We went to see Milo Z (I posted about them a few weeks ago as well). We had an amazing time. We danced the entire time we were there. And Milo Z is
FUNKY so the dancing was quite close and exciting!!
I bought Wife their CD and she had it signed by Milo. Went back BIL's house for a bit and got home just a little while ago (2:30-ish).
And a bit of a feather in my cap - I had all of 2 drinks while we were out. I told my wife a few days ago that I would not be going out for drinks although I might have a couple. Me + Sitch + Drinking = Trouble
I usually need a little liquid courage to get out on the dance floor but not tonight. We walked in, grabbed a drink for my wife and were on the floor within the first 5 minutes.
So instead of me drinking and getting moody and pissed for NO reason, we had a great time and she has been smiling from the moment she first heard the band until she went to bed.
Speaking of which, it's my time to sleep.
I'll probably be dancing for the next few days. Glad we got the CD so we can "practice" for the next time Milo's around.
If they ever get out to your various locations, I highly recommend checking them out.
Gimme dat, gimme dat, gimme dat, gimme dat funk!
The issues come when I begin to feel that we're really working at things and then, when there's any kind of a lull, some defense mechanism gets triggered and I start thinking it's all a sham.
Ok MMC Quit writing about ME..... There comes a time... not sure when or how it happens but you realize that ALL of your feelings are caused my you. YOU make yourself Sad, YOU make yourself Happy. It’s like music..... If ya listen to a sad song you get sad... if it's a Happy one you get happy...what we need to do is just like with the radio...if a sad song comes on we can turn the chanel, we need to learn how to do that when situations arize in our lives...Ok you have a great opertunity here... Remember how it felt when your W came up behind you and hugged you... I bet you are smiling right now thinking about it..Ok LOCK this memory in your head...... NEXT time this trust issue or any other issue that brings you down shows its ugly head THINK ABOUT THIS HUG....It really works... Sometimes when I am sitting in the room and W walks in I can bring up one of these happy thoughts and I start SMILEING...
Take Care buddy ya owe me a beer...
Dr LOve
Ha ha! Owe you a LOT of beer!
Yeah, and that's the point I was able to get to yesterday (think it was yesterday). My doubts are byproducts of everything that has happened in the past 6+ months. If we're going to heal, I need to let go and see what's happening NOW.
That hug, her calling me "love" last night, the hours of dancing are all things that will help to keep me looking forward. Don't want to miss a thing.
Gimme dat, gimme dat, gimme dat, gimme dat funk!
Hah!!
I read that last line and starting singing! Milo Z is a cool band. Sounds like you guys had a great time.
MICHAEL!!!! i wish we could have gone to see Milo with you!! They are so much fun...you were right down the street and never came by - for shame!!! just kidding.
Glad to hear things are on the mend. Hope to see you all agian soon!
bring it up to level 5, gotta bring it up to level 5....
So instead of me drinking and getting moody and pissed for NO reason, we had a great time and she has been smiling from the moment she first heard the band until she went to bed
Wow, these are such wonderful things to read on your thread!!!! Just popping in to say hey!
Keep it up Mcc,
I need the insperation now....strange days....I almost feel like I am living two lives....
Dr Love
Okay, I guess I've been away long enough. I have to admit that I have had very little desire to come to these boards anymore - as negative as that sounds, I feel it is a positive. I started coming here out of desperation, I met MANY MANY wonderful and helpful people that showed me the way to get where I am today. And suddenly, when things started going well, I guess I decided I didn't have the need to post any longer.
Quite frankly, as much as I think of others' situations, I find it difficult to actually come and read/post anymore. Maybe it's some twisted guilt thing...
I am going to try to catch up on everyone's threads - especially those who have not made it to piecing yet.
Just some quick recaps from northern NJ:
1) Wife has thanked me for sticking to my guns
2) Wife begans saying ILY about 2 weeks ago
3) We have had some very intimate moments, mostly kissing and cuddling.
We are not 100%. Hell, we may not be 50%. Things are moving forward though. I will not settle for the status quo IF the status quo is as far as we are going to get. We both understand there is a lot of work to do but at times I feel she is dragging her feet. I try to look at things from her perspective and that usually helps. Actually, what really helps, is when either of us have a concern about something, we bring it up in conversation and we talk about it.
thanks again to everyone!
Hey all. Still sticking around but I don't get on the board much these days.
My wife and I have had some very intimate moments (ML x 3 since about 2 weeks ago). The spontaneous ILY's have decreased a little but they are there from time to time. I always get the ILY2's if I initiate though.
Kissing/Hugging has decreased a bit too, although she does catch me by surprise sometimes still. Again, if I initiate they are returned.
So, time for some overanalysis on what MAY be happening:
1) We may be losing touch again and the "spark" is fading.
2) The intimacy we've had was "forced" by my wife in order to try to feel like a "normal" husband and wife again.
3) My wife still has trust issues regarding my intentions and is trying to keep me at arms length
4) She is uncomfortable initiating ILY's and physical contact because of a perception that maybe I will turn her away
5) I feel that if I initiate too much, she will feel smothered
I guess the only real way to discover the answer is to talk to her about it.
I also have to say that over the past 6 weeks or so I've rediscovered my romantic side and have provided, in my opinion, some of the romance she had once complained was lacking (candles and flowers in the bathroom when she got home from school, a couple notes left in various locations, a very open and heartfelt note on Mother's day, strawberries and melted chocolate while she takes a bath... I'm not Don Juan but I'm certainly putting in an effort).
The "trouble" is that she doesn't react the way I would like her to. She tells me it's very nice, very thoughtful, she says "wow" and I know she's happy with it. It's just that something feels like it's missing. Maybe a kiss, maybe a hug. Maybe I'm expecting too much too soon. She was excited about the bath with the flowers and candles, she told me that she had read the note from Mother's day 3 times... something just doesn't feel right.
Finally, she told me a couple weeks ago that she does not always feel that I love her but that instead I love the sex. I admit that a lot of my comments HAD been sexually oriented towards her leading up to her comments. We both agreed at that point that this was an unfortunate byproduct of how we used to treat each other. I do believe that there is some hesitation on her part to become fully 'engaged' in a marriage with me until I can show her that it is HER that I love. This is what I have been trying to do.
Mike,
Have you read the 5 Love Languages book? Maybe you show your love through the physical intimacy. Maybe the book would help her to understand that.
You know, I meant to pick that up quite a while back. I first heard about it on Frank_D's thread and then a few times after (Rob1231 and I think from you as well).
My wife and I, I am beginning to understand, react lovingly to different things. It seems however, that she reacts to multiple "languages" at times and then to NO languages at other times.
Reading the book will probably help me sort this out and very likely help her to understand me a little more.
We are going to NC on Friday for our annual trip to the beach. I have to admit that I was NOT expecting to be where we are now when this time of year came around. If for nothing else I'm glad we are going as a family AND that we are in a far more positive position than we were in the beginning of the year.
Thanks HFF. I hadn't thought about that book in quite a long time.
Almost a year later and I'm sorry to say that I'm back. I'm not sure which forum I should be in at this point but for now, Piecing seems to work.
My wife and I have had some major setbacks over the past few months and once again we are on the rocks. I just re-read my posts on this thread and I'm amazed by how things have degraded.
I find myself bouncing from hopeful to ready to throw in the towel.
Although I'm not prepared to get into all the details right now, I do have to say that I wish I took Frank_D's advice about fixing myself. Issues from the past do, unfortunately, continue to haunt those LBS's and it seems my inability to get over the hurt in a "timely manner" has pushed my wife away once more.
Hey Michael,
Sorry to see you are back on here. I haven't checked out posts on here for a few weeks and when I am on, it's only to follow the threads of a few folk.
My situation has not improved at all. LOL. We actually finalized the big D two weeks ago, so I am back to officially single.
Give me a call sometime. Maybe we can do Mr. Sushi again.
How are you doing?
Don't give up. Never give up. You can do this...it's just training.