It's been a while... - 05/10/11 02:56 PM
I don't know if anybody remembers me. My XH left me when I was seven months pregnant with my second child. That was about two years ago. I haven't posted much in the past year or so b/c since our divorce (9 mos ago) I've just been living my life...
XH and I have spent a lot of time together lately doing things with the kids. It’s nice, when dealing with two small kids to have an extra set of hands. We haven’t fought over anything big in about six months or so. We’ve been getting along like normal, almost.
Well, he wants to come back home. He swears it’s not financial – he doesn’t care if he’s poor, but he misses his family. Not just the kids, he even told me he loved me yesterday. (It was weird, I asked him if he was talking to the cat. :P)
A big part of me is considering it.
• My mom is having surgery next month and we’re going to have to pay my sister for childcare. Plus, we want to put DD1 in preschool this fall. It would be great to not have to worry about finances as much.
• I think it might be easier on the kids too – more often than not now DD1 doesn’t want to go over to his apartment, and DD2 always wants to be with Daddy.
• I would be able to do stuff that I wouldn’t be able to otherwise – go to the gym, go out with friends if he’s home even if he has to work in the morning, take showers by myself, etc.
• Another part of it is feeling that this has to play out somehow – either it works and that’s great, or it doesn’t, and then there’s some finality to our relationship. We can’t go on forever being as friendly as we are right now (to the point where we’re just a tad over-involved in each other’s lives).
There’s the obvious concerns too. Trust issues, etc.
I feel really stupid for considering it because about a year ago we were going to reconcile, and I jumped right in with both feet for him to jump right out. It has a lot to do with what people will think of me. I know if I do this and get burned, I’m not going to get sympathy, and I’m fine with that.
As far as XH, he's done a few months of therapy and he, for the most part, reminds me more of the XH I actually married.
XH and I have spent a lot of time together lately doing things with the kids. It’s nice, when dealing with two small kids to have an extra set of hands. We haven’t fought over anything big in about six months or so. We’ve been getting along like normal, almost.
Well, he wants to come back home. He swears it’s not financial – he doesn’t care if he’s poor, but he misses his family. Not just the kids, he even told me he loved me yesterday. (It was weird, I asked him if he was talking to the cat. :P)
A big part of me is considering it.
• My mom is having surgery next month and we’re going to have to pay my sister for childcare. Plus, we want to put DD1 in preschool this fall. It would be great to not have to worry about finances as much.
• I think it might be easier on the kids too – more often than not now DD1 doesn’t want to go over to his apartment, and DD2 always wants to be with Daddy.
• I would be able to do stuff that I wouldn’t be able to otherwise – go to the gym, go out with friends if he’s home even if he has to work in the morning, take showers by myself, etc.
• Another part of it is feeling that this has to play out somehow – either it works and that’s great, or it doesn’t, and then there’s some finality to our relationship. We can’t go on forever being as friendly as we are right now (to the point where we’re just a tad over-involved in each other’s lives).
There’s the obvious concerns too. Trust issues, etc.
I feel really stupid for considering it because about a year ago we were going to reconcile, and I jumped right in with both feet for him to jump right out. It has a lot to do with what people will think of me. I know if I do this and get burned, I’m not going to get sympathy, and I’m fine with that.
As far as XH, he's done a few months of therapy and he, for the most part, reminds me more of the XH I actually married.