Link to previous thread Well,
interesting developments this morning for those still following a long, ugly process with just me commiserating.
After mulling it over for several days I sent "the letter".
I got an answer!This is as close to "real" communication as we've had in months, if not longer.
I have asked her to go with me to Colorado and see Michele. She answered once about being afraid of things reverting. I said there was no gamble in this, if it doesn't work, it doesn't work. What I do know is we are both destroying our lives at the moment. The L's are in control, and only she has the power to stop things - if even temporarily.
It looks like
she will let me have the dog for 3 days when she's out of town - however it's not quite as altruistic as it sounds. Our friend who would be sitting - her husband has ALS and things took a rapid turn for the worse. Still, this is progress! Normally, she would have gotten her assistant to stay at the house or something else.
I have not heard an answer back, and this letter was a strange mix of DR and a 180 at the same time. However,
something happened. I feel if I can get her to go to Colorado for a 2-day intensive, that's all I would want.
This could be huge. Thanks for listening.
Ok, the WW just emailed me. She is going to let me have the dog while she is out of town (I don't care what she's doing).
She says she will "consider" seeing Michele, she's afraid of things going bad. She wants to work without L's, but I'm not going down that road. I want her to see what she's done, and the consequences. She's back Tuesday, court is Wednesday, so there's no talking between now and then.
Your "Plan Michele" sounds like a Hail Mary Pass at Recovery. I'm wondering if your WW is just placating you, hoping to postpone the court date?
CWOL,
there's no postponing the court date. She knows that. I'm done budging, and told her that she's set everything in motion. Once again she said something about working things out without L's, to which she received no answer.
She has this choice - go to see Michele. If it doesn't work, it doesn't work. There's no change.
She said she doesn't know if she wants to put forth the "effort". Well, she's going to see what real effort is all about, and soon. Sounds to me as if a few days in Boulder couldn't be that bad.
2 days and the rest of your life.
In the meantime, I get my sweet little dog for 3 days and 2 nights! Hooray! I'm almost beside myself.
1313,
So happy that you finally get to see your dog. Also hope that maybe your WW takes you up on "Plan Michele"
Awesome 13! I like plan Michelle, you might as well try it, you got nothin to lose.
Hi GWH, Melo,
no - there's nothing but a potential upshot.
Something must have changed, because she answered the letter. That in itself is something.
She keeps talking about trying to work things out amicably without L's - and I'm just not going there. Everything else is solid DR from here on out.
Hinting at even the slightest possibility of considering going to Boulder is huge. She's obviously lost some resentment, and is perhaps reflecting on her insane rebellion. Or, she's not and playing. She can play but it won't get her anything. I go dark.
Regardless, getting the dog before court is something. I will follow her instructions to the letter, and won't pull anything. Maybe even leave a thank-you card.
I refuse to get on the roller coaster again, so I'm staying detached and taking this day by day. I can hardly wait for tomorrow.
She keeps talking about trying to work things out amicably without L's - and I'm just not going there. Everything else is solid DR from here on out.
Hinting at even the slightest possibility of considering going to Boulder is huge. She's obviously lost some resentment, and is perhaps reflecting on her insane rebellion. Or, she's not and playing. She can play but it won't get her anything. I go dark.
Hope you are right, but from the last time about keeping the L's out, is it another attempt at D using mediation instead of litigation?
I hope sincerely that she's not pretending to consider what you want to get what she wants. You probably need to have a conversation in order to figure that out.
I'm wondering - what prevents you from keeping the dog once you have it? She's kept it for 3 months, why don't you keep it for 3 months now? From what I know, posession is half the law. I'd take the dog to the vet for a checkup while you have it, too, so you can get some records and other documentation in your hands.
Hope you are right, but from the last time about keeping the L's out, is it another attempt at D using mediation instead of litigation?
This is what she is trying to do at the moment, yes. It's not going to happen, plain and simple. We go to court on Wednesday, and she'll get a taste of what's in store. I have made it obvious at this point that this is how things will proceed. She can ask about anything else all she wants. She just won't get a response.
The W mentioned in our little back-and-forth today that I was out to ruin her financially. If she really believes that, she's still pretty far out there.
This quote from your post on my thread gives me pause to think that she is sincere about Plan Michele or any types of reconciliation. She's motivated by preservation of the assets more than anything.
I know I am too, after seeing my WW's tactics. I suggested mediation to her but she feels that I would "cheat" her. I'm sure we would arrive at the same number either way, just with a lot less legal fees paid. But of course her L is not going to tell her to save on legal fees!
Painter,
she can pretend all she wants. Doesn't matter to me. I won't bite on anything.
I know she's been taking great care of the dog, and I won't play any games as far as keeping her. I'm going to be 100% honest, and keep my word as I always have. Any insanity, any spite, any games will need to be played by the WW. Because, doing this will confirm her crazy accusations.
If we go to court on Wednesday, and she says "he didn't give the dog back", that's ammo.
She's got a choice. I will only slow things down, consider a "break" for one reason. We see Michele. End of story.
Wednesday might just be the slap of reality she needs to help clear the fog. Something has happened - but I can only assume it's a temporary thing. One further advantage - the "old friend" that I believe talked some sense into her for a month ago? The WW will be with her for a few days week after next.
At this point I'm done asking, done pushing. I put it out there. I am now in 100% DR mode. She can take the offer or leave it. I'm off the grid again until she comes to some sort of decision. The ball is in her court.
This quote from your post on my thread gives me pause to think that she is sincere about Plan Michele or any types of reconciliation. She's motivated by preservation of the assets more than anything.
I know I am too, after seeing my WW's tactics. I suggested mediation to her but she feels that I would "cheat" her. I'm sure we would arrive at the same number either way, just with a lot less legal fees paid. But of course her L is not going to tell her to save on legal fees!
My more specific offer came after her little tantrum. I'm not doing mediation, period. Yes, I'm better than that - she's not. This is one of the few times she's said "we" for a long, long time. She can stick it. She will find out how bad things are on Wednesday. I've told her money doesn't matter, but I will protect myself and my Mother. I will also take what's legally mine in the state she chose to sue me in.
So, she's got a choice to make. Either way, fine. I know that if she does go to Boulder, I will get the truth regardless of the outcome.
Well, I got my little dog just an hour ago - and it was a pretty bittersweet reunion. She has gotten a lot older in 3 months. She's going blind in one eye - it's all clouded up - and she's just not her perky old self. I tried taking her for a walk, and she put the brakes on like her sister used to when she was getting so ill.
I'm happy to see her and have her though, I don't think she's got a whole lot longer. So sad.
Oh, and something else I suppose is worth mentioning, would love some thoughts.
The WW left the house open (through the garage for which my opener still works) for me to freely access the house. (!?). I noticed that a portrait of us and the dogs is still on the mantel, and a caricature done by an artist of us in the guest bath. Don't know if that means anything or not.
It appears she bought the Land Rover I thought was the OM's, or it's on long-term loan. It's sitting outside which is strange, I'd put it in the garage. The thing that's missing is the temp registration which should be in the window if she bought it. So I'm not sure what's up with that. It's been there for a week or so. I'll see if it suddenly goes away when she leaves. I do know that she's trying to drive her expenses through the roof so she doesn't have to pay me as much money.
WW cray cray.
I would grab anything left you have in the house, 1313, and never step in it again while she's gone.
Just my opinion, though. I think being there would hurt your GAL'ing.
Yes, she's cray cray. Not doing anything to the house would signal to her that you're moving on, which is a good thing.
She's pulling an Admiral Ackbar on you - "IT'S A TRAP!"
She's pulling an Admiral Ackbar on you - "IT'S A TRAP!"
I have no idea. I sort of thought I'd see some sort of change, besides a bunch of magazines spread on the coffee table like a #@*& doctors office. The portrait is easily removed, it's just standing there. The caricature - there's plenty of other art to hang on the hook.
Heck, I had even just finished moving the coffee table (it's big and heavy) with some moving men glides when I suddenly departed the next day, and they're still there under the table. The whole house is a time capsule.
Weird. It was very strange being in there, and I made it brief.
Be very careful my friend!
Be very careful my friend!
That's what I'm doing - fear not! As far as I'm concerned, nothing has changed. Except I have the dog for 3 days. I did email the WW once to ask if I could get the eye meds for her, then again to say they were no longer there and I was taking the dog to the vet tomorrow - if it was alright with her.
So, I'm taking the dog to the vet to look at her eye. If it's something like an ulcer or a scratch - that's ammo for me. I seriously can't believe the WW would have let that happen. Plus, she's a bit overfed (and has a heart condition) so I'm a little [expletive] off.
Oh, the Land Rover appears to belong to the WW - so she bought an
incredibly expensive and not particularly reliable vehicle. That's Sandi's "rebellion", because the WW knows already about them. Maybe it was her BF's and she bought it? There's no temp registration in the window which is odd. Oh well, not my problem. Heh.
This is her raising her expenses so she doesn't have as much spousal support to pay. Makes sense to me, right? And that's the "resentment" part.
Oh no, she really loves me and wants me back, I can tell!Bwahahahahaahaha. I guess I feel a LOT better having the dog right now.
I'm glad you have your dog! So sorry that she's not doing so well... Was she happy to see you? She may be depressed over you being gone, if you used to be her primary caretaker. I hope the eye condition can be managed.
I would expect the judge to look at W's expenses and income from before you separated - they are used to people doing everything they can to try to make it look like they have less.
Enjoy your days with your dog!
Painter, good point about them looking at her changing her expenses. That's just a crazy expenditure she just made - it blows my mind. In fact, her real estate coach who makes tons more than she does - wanted one of these but wouldn't buy it.
It's so good to have the dog, but it is sad that she's just not her perky self. She didn't seem so happy to see me when I went to get her, but she's right next to me now. I think you're right - after a week of being gone she'd turn inside out to see me, but old age and sadness (yes, I was the person she was with all day) were all in the mix. 3 months is a long time in dog days.
Oh well, guess I should go get dinner started. I'll check in later. Thanks!
1313 sorry, I was away for the weekend and just got caught up on your thread. Great news about you getting to see your doggy. I hope you are having an outstanding time!! Sorry to hear that the WW's front seems like a way to just buy time. I have no idea what the lack of changes in the house means or does not mean. I can tell you my WW has taken every and any step she could to delete me form her life. So the fact that the pics are still up may give some semblance of hope. But honestly I do not have a clue. Maybe look around the threads and see what others have to say. To give some background on mine, WW left any pic with me in it here. Her FB states we are divorced although I just filed last week. The only thing she did want from me was the rings, but that I know was just cause of the value.
Well buddy good luck and keep taking the high road but make sure you are taking it for your own integrity, not for her respect.
Don't read too much into these things. Remember, only believe half the things she does, if you are DBing!
Hi Tim, I know you were off having a great weekend - so no worries.
CWOL, I'm not taking anything for face value. What I do know is there was a slight "softening", what the real reason is I don't know. It could be that the guy who normally sits the dog is in the hospital - other people were available.
I'm grateful for having the dog for what little time I do have her. But I'm thanking God for that, not the WW.
I do consider her actions sort of a 50/50 at best. However, the choice is simple. She said she would "consider" the counseling. Her tone seems to have softened considerably. All monetary? Highly likely, yes. I will have a much better idea after court on Wednesday when she sees the reality of what she's done.
I do consider her actions sort of a 50/50 at best. However, the choice is simple. She said she would "consider" the counseling. Her tone seems to have softened considerably. All monetary? Highly likely, yes. I will have a much better idea after court on Wednesday when she sees the reality of what she's done.
1313,
Don't get your hopes up, don't try to mind-read. That is how we LBH's get hurt.
It's like her original "stop the divorce" drama. Just a smokescreen to confuse you. If she were serious about Reconciliation, she would tell you directly and eagerly.
My WW didn't send up these false signals but neither did she actively oppose R. Later I found out she was sharpening a knife to put in my back called "D."
CWOL,
yeah I already got the vitriol and resentment this very moment. After returning from the Vet, I sent her the results, what the vet told me (weight gain - bad for a dog with a bad heart, tartar buildup on teeth - wife stopped brushing) along with info on her eye-ulcer, the meds, and a photo.
The WW fired back that I was doing all this to make her feel bad, and that she was hoping we could be civil, without L's, etc. etc., so she already let her mask slip. No surprises. She's as mean as ever.
So, I simply answered back that I was simply passing on the info after having the vet tell me these things, I'm concerned for the dog and not her feelings. If she cannot learn and adapt, then I'm sorry.
Honestly, the dog would not be in this bad a shape if I was still taking care of her. Pathetic WW's, always concerned for themselves, aren't they?
So, guns blazing at court on Wednesday.
Oh, and I probably blew it by not "validating" her feelings, rather saying I didn't care about how she felt and was concerned with the dog.
Oh well, better luck next time? Nah.
Weeeeeeird.
I was sitting here working, and I got a facebook notification. I don't really do facebook - at all. It seemed a bit odd and I clicked as it was coming in.
It said "do you know...", and holy smokes. It was an old college GF from 1978?! Man, did I fall head over heels for her. I guess it's God's way of saying there's life out there. Maybe I'll say something to her in a month or three.
Sorry to hear the bad news about your dog and wife. But it's probably better for you to learn the truth now than to anticipate a miracle happening with your WW. I think what you need to recognize is that WW's will not change overnight. Don't believe anything she says, and only 1/2 of what she does.
CWOL - Oh yeah, no surprises really.
But I did "validate" her feelings, asked her to please re-read the message I sent, and I knew she was doing her best. I said please don't resent me to the point you can't see what I'm saying.
She sent "thank you" and is now probably scratching her head.
Journaling:
Today was the court SOC date. We chopped stuff up. Wife gets the house, I get to keep my trust and properties, and have 2 years to refinance since I'm technically fired from husband and job at the same time.
WW tried to talk to me, not sure what about other than giving me some sort of "be friends" $#%*. I said that we either work it out, or she's dead to me. No middle ground. She said she's not staying married to me, I said goodbye.
It's been incredibly depressing to think about what's being liquidated, and all of a sudden I've been given an insane amount of debt to get rid of in 6 months, where selling one piece of art (that I bought when we got married and she had no job) will help the WW get rid of some of hers. I'm supposedly coming out ahead on this - but I sure don't feel like it.
There's going to be an arbitrator hired, which is supposed to speed things up and be far faster than a court appointed judge. I'd almost rather drag it out - but felt so beat up I just agreed. It will be less money. Divorce stinks.
Oh, BTW the WW looked terrible. She's aged a lot. Wish that made me feel better, it doesn't.
Hugs and prayers for you. You're gonna make it through to the other side, and be much better!!!
It sounds like a depressing experience, and icky, which it often is.
Was anything decided about your dog?
1313,
Sorry about what happened, but I guess it's better to have finality and closure than to be hanging by her ambiguous words. (Dangling Plan Michele in front of you, etc.)
How long did it take you to get to this place from her filing for D to now? I am not looking forward to this at all.
Sorry to hear about the experience. I am praying for you.
Hi everyone, thanks for the thoughts. Let me go down the list of Q's...
Painter, yeah - I'm in a major funk for the moment. Cutting up 30 years of stuff like a hunk of meat with 2 L's who could give a @#%&...
The dog - it appears we're going to share, a week on and a week off. When that starts, who knows. I do know the dog isn't being cared for as she should, and it's kind of shocking. The fact she was sooo overweight and had an eye-ulcer. I honestly gasped and started crying when I saw her, for a moment I thought her eyes had turned white and she was going blind from age/heart failure. She could barely wake up. Then I could see it was just one eye, and terribly bloodshot. I mean, come on!
CWOL, yeah - I figured she was playing games, and still is. Or who knows. I don't care. She was down that "friends" path before. You know what? I've been fired as husband AND friend. My best friend as a matter of fact. Doing everything she can to #$%* me over. Nice.
In CA, they say it takes 6 months, it looks like we're on schedule. The WW filed on 1/8, I found out 1/11, and it was accepted around the 18th or so.
However, 6 months would NOT be the case if I were to have asked for a court appointed judge to look at our assets instead of a guy we pay for and both parties agree to. The L said that they have a backlog of weeks and weeks, and if one little thing has a Q, it goes back to the end of the line. I almost asked for that - but it would cost a LOT more in the longrun, as who knows what the WW might suddenly think next week.
Ralph, JimKao, I'll take those prayers, and send some back.
otw, thanks - it's very stressful, I can't believe one human being could do this to another (after 35 years of life together), but here we are.
1313
These are the moments I normally avoid on the boards. I am not good at these moments for others.
So it is something I'm trying to get outside my comfort zone on.
Let me bore you for a minute and hopefully occupy your mind at least!
I was raised my a single mom. Dad was bad for a period I don't remember well except the worst. He was in my life growing up but from 6 hours away. People I tell the story to can't believe it. He is the complete opposite of what was when all happened. I guess that goes to show we can all change no matter what.
Anyway. Mom made miracles for me and sister. Honestly don't know how. No real education no high paying job but I can't remember going without. Even expensive things like top of line stuff for sports.
She had a bad run with men. Few were in our lives and left an impression on me that I would never be.
I gained all my thoughts about how to act from coaches and bosses at jobs.
So it is hard for me to show a sensitive side. Obviously got better when my first born baby girl showed up. I think she melted me a bit.
Anyway. I know I am not the most vocal compassionate person but when. I read this my heart hurts.
The thing that kills me is that your situation is fairly fresh and Moved so fast. I have a hard time understanding after all you guys have been through that decisions can be made on her end. I know she had prob had things coming for a while but how can you not give totaled some time just allow and see how they pan out.
My heart hurts for you. I know right now you detest her for this but that is right now. Please don't let that own you. Be better. Know what you would have given. She will deal with hers. It will be ugly when she gets there
I guess grieve be angry then forgive and forget.
Take things light
I'm so sorry to hear how things are playing out 1313. It really is moving so quickly. My heart aches for you, too.
((((1313))))
1313,
I am very sorry to hear all that you are going through. I'm trying to process what my WW is trying to extract from me. I really don't understand the lack of remorse or guilt now, after her L got to her. In the beginning I think there was some there, as she asked to separate, "I don't need any of your money, I'll just live simply by myself." Now it's game on, any strategy to get an additional penny she'd deploy. Never mind she's already getting half my check.
I think in her head she re-wrote history and made me appear to be a horrible husband, to cover up her own infidelity. I just hate the fact that the Waywards no only can get away with it, they can actually abuse and take more from the Betrayed spouse. It really riles me any time I think about this, and looking at your situation I have a good idea what I'll be dealing with...
1313 and CWOL I feel bad for you both. I know it is hard to realize (and look at my date I am in the same boat) but we need to really thank our WWs. They grabbed the bandaid and just ripped it right the F off. Even though my sitch is resolved (the M is dead and buried with just a few more court docs to file) except for the kids, I still lurk around the boards. I was reading one today and the person became a registered member in 2006... 2006!!! and it appeared their sitch is continuing... (btw my sincerest prayers go out to them). In my divorce care group there is a woman in it and she has been divorced for 2 years and a man divorced for 1 but his sitch is 4 years old.
Here we are 3 to 6 months in and we are achieving closure. That is not a bad thing. After all could you imagine being in limbo for 4 years, 5 years or even 10 years. Let's face it sooooo much has can change in just a year but after 2 it is likely so much would change neither you nor your WW would even be the same person, so you would be pining for a person who no longer exists. The way I look at it is the woman I married does not exist anymore. Yeah there is a doppelganger out there but the insides, the personality, the woman I loved is no longer in that shell. I mourn the loss of that person but I am not going to get hung up on the person that took her place. So she did me a favor ending it cause I do not want to be in a relationship with this other person. Of course the way she went about ending it will be an open wound for quite some time.
The financials of it suck. Especially, if you have to give half your check to this other person!!! They are the ones that ended a good thing, yet they are entitled to be 'kept.' Yeah that is ridiculous! What they should be entitled to is the clothes on their back and nothing more. Yet we cannot control that and we can always make more money. Lets face it while money can provide a certain amount of peace of mind, it does not create happiness. My favorite most intimate dates with GF are not the ones I take her to a fancy restaurant and wine and dine her. No my favorite are like last night where we just sit at her kitchen table and hold hands and talk. I get to see her interact with her boys and realize what a special person she is.
I guess my point is this... look at the bright side. You can still love and be loved, you can still make more money, or get by with what you have (even though that really $ucks) but you cannot replace time. You cannot undo the time wasted waiting for someone who no longer exists. And while it is noble and honorable to fight for your M, sometimes it is just over and not meant to be. At that point you need to work on you and find your happiness!
BTW I have not asked for awhile but 1313 how is your mom doing? I have not seen you mention her in awhile.
1313,
So sorry to hear how things are going my friend. D s ucks and is never easy. Continue to work on you, and be the best you can be. Hang in there.
Hi everyone,
sorry I kind of overloaded and went dark for a while. It's been extra rough, I haven't been this down for a while. Between my grief over the coming split or dissolving of assets and the WW apparently now showing off her OM as her "SO", I've been pretty depressed.
The WW "offered" to split the dog every other week, which is not an offer, but was already agreed on and only a judge needs to put his stamp on it. So, I have her right now, and am taking her to an eye specialist this afternoon as her eye has gotten worse.
I've made plans to travel with a friend to the art auction my piece is in next week. Currently with about 150 pieces, mine is in the top 4-5 current bids against some very famous competition. Don't expect that to last!
Anyway, I wonder what I've gotten myself into, because I really don't know how I'd handle it if the WW showed up there with the OM. I'm inclined to think she's still trying to keep this on the hush hush with most people except the enablers, or newer friends who've only ever seen this guy. It's not 100% as my friend won't verify until tomorrow, and then I need to get somebody in to stay with my Mom. Of course living with somebody with dementia is stressful enough without a WW piling on.
The recent correspondence has been awful too, with the WW doing her knife twisting and then getting all indignant when I finally take exception to it. At least it's all in writing.
So, sometime soon there will be some sort of "binding arbitration" for the assets. At this point, I'm no longer going to be amicable, I want it all dissolved. If she wants to call this thing to an end, then I don't want her to have any souvenirs of her victory. Very sad.
Sorry to hear that 1313, at least you are getting to see your dog and yes there is absolutely no reason to be a doormat for her in settling the property. She cheated and thus deserves the minimal entitled by law. At least that is my feeling.
Your WW is not the only one parading around an OM. Mine is also posting pics of her and OM on FB from what I understand (people have been asking me about it). Unfortunately for her it has caused a backlash. People who I do not even know have contacted me and asked "she left you for that?" I just respond it appears so and keep doing what I am doing.
Keep in mind it is them that in the long run is going to regret their decisions not us (we mourn in the short term). The sooner we finish our mourning (and I guess everyone is different) the sooner we can move on to happiness and the realization that this just may be a good thing, so do your best not to hang on to what was, and look forward a life of possibilities.
1313 my thoughts and prayers are with you buddy. Keep on keeping on.
1313,
Sorry to hear about what's happening with your D. What you are going through is exactly my biggest fear, the permanent and irreversible damage the process does on our finances and relationships. I don't think my WW is thinking about that, she's just going full-steam ahead. But one day when the damage is done, it'll be too late to take things back.
1313,
I feel for you. I am trying to stay strong and not give my WW everything also. I know nothing about what she does since she is so far away but I am sure her sense of entitlement to things keeps her going. I am struggling an mourning my D also and doing everything I can to hang in there and be strong for my boys. I pray that all our WW's will eventually feel the loss of their family and H's.
Thanks for the wishes everyone, I really appreciate it.
While I vacillate in the resentment department, I suppose I keep slipping into denial. I keep thinking the best of the WW, and that the things I hear are true when they're not. She's just living a double life.
I'm at a point where I think I will just tell anybody who will listen that she's been having an affair for over a year. I'm also not going to pull any more punches with her. She probably thinks she's got me completely fooled, as she just has fed me more lies since the lines of communication opened again.
If indeed we both wind up going to this art auction, I'm going to make sure she's more uncomfortable than she ever dreamed of. Everybody there will know exactly why we're separated. Enjoy the fruit moral bankruptcy brings, WW. She insists it is about "us" when it's not. It's about her. I'll keep the focus where it belongs.
Update, I had to take the dog to an eye specialist yesterday. I had to explain why it's gone so long, apparently the WW was ignoring this for a month or more. The poor thing has partial facial paralysis. So, she can't close her eye or blink, so the eye is suffering greatly. They had to give her a light sedation (she has a bad heart) and stitch the eye partially shut. A variety of meds need to be administered throughout the day, and she needs to remain indoors as much as possible.
So suddenly, the WW says "keep the dog" because I will be able to take better care of her. That basically came when I said she needs to stay indoors and get these meds. That tells me that she's wanting to go to this auction next week, and the dog will cramp her style. I told her I had already made plans, and had expected to do the hand-off Sunday. But she says all this garbage about her schedule not being hers, yada yada. I got so angry I fired back "so, useless boyfriend is useless?", and to worry about herself as she usually does. I'm so over this stuff.
She answered back "what do you want me to do?", to which I replied "it's pretty sad if I have to tell you". 180 DB, but I don't care. I'm worried about myself, and the dog. If she's so concerned with her social life, I'll stay and take care of the dog. Somebody has got to be responsible. It's obvious she's neglected the poor dog for months. She's 3 lbs overweight, and that's a huge strain on an enlarged heart - it affects her breathing. Just pathetic.
Anyway, if the paralysis doesn't resolve itself or we don't find a root cause, it's possible she may lose her eye. I'm not sure how that could work as they really can't sedate her without a huge risk. Then again, I guess an infected eye is a huge risk. This is all so very sad, she deserves a better fate.
1313,
She's given up you, the dog, some money, all for a fantasy.
It's tough to take.
You have done awesome so far. You wanted the dog - you won!
You're going to win at life - can you feel it? The hope? Find the sun shining.
Be grateful for your mom, having the dog, your possibilities of an awesome future. You control your ship, your WW does not. Her ship is packed with explosives, and the fuse is lit. Get as far away as you can. You need the space to heal, but also from the collateral damage. Make sure you're financially as separated as you can be. I don't see this ending well on her end. I see you winning, probably without her in your life.
trumpet, thanks for the pep talk.
I've going to cancel the trip I had planned (for 2 months) to go to the art auction. Just 4 days out of this prison to GAL, have fun and do something, anything. The WW said she had worked out taking the dog to the vet during the day - I couldn't believe it. What she really meant was that she also had plans to go down to the art auction, and was going to board the dog. In a hospital.
Sick.
I did send one more scathing text, I was so disgusted at her and the OM. At this point I no longer care - there is no way a single human being could be more self consumed. It really is like a 16 year old with too much money and power.
So, somebody has to be a responsible adult. The poor little dog is getting old, and no longer fun. I think the WW should just get a puppy she can show off and carry in a purse or something. I'm mostly upset that the WW (I have other terms for her now) is so concerned with being off, traveling and playing.
Sandi is so right.
1313,
Any updates on your situation?
1313, are you still here???