Do you think she is healed from what happened 13 years ago?
This is a very valid point that I think about often. And I agree with you, that would be very hard to forgive and forget, as they say. I find myself allowing that to be the justification behind whether she has sex with another man and doesn't care how it affects me. So to answer your question, no. And with all that is happening I think it brings those feelings back even stronger.
Ok friends, a quick one before bed. Now, keep in mind a few days prior to my first post there was less tension and no arguing or questioning. Then I started really following the rules (some I already had been unknowingly doing). But, I really feel an improvement in myself and the things I think about in my down time and I've kept myself pretty busy today and yesterday. No text initiations, only replies (although I did have to ask her to pick up one of the kids). Been keeping it super positive at all times which makes me genuinely smile a lot more and much happier with the kids. Really been prepping for the RC fest coming up this weekend. It's the biggest one all year. I'm camping ALONE (well, a friend asked if he could stay in the camper), but I will be with all my buddies all weekend. Much needed? F**K YESS!!! On to W behavior lately. As I said she rubbed my back night before last when I was in pain. She has been a lot more talkative about her day and seems to start conversation more often (probably because I'm not around anymore looking like at her like a lost puppy dog). I was getting in the cabinet and she touched my hand in a completely non accidental way today and has been more "around". It really is hard not to fall into enjoying it and allowing myself to be vulnerable but I swear when things get gushy... BOOM! I think of the rules. So it has been very pleasant, no arguing or discussing any of the no no's. Minimal conversation starting, but not being rude. I can't wait to see where I am in a month. I am picking up the DB book tomorrow at the book store and can't wait to read it this weekend. I'll keep you all posted and thank you again for all of your support. It means sooo much!
As I said Kels, in my last post in your thread, be very careful how you read this. In my sitch, on 12/26 I felt like things were so much better because for two days she had been very affectionate. But she insisted it was over through it all, and the minute I started to act less pathetic and sad she pulled back.
WASs are very much into temp-checking, and likely that is what she is doing. WASs want control and power over the LBS because then they can keep the benefits of the R until they are gone. When the LBS starts to detach it can cause the WAS to start trying acting in way to try to keep the LBS attached. That is why you believe nothing they say and only half of what they do.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
