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Cali08 Offline OP
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So here is my next question? Should I let her know I'm coming or just show up? If I tell her I'm coming she could obviously tell me not to and then if I do.... well there is that. Is the best thing just to show up and knock on the door. While I'm there, what is my goal with her. Do I try to talk at least a little bit about the marriage or am I really just trying to have a good time with her?

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Cali08 Offline OP
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Another thought is why would my wife even still want to talk to me after submitting the divorce papers. She responds to my text messages well, so I just don't get it.....

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Cali, this is where you will benefit from talking to a coach.

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Cali08 Offline OP
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Originally Posted By: OwnIt
Cali, this is where you will benefit from talking to a coach.


I was thinking of that, but honestly the first session I did gave me nothing I didn't know already from reading the site. I would much rather take her with me to see Michele in Colorado.

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Cali08 Offline OP
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It seems my wife has stopped talking to me now. I talked to her through text messages with no issues and pretty normally for two days after the divorce text she sent me, but I texted her yesterday with no response and today with no reply yet either. Not sure how to deal with this....

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What are your options?

1. Pursue her and probably push her further away
2. Do nothing and make her wonder about you for a change

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Cali08 Offline OP
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Originally Posted By: Thornton
What are your options?

1. Pursue her and probably push her further away
2. Do nothing and make her wonder about you for a change


I honestly think doing nothing is what pushed her more..... It made her think that I really don't care about her. I am also getting the feeling now that there is another guy. I am sure he pushed her to go through with the divorce too.

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Cali08 Offline OP
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The last time she didn't respond to me she had a major episode. I started thinking that and I text her and asked if she was OK and if she had an episode. She responded pretty quickly to that and said. Hi, laying down, cramps. At least I got a response. I just responded with I'm glad to hear that! I hate those things! I left it at that.

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If you keep pushing with texts with exclamation points, IMO, you are going to lose her totally.
I KNOW you think this is the problem that led to the problem, but I honestly think you are using that line as an excuse to continue to contact her. At this point, I truly believe if you don't hold back and let her miss you, you are just speeding up her decision to get out.


M-60 H-51
M-14 years
BD 12/26/16
S 1/1/17

"First the pain, then the rising."
Glennon Doyle Melton

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I have to agree with Leah.

Your best bet is to let her go.


new thread
http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2745433#Post2745433

Last edited by Cadet; 06/02/17 03:29 AM. Reason: Link
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