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How are things as you work through it.

My prayers are with you my friend.


Me 46 Former W 46
D19 D7
BD Feb 2016
WAW moves out 4/16/16
D final 6/1/2017

It's time for me to start changin' the way I look at the world......and at myself. ~James Howlett aka Wolverine
Joined: Apr 2015
Posts: 1,654
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So what can you do this weekend to inject some fun into your life?


R 25 years
M 14 years
S11 & S13
Working on it alone since Oct 2014
M in trouble a lot earlier (~2 years)
Feb 2016. 1st R chat in a yr.
Next R chat Aug'17
Still together
Joined: Jul 2015
Posts: 461
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tkdmme Offline OP
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Hey guys,

its been awhile since my last post. Things are still in kind of a limbo state but nothing has gotten worse. The W and haven't really talked in a long time. I have had a few set backs in my personal life but I just keep getting back up and starting over.

I took my 2 sons to visit my father and mother this past weekend and had a great time. My brother has taken a job in town and is now living with me. he is helping me get my house ready to sell.

As far as the W, im not sure how I feel anymore. I don't think I could ever trust her again with my emotions. So much has happened and ive been through so much pain that I don't really feel like I could trust anyone fully again. I am just trying to be happy with myself and continue to be a better dad. I am staying focused at work and doing pretty well. I am dreading the holidays. I keep trying not to focus on the future too much but the holidays are right around the corner. Im sure it will not be fun.

Anyway, I just wanted to chick in. IM STILL ALIVE.


M:39
W:40
S:10
S:7
D:12
BD:3/5/15
Separate BR:3/5/15
W moved out with kids 1/3/16
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Glad you are still alive TK - that's a start!! Sounds like you are doing pretty well my friend.....except for this dread of future events. Now then, I'm from the UK, so which are these holidays you are dreading and what can we help with there?

Pleased to hear your brother is with you and good to get things sorted with the house too.

Xx


T 13 M 7
Me 48 H 46
SS 15
BD 7.14 PA
D final 5.16 (H filed)

We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
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tkdmme Offline OP
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Hey Sotto,

Just the thanksgiving and Christmas holidays. They are never my favorite time of the year and splitting the kids with the W during this time will be difficult.


M:39
W:40
S:10
S:7
D:12
BD:3/5/15
Separate BR:3/5/15
W moved out with kids 1/3/16
Joined: Mar 2016
Posts: 1,732
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Originally Posted By: tkdmme
Hey guys,

its been awhile since my last post. Things are still in kind of a limbo state but nothing has gotten worse. The W and haven't really talked in a long time. I have had a few set backs in my personal life but I just keep getting back up and starting over.

I took my 2 sons to visit my father and mother this past weekend and had a great time. My brother has taken a job in town and is now living with me. he is helping me get my house ready to sell.

As far as the W, im not sure how I feel anymore. I don't think I could ever trust her again with my emotions. So much has happened and ive been through so much pain that I don't really feel like I could trust anyone fully again. I am just trying to be happy with myself and continue to be a better dad. I am staying focused at work and doing pretty well. I am dreading the holidays. I keep trying not to focus on the future too much but the holidays are right around the corner. Im sure it will not be fun.

Anyway, I just wanted to chick in. IM STILL ALIVE.


It is part of the process.
One day at a time.
Pick hourself up when you make a mistake.

You are on a good path for now.

Good to hear from you tk


Me 46 Former W 46
D19 D7
BD Feb 2016
WAW moves out 4/16/16
D final 6/1/2017

It's time for me to start changin' the way I look at the world......and at myself. ~James Howlett aka Wolverine
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 5,301
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Hi TK, please try not to even think about the holidays just yet - they are months away and who knows what may be happening for you at that point?

But if people start making plans, embrace them and have your own nice plans in place for the holidays. Try and expect them to be nice. Try and practice gratitude for what you do have on Thanksgiving. Yes you may mourn what you don't have, but try and also feel the joy.....but plenty of time to think about those hols later.

What nice plans do you have for Sept and Oct my friend? Xx


T 13 M 7
Me 48 H 46
SS 15
BD 7.14 PA
D final 5.16 (H filed)

We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
Joined: Mar 2016
Posts: 1,732
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tk, how are doing my friend?


Me 46 Former W 46
D19 D7
BD Feb 2016
WAW moves out 4/16/16
D final 6/1/2017

It's time for me to start changin' the way I look at the world......and at myself. ~James Howlett aka Wolverine
Joined: Jul 2015
Posts: 461
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tkdmme Offline OP
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Doing well SH. How are you?

I am Feeling a lot better about things and getting along with the W. She has been very suspiciously kind to me in past month. Im not sure what is going on with her but its better than it was.
I am at a point however that I don't want to be with her again. So much has happened that I will never look at her the way I once did. I don't know if this is natural or not. I understand that in a perfect world, our family would be together again. Its not a perfect world.
I have been worried this whole time that as soon as I was at a point that I was through, she would start to want me again. Im not saying that she does but the way she talks to me now makes me think that something is changing.

As you all well know, this situation stinks no matter where you are in the healing process.
I think a lot about the mess I was before and how depressed this made me. It was a really dark time and I couldn't have gotten through it with out you all. I am forever grateful.


M:39
W:40
S:10
S:7
D:12
BD:3/5/15
Separate BR:3/5/15
W moved out with kids 1/3/16
Joined: Mar 2016
Posts: 1,732
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Quote:
I am at a point however that I don't want to be with her again. So much has happened that I will never look at her the way I once did. I don't know if this is natural or not.


This seems to be a natural part of the process...don't get to comfortable with it just yet...

Hey, get outside of your thread and visit some other stories.
I believe you may benefit....
Swing by mine if you need anything.


Me 46 Former W 46
D19 D7
BD Feb 2016
WAW moves out 4/16/16
D final 6/1/2017

It's time for me to start changin' the way I look at the world......and at myself. ~James Howlett aka Wolverine
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