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Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 586
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Posts: 586
Oh it takes time to heal! I didn't have nearly as bad a situation as you LIM (EA, no PA) and it ended almost 2 years ago. But the lying about it only ended a year ago. I still have bouts of anger and disbelief. We went thru the phase where it was like first dating. All over each other. Then OM popped back up (his initiation, and she never replied). I replied to him, got our L to send him a Cease and Desist letter. He then devolved a lot of information that my W left out of her story. Wow what a roller coaster. Now I go round and round inside my head thinking about how deep I want to trust and commit. One day I am fully committed and a few days later something brings a memory out and I am distant. All the while she is completely committed and in Love with me, no doubt about it. It's such a mental roller coaster, I can't stand it. But time will work it out. I have read that regaining trust can take 1-3 years or maybe more. I guess it depends on the individuals and the situation. I do my best to not speak with my W about it at this point. Not worth the time to keep scratching that wound. Got to just try to let it heal with time.

Last edited by Cadet; 06/14/16 03:30 AM. Reason: Start a new thread message

Me:49 W:45
M:19 T:22
EA confirmed and ended 8/2014
S:19,17 D:9,5
Joined: Dec 2015
Posts: 567
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Posts: 567


Me: 48 y/o
W: 47 y/o
Together: > 20 yrs
BD: Dec '15, then S
2nd BD: Mar '16, then I filed for D
April '16: started piecing
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