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Sotto #2685791 06/15/16 06:11 AM
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Posts: 118
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Scotch Offline OP
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Sotto,

Very kind words! MUCH appreciated!


M:13 years
Known her for 30 years!
Me: 40
W: 38
Kids: 17, 11, 7, 7
BD: 02/07/2016
Found EA: 3/22/2016
Told of 2 PA's: 4/8/16
Got Papers: 6/15/16
Scotch #2686294 06/17/16 07:05 AM
Joined: Feb 2016
Posts: 118
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Scotch Offline OP
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Posts: 118
Retained a lawyer yesterday. Felt good to get that done. I bit of a relief.

I went for a run last night. Something I started doing a few weeks ago. I came home to find her crying and upset on the front porch. I asked what was wrong and she said our 11 year old got emotional again. I asked what he said and she explained he is upset he is leaving all his friends in the neighborhood. That sucked hearing. She said she feels terrible that she is the one causing his pain. I kept silent when she said that so the moment could sink in with her. Didn't reassure her that "he will be alright". We know thats not true. I sat and listened while she told me. I told her I felt bad for our son and that he's a really good kid.

Is this sinking in for her? I really don't put much faith in that anymore. Maybe just a brief moment of reality before she sinks back in. But it did hurt hearing because for the past few days I thought my son was doing better.


M:13 years
Known her for 30 years!
Me: 40
W: 38
Kids: 17, 11, 7, 7
BD: 02/07/2016
Found EA: 3/22/2016
Told of 2 PA's: 4/8/16
Got Papers: 6/15/16
Scotch #2686824 06/21/16 09:26 AM
Joined: Feb 2016
Posts: 118
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Scotch Offline OP
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Posts: 118
Rough weekend. Father's Day my son had baseball that went until about 3:30pm. It was at this point my W came to me and said she would not be home on Monday (taking step daughter to her college) so i would either have to take the rest of the kids to her moms that night or Monday morning on the way to work. I told her since most of the Father's day was already over, I wanted to spend as much time with my kids so I'll take them in the morning. I don't think she thought I'd take this option because she got snippy and complained that I was going to wake up the kids early in the morning. Then I heard the kids complaining because of course, she had already told them they were going Sunday night to sleep over. Great communication on her part.

When we got home from baseball, she came at me angry. I just kept calm asking why I wasn't a part of the plans before her telling the kids. She said she was making the best plans for everyone. I said no, those where the best plans for you. Then she says she is going out for the so its my problem.

I took the kids to dinner, a park and then for ice cream. Had a great time. Got home around 10pm. I texted her mom to see if it was too late to drop them off at that point figuring it would be easier than the morning. She texted me a half hour later bitching that I waited until 10 to bring them over. I was in bed already and decided to just go ahead and bring them in the morning.

In the morning I texted her mom saying I would be to her in 15 mins with no response. I got to her house and had this feeling. Of course no one answered the door. I tried texting and calling my wife. No answer. She finally called me an hour or so later and first played dumb. Then said that I didn't want them to go to her moms house (a lie) and that I and the Father and I will just have to figure it out.

This meant I had to call in and miss work Monday. I took the time to take my kids bowling and miniature golfing. Ended up being a nice day. But obviously I see how my wife is going to handle this.


M:13 years
Known her for 30 years!
Me: 40
W: 38
Kids: 17, 11, 7, 7
BD: 02/07/2016
Found EA: 3/22/2016
Told of 2 PA's: 4/8/16
Got Papers: 6/15/16
Scotch #2687220 06/23/16 12:10 PM
Joined: Feb 2016
Posts: 118
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Scotch Offline OP
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Posts: 118
So for those reading along I'm not in a good place between myself and my W. Divorce papers filed and now lawyers are involved. It would appear to me this is when "Going Dark" is put into place. I complete disconnect from her except conversations regarding the kids etc.


M:13 years
Known her for 30 years!
Me: 40
W: 38
Kids: 17, 11, 7, 7
BD: 02/07/2016
Found EA: 3/22/2016
Told of 2 PA's: 4/8/16
Got Papers: 6/15/16
Scotch #2692571 07/25/16 06:23 PM
Joined: Feb 2016
Posts: 118
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Scotch Offline OP
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Posts: 118
So things have only seem to get worse. We are fully into the back and forth between the lawyers. She is pissed because I want 50/50 and she feels I don't deserve that. She is still going out at night with OM. At this point I feel she does it partly for him and partly to try and hurt me. I've gone to where I barely talk to her. Mostly text if anything and only about the kids. I don't look at her when I'm home. I ignore her as much as humanly possible. Her and her family continue to make comments to my kids more and more behind my back.

At this point I wish I never had married her. She's is no one I would associate with if it weren't for our past. I am trying my best to remain focused on going forward and not let her know when she gets to me. I wish I could sometimes do the mean things back to her that she is doing to me. Don't have it in me though. I hope I don't get through this and wish I took "shots" at her when I could have. But I know that's only a temporary satisfaction.


M:13 years
Known her for 30 years!
Me: 40
W: 38
Kids: 17, 11, 7, 7
BD: 02/07/2016
Found EA: 3/22/2016
Told of 2 PA's: 4/8/16
Got Papers: 6/15/16
Scotch #2693102 07/27/16 09:31 PM
Joined: Jul 2016
Posts: 1,387
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Posts: 1,387
Hey Scotch, just wanted to say I read some of your recent posts. Sounds really tough. Dunno what to say. I guess I'm somewhat envious that you're at a place where you don't give a sh!t about your STBX any more. Good that you're not retaliating and taking the high road. It's probably the best thing you can do for your own self esteem.


Me: 50, MLC/WW 45
Young kids
Nov 2015: BD1
Apr 2016: BD2
Jan 2017: W filed
Feb 2017: D final
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