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Joined: Feb 2015
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Good job, be strong.


Me:49 W:45
M:19 T:22
EA confirmed and ended 8/2014
S:19,17 D:9,5
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Good job but in my opinion you need to set a few more boundaries. ... what days/times is he to be at the house and if it is not during that time he needs to find somewhere else to be. Also financial, get a budget / plan on paper and figure out who pays for what. I still suggest legal separation so he can't blow all $$$.... this way the $$ you are entitled to will be taken directly out of his check.


Me: 35 husband:39
Sons 16 and 11 from my first marriage
Twins 5 (boy/girl)
Daughter 3
Affair bomb 2/27/14
He moved in with ow 3/13/14
OW kicked him out 6/15/14
4/2016 he seeks help for sexual addiction



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Hi Anna, that sounds fair enough to me in all the circumstances. Now, I think your focus needs to be on formalising arrangements for your own surety and on encouraging him to maintain contact with the kids. Have a think about how this can best work in your and their interests. For your own peace of mind - now that he's moved out, are you happy for him having a key? What are the arrangements regarding funds? Time with the kids? and so on. I agree with Twin about a formal S agreement as you can't rely on 'goodwill' in these situations.

I understand your fear - but truly, he had gone in heart (at least for now) anyway. In the longer term, who knows? But focus on you, your family and your best interests. Be compassionate and reasonable, but firm.

This too shall pass and all will ultimately be well my friend xx


T 13 M 7
Me 48 H 46
SS 15
BD 7.14 PA
D final 5.16 (H filed)

We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
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