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Squiggy Offline OP
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Wonka - Love the vote of confidence, especially hearing it from you, who has helped me validating and STFUing. Retrouaville is definitely on the forefront of my mind. I'll explain more later in this post.

Cali - I will definitely be checking out your sitch to see how you are moving forward at this stage. What would be a good starting point?

Pigpen - I've read some of your sitch. Not much time to do more than stalking lately. Keep doing what you're doing, man. Last I saw, your W was waffling a bit. Great opportunity to step in and be the man that attracted her in the first place. I think that's how it worked for me as well.

mahhhty - It's definitely working. You'll see why in a sec. Yell at me to get caught up with your sitch. Didn't see what happened after the party yet.

I kept the exchange low key and did not promote R talk at all on purpose, holding true to what I've told her about we should sometimes just be there together without stress.

She stood close still, albeit a hair less so. I played with S5 quite a bit. Gotta get him ready for the daddy weekend, ya know. Talked with her quite a bit as well. He kept wanting hugs and kisses from her and cried a bit. I kept reassuring him he would be fine, and daddy has some fun plans for this weekend for him. I could see her getting very sad. We parted. He had been crying, but no less than two minutes later I had him laughing and smiling <--- awesome daddy. I sent her a quick text and let her know he was doing so.

W: Ok good that breaks my heart
Me: I know. Mine too
W: Gotta fix this
Me: Agreed. Take a look at that weekend thing I gave you (Retrouaville)
W:Ok

I left it there. Three hours later she starts sending me pictures she took of the exchange. An awesome one of S5 and a rainbow, a scenery one, and then one of him. Then she sent one of me playing with him.
Me: Didn't know you got that one. New lock screen!
Me: Thank you for those.
W: smile

She kept looking and waiting for another response from me (gotta love how Hangouts does that), but I created some space and left it at that.


M: 8.5 T:10
Me:37 W:34 S:6

Retrouvaille and W moves back- 7/31/15
Piecing - 7/4/15 to present
Joined: Jan 2015
Posts: 429
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Squiggy Offline OP
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This! This! This! Exactly what I feel right now!! Definitely going to read ALL the things from your threads starting in March? I believe that is when she verbally committed?

Originally Posted By: CaliGuy
Hey Toots

Ya know ... I would have to agree. During that hardcore DB thing sure you are sifting through what works and what does'nt, then you have to figure out how to just let go, allow them their journey and continue on your own.

Then as you said .. a little reconnection hits .. and as I have expressed this before I was not prepared for those feelings I locked up to flood back so hard and so fast .. it honestly flet like I was being cheated on all over again. Truth is I thought I dealt with those feelings and moved on, but in fact I simply put them in a box and forgot about them ... they were there all along waiting to come out and be dealt with.

I currently wrestle with wanting to do the work and get through these issues, and just tossing in the towel knowing I could just box them up and hide them again, would they be there in a new R? Would a new R in fact not be easier? After all these changes can W even give me what I need after all this? How can I heal these wounds that run to the core of me?



M: 8.5 T:10
Me:37 W:34 S:6

Retrouvaille and W moves back- 7/31/15
Piecing - 7/4/15 to present
Joined: Nov 2014
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Keep on trucking!


Me: 32 W: 29 T:8 M: 6 D4 S2
M - 8/2008
W is not happy - 1/2014
W wants D - 9/2014
W moved out - 11/2014
D filed - 1/23/2015
D'ed - 2/25/2015
Gave X the Letter - 11/10/2015
Joined: Jan 2015
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Squiggy Offline OP
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Wanted to add that I got a random text message today that ended up being two hours worth of chatting back and forth about lots of things. Of course I threw in some jokes that made her laugh as well. Keep doing what's working, right? Was funny that she kept trying to get back to work, and I encouraged her to get stuff done. She didn't stop and kept on and on. I'm not complaining.

Didn't talk about myself at all unless she asked something. Just listened, responded/validated, and clarified.

I'll need to start another thread after this post, it seems. Now to think of a title.


M: 8.5 T:10
Me:37 W:34 S:6

Retrouvaille and W moves back- 7/31/15
Piecing - 7/4/15 to present
Joined: Apr 2015
Posts: 1,387
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Congrats again Squiggy!!


M 39 W 36
T5 M3
BD - 1/15 Separated - Same Day
Served 9/15
D finalized 6/17
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