Blindsided and on my own (9)

[bdub]

I dont think it means you have no emotion whatsoever.
I might be reading between the lines. To ME it looks like:
1) you are dissapointed he doesnt care about you.
2) his compliments made you happy.
3)Point in the column for being his friend.

Those things make me think you are really relying on him emotionally. Detaching means his actions have little or no effect on your emotions.


Someone else jump in here pls. I am not sure you want to be his friend. I think the goal is to treat him as a neighbor / co worker. Going to the friendzone is a dangerous place. Again, labug or someone else, chime in here please.

[SunnyB]

I dont think it means you have no emotion whatsoever.
I might be reading between the lines. To ME it looks like:
1) you are dissapointed he doesnt care about you.
2) his compliments made you happy.
3)Point in the column for being his friend.

Those things make me think you are really relying on him emotionally. Detaching means his actions have little or no effect on your emotions.


Someone else jump in here pls. I am not sure you want to be his friend. I think the goal is to treat him as a neighbor / co worker. Going to the friendzone is a dangerous place. Again, labug or someone else, chime in here please.

1) I am slightly disappointed he doesn't care about me. But that's more of an observation than a heartbreak. Information to file away. I had friends texting me every day last week, asking how I was. Nothing from H. I noticed.

2) Of course his compliments make me happy. Anyone's compliments make me happy. Why should he be any different?

3) Point in the column for being his friend AS OPPOSED TO being his W. Important distinction. I'm not saying I want to be his friend now and R later. To me, accepting friendzone would mean that I no longer want to be his W. And I'm saying that I've put a point in the friendzone column. But again, not something I'm going to decide today. And he certainly has no idea about any of that, as far as he knows, I intend to R, and I'm not acting like friendship is an option. Just something I'm observing in myself.

I guess it's hard to read someone's emotions. I'm not saying I'm totally detached, I'm saying I feel OK about the S. I'm being a human, going about my business, feeling normal human things. Not "OMG I can't live without him" kind of things. Because I can.

[bdub]

Yes, very hard to read emotions on here.

thanks for clearing it up.
You are gathering info and assessing the situation. I see that now.

Interesting that friends are treated better than W. Not that uncommon, but still interesting. I was very much guilty of that myself.

[SunnyB]

You are gathering info and assessing the situation. I see that now.

Yes! That's what I was trying to get across. Thank you for putting the right words there.

[Michele Weiner-Davis]

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