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kml Offline
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You might consider saying - nicely, calmly - "You know H, I notice that lately you've been very concerned about getting hold of me when I'm out doing things. You must realize that once you divorce me, you will not be privy to all my comings and goings. If that bothers you, perhaps you should rethink this affair you are having."

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scooby Offline OP
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Thanks. I have been struggling on what to do. He us so into ow ( he claims they are only friends...not). He spends like 16 hours a day four days a week with her and the other days about four. The lies are about 90% now, and they are about even dumb things. He has changed so much in six months. The affair is ea and pa. Somedays the only thing that keeps me here is the kids. The only commandment left for him to break is murder...ugh.

Now he is getting mad because he thinks I am texting all the time. I am blogging though...LOL. I am now being accused of an affair. Joy!! I did not realize how controlling he is until now frown

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scooby Offline OP
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H is having a tough time BC I am a homebody. I told him the kids and I are getting out BC I need the freedom. I cannot believe he will keep calling or texting when I don't answer. Also calling friends when I don't answer. This is off the charts right? Did any of your spouses get this crazy? Yes he usually calls in afternoon and then we talk before kids go to sleep. But if I don't answer leave a dang message. It means kids and I are having fun.

I feel bad that I am laughing that he got upset. Two nights in one week same behavior. He is also accusing me of an affair...LMAO. Apparently me blogging on phone looks like texting...ha ha

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scooby Offline OP
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Kml


Live, love, love what you said. He still is saying no affair, just friends. I wonder how he would feel if I had a male friend I spent all my time with? Today he is on my dumb arse list...LMAO

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AJM Offline
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I haven't read your entire situation. I assure you it's no laughing matter what he's going through, but honestly if you didn't laugh at some of it, you'd be the one to break that last commandment wink

That struck a chord with me. I remember having those thoughts with my ex - was there a commandment she didn't break? I don't know how she treated her parents and she wasn't arrested for murder, so I'm guessing there's a few..

Quote:
Did any of your spouses get this crazy?
LOL. You should really read the archives at some point. You'll find that crazy is a subjective term. You may also find that there are far worse out there than your H smile

Try not to feel bad about the way you feel. I remember feeling bad when my ex left. I felt bad because I was relieved she was gone. I felt guilty about feeling that way. Go figure...

And yes, the controlling part is a pain. But if you think about it, it actually does make a little sense - I mean, if your world was falling apart at the rivets wouldn't you try to control what you could? I submit that many of us do exactly that when the BD is delivered and then spend a lot of time learning not to control anything but ourselves.

Peace,
AJ


"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK
Put the glass down...
"Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world
Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
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