I'm in, Wife's Out - Pt. Two

[trc2009]

W has been a couple weeks into her new job and we're all starting to settle into a routine a bit. So far it's been a very good thing. Instead of her staying up until 1-2 in the morning watching TV and texting her friends about God knows what, she pretty much crashes around 9-10. It's pretty clear already that she needed this job badly. Not from a financial standpoint but she fully admitted that she was in her own head. Basically, having too much time to think.

Her and I have been pretty good. We've been getting along very well, we've handled her going back to work transition very well and it seems to be having minimal impact on the kids. Let's hope this continues.

The affection is sparse. No kissing or sex. But there is at least some physical contact. I'm sure every couple who is piecing is different in the physical stuff coming back to a marriage. We've been living together again for a couple of months and I can say things have been very good the last 4-5 weeks or so.

I try not to be too concerned about the physical stuff because obviously that's not all of what a marriage is about. We've done so well with some of the other stuff over the last month or two that I'm trying to focus on the positive of that instead of worrying about when the affection will start again. I guess that happens when you become sex starved!

[gogofo]

Good to see you are progressing with your piecing. I too feel for you and the physical intimacy. In my situation it seems like I have to dig out of a hole and then progress to the physical aspect of the relationship instead of starting at square one.

Keep staying patient and in time it should come. My W and I are currently piecing too. We have been kissing, hugging, cuddling and even ML twice over the last month. But unlike your situation, we do not live together. I spend the nights there different times during the week and we spent a long weekend together out of town as a family, but don't currently cohabitate.

The physical should come around for you with continued piecing efforts. I notice my W getting more and more comfortable with me as our piecing progresses.

I am happy for you and your W that you are piecing.

[Anders]

It sounds like you two are really making progress and great to hear you are staying positive!

It can be hard with having no physical affection, especially if your love language is touch but it takes time. Remember that is is her timeline as well.

The frustration at how slow things progress can be overwhelming. Celebrate the small successes but avoid the temptation of jumping the gun too soon or reacting to the frustration.