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MrBond #2476259 08/06/14 02:55 AM
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Beersha Offline OP
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I found some photos on the computer. I asked him about them and he said it was over, didn't last long, he was very sorry and it was wrong. He has blocked her on all social media etc too. i believe him. he even said he would talk to a priest who has been helping me, although he hasn't.

He came home and moved back into the spare room. When I discovered the photos he said there was no point trying to save our marriage, he had killed it. I told him this wasn't true, as I was still here, and I am more than able and willing to forgive. And we had some more conversations about possibly moving forward. , I was tentatively suggesting we spend some time together with out the kids, movies etc. He started to put up walls again, and then last night i ruined it all.
He says he doesn't love me, hasn't for a long time, only married me as a way to force himself. Says he has been trying for years, and is done. When i asked why he never said anything, he said, what would have been the point? I said well now i know the issues, please give me a chance to try with you?! He just says no.
He flips and changes. He says he wants to split but wants me and the kids to stay in the house (Which i can't afford alone), he wants to see them whenever he wants, he wants things to stay as they are really. When i point out that it can't work that way, he says fine. you wont get a cent more than what i have to give, and if you try to take the kids to where your family live 4 hours away,(i have no support network where we live), i'll fight you in court. And then he said the only reason he came home was his lawyer told him to. And with that he left the house, saying this is why it will never work.


W 31
H 29
DD 5
DD 4
DS 20 months

Together 10 years
Married 2 years
Bomb 1/6/14
Beersha #2476265 08/06/14 03:04 AM
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Sounds like he's withdrawing from ow.

He's all over the map, it would be very frustrating. Mines still Mia. We have the same bd.


M 46 h54
Both married before
T 11y
Bd 2/14 I must see where ow leads!
Ms 18 hs 26
Ggrass #2476277 08/06/14 03:29 AM
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Beersha Offline OP
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Oh i am struggling so bad today! Its almost worse knowing exactly where i went wrong. My biggest mistake was allowing myself to have expectations. I had dropped any, i had pretty much resolved myself to the fact that this was happening, and i just had to get on with it.
I feel like I'm back at day 1 again now


W 31
H 29
DD 5
DD 4
DS 20 months

Together 10 years
Married 2 years
Bomb 1/6/14
Beersha #2476278 08/06/14 03:31 AM
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It's a process and we all backslide, nearly everyone.

Your a human. Move on don't wallow.


M 46 h54
Both married before
T 11y
Bd 2/14 I must see where ow leads!
Ms 18 hs 26
Ggrass #2476365 08/06/14 01:03 PM
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Beersha Offline OP
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Hi all.

Sorry about my freak out earlier today. I feel much better now. Im almost angry at him about the whole situation. But we had a brief interaction earlier this evening, which wasn't as bad as I expected. I picked myself up and carried myself as if. He was ok, polite, almost friendly. He hasn't said he is leaving the house again, which I hope is a positive. W


W 31
H 29
DD 5
DD 4
DS 20 months

Together 10 years
Married 2 years
Bomb 1/6/14
Beersha #2476371 08/06/14 01:23 PM
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 12,602
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"He has blocked her on all social media etc too. i believe him. he even said he would talk to a priest who has been helping me, although he hasn't."

He's lying to you. Tell him that in order for the two of you to heal again, you need to feel safe with him. Tell him that safety is important to you and that the first stop is TRUST. Tell him that you would like a transparency plan whereby you can check his messages and emails at any time.

He has to EARN your trust back.


M-43 W-40
2D - 9 and 5

Emotion, yet peace.
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet a new life.

RECONCILED AND WISER
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