NOTICE: In order to help the OnLine Community run more efficiently, we will be pruning the boards over the next few weeks. If there are any Topics or Posts you want to keep, please save them soon.
Page 12 of 12 < 1 2 ... 10 11 12
Topic Options
#999155 - 04/03/07 03:15 PM Re: More Nuggets of Widsom from the Veterans! [Re: Jamesjohn]
Jamesjohn Offline

Registered: 11/21/00
Posts: 8334
Loc: The GREAT Pacific Northwest
From DB Coach Laurie


During this difficult time, you may get many opinions (from your attorney, family, friends, us, etc...) which can really get confusing. So, please remind yourself what your R goals are first of all. What do you want to see happen between you and your W that is realistic and a bit hopeful during these next few weeks? (Possible example: I would like my W to be less angry with me.)

Then, once you remind yourself of that, ask yourself what kind of behaviors you can show that would HELP move your R forward with your W? (Example: I want my W to be less angry toward me and it seems that my being around her, calling her, asking her to dinner, etc., gets her hostility up, therefore, I need to have a lot less contact, possibly no contact at all and will not pursue asking her to dinner, movies, etc., with her at all for the next two weeks.)

Is your goal D or is it improving your R? Those most likely are two different goals and will determine two different sets of behaviors from you, I believe. So, please decide which goal you are striving for first and that will determine what you should do, OK?
Laurie Divorce Busting Relationship Coach

Read about Divorce Busting® Telephone Coaching here!

#2100692 - 11/04/10 12:35 AM Re: More Nuggets of Widsom from the Veterans! [Re: Jamesjohn]
Tia Offline


Registered: 03/11/99
Posts: 4748
Loc: Hawai'i

Page 12 of 12 < 1 2 ... 10 11 12

Moderator:  Tia, Virginia 

Save Your Marriage! Schedule Online

Schedule a phone consultation with a Divorce Busting® Coach! Call: 800-664-2435 or 303-444-7004