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#2841983 03/15/19 05:51 PM
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Last edited by Tryhard; 03/15/19 05:52 PM.
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Thanks AS , I do need to get better at the validation part . I was caught off guard. My boundary will be “ I am not going to live with someone who is actively involved with someone else , if it continues from here in any form then I will arrange for the sale of our house and for us to separate fully . “ I do mean it and I want to ensure she understands it fully . Fixing the house up had many benefits, increased the value , occupied my mind and after a good job done I always feel a lot better and stronger.

So she said she was going to go and stay the night at her cousins, yeah right . I encouraged her and say she should as I am sure she has been stressed recently. She said her cousin would only respond when she felt like it so it is up in the air . I said cool , I am going to go and do some shopping and maybe meet up with someone later. So I guess I have to judge the timing of the boundary soon .

I feel a lot better and I can only win each way tbh . If she’s lying, then we are finished, if not then lots of dbing for me to go . There is a good chance she is just stringing me along until she can be in a better position, we will see .

Last edited by Tryhard; 03/15/19 06:08 PM.
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Anyone have any idea when to state the boundary? We are going out for a meal tonight and SD is staying out . I don’t want to say it at the time if she chooses that path . Tbh she does know it although badly stated.

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So the game is afoot , she is stalling me , maybe testing me , time to man up and accept the truth, she has gone . I guess it is a battle of wills , why does it have to come to this , world don’t like game playing, I am very close to throwing the towel in , I am worth more than this . I guess she is setting me free , kinda funny when I have been trying to do this for her , us humans are funny things ....

Last edited by Tryhard; 03/16/19 01:20 AM.
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Why play this game , Release me , do what you need to do , let me be free and stop holding me as the demon in your live . Throw whatever test you need I will pass , but eventually you will kill my love with your absurd behaviour, I deserve better than you can offer , we are getting close to the end of the road , when you have killed the last vestibule of love then you must own the consequences, you will lose someone you won’t find again and I won’t do rewinds . I know this won’t make sense , but I am just venting and will stay on the dB path to a greater me smile

Last edited by Tryhard; 03/16/19 01:32 AM.
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Who can clear my fog to the truth , I am confused beyond reason , I understand I am under the microscope but I am only human and I have my limits , any weaknesses and I lose I guess

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There is a game being played on me and I don’t know the rules . I guess I just carry on and wait .be patient and not let the hurt back . Do I just let her carry on , I am sure she has just gone deep undercover with her antics . I assume that it will be midweek now

Last edited by Tryhard; 03/16/19 07:37 AM.
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TH,

Affairs are like an addiction it's like trying to give up crack. She doesn't fear losing you so she has no reason to give up the pipe.

LH19 #2842107 03/16/19 04:12 PM
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We had a great night had dinner went for a walk , she had some wine I had cola . We had fun and a laugh. We are spending a lot of time together. She wants to go out again later today . Currently I am a bit nervous around her , this has to stop . I need to detach, any pointers anyone on the best way. 4 weeks in and it’s still hard for me

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I should explain the title of this thread . It is from a movie (I love movies ) with Sean Penn and Susan Sarandon , I also read on one of the posts as if you consider you are dead already that’s how soldiers fight best and that’s how we could consider thinking.

I am still on a rollercoaster, but I need to fix myself and refocus on myself. I am determined to do the right thing. Continue the gym , taking care of myself and not obsessing about what could be going on . I seem very adverse to any sort of adultry type tv or movies or stories . I have lots to keep me busy and that helps . When I am low I still struggle to eat but most of the time I can do it .

I guess I am strong enough to endure and DB myself to a better place , making sure the 180’s stick ( no drinking, eating, smiling more , not being lazy , letting the small stuff go , becoming more sociable dressing better and taking care of myself)

I need to do some more introspection and improve myself

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