ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Okay so WAW and I have been joking back and forth about sexual things over the last hour as a result of the pic she sent. Without getting too personal here suffice to say I said something to her regaridng sex that made her reply with "OMG you know too much about me LOL" I replied with "yes, yes I do!" So I'm hoping this type of banter slowly awakens her sexual desire for me now as that would make this a whole new ball game if I can accomplish that. I also want to encourage the daily texts too.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Hey AS, Yeah it was a nice exchange today. Something's going on in her head regarding me I think. I almost half expect to hear from her again tomorrow. That pic today was not what I expected to see LOL!
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Okay so WAW and I have been joking back and forth about sexual things over the last hour as a result of the pic she sent. Without getting too personal here suffice to say I said something to her regaridng sex that made her reply with "OMG you know too much about me LOL" I replied with "yes, yes I do!" So I'm hoping this type of banter slowly awakens her sexual desire for me now as that would make this a whole new ball game if I can accomplish that. I also want to encourage the daily texts too.
Good.
V
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
Thanks V...well unfortunately this time she must've cut it short because after I replied "ye, yes I do" I haven't heard back from her. So i didn't get a chance to cut it short.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Yup, I will V. Generally I'm pretty consistent with ending the convo first. Maybe only one or two times prior that I ended it. Like when she sent that kissy face last week when she found the banana sticker. I'm curious if she'll text tomorrow...and even more curious as to what reason she texts if she does! Who know now...she surprised me today.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
IH, that last comment from her is a bit of a double-edged sword. I would let things rest for a bit. Likely she caught herself with that comment and realized things had gone a little further than she was currently comfortable with.
However, IH, I do think she might be a bit horny. (Sorry if that is a bit strongly worded.) Which is why she sent the original picture likely hoping things would go where they went. I think you said yesterday that she was always pretty forward about sex and what she wanted.
This is all very interesting though, and overall I think the actions of yesterday were very encouraging.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
Hi Steve, Yes my friend I agree. There was more to that text yesterday than just making me laugh. She specifically chose to send such a pic to me. That's curious for sure. I do intend to let it rest though. We'll see what her next text is whenever she sends it. For now all's quiet today.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
IH, that last comment from her is a bit of a double-edged sword. I would let things rest for a bit. Likely she caught herself with that comment and realized things had gone a little further than she was currently comfortable with.
i agree... to me it comes across as her realizing she needs to rein it back in... which might be why she stopped responding... i think it's okay that you are not ALWAYS the one to cut it off first... i still think you are somewhat in the friend zone... to me, she seems to be temp checking... you need to "pull back," and let her want you as more than a buddy ol' pal... as more than "her ex..." go back to GAL... stop focusing on her, and yes--your certainly are focusing on her...
ItHurts, sorry about your situation. Seems like there are some positives still happening!
I just wanted to say that I read your whole situation, and it was what convinced me to join the site. Thanks for putting yourself out there like you did.
H 34 W 29 BD 3/12/18 Divorce Busted Spring 19
It is not things that bother us, but the stories we tell ourselves about things.
Well I always let thing rest...this is what I don't understand. I never initiate texting her or anything of the sort. So until she takes it upon herself to text me...as far as I'm concerned I am constantly letting it rest.
But this is another example of where it gets confusing. I have some here telling me she's "all but throwing herself at me," some telling me that there's people here who would love to be in my sitch right now but I'm going to blow it because of fear, and then there's people telling me I'm likely in the friend zone. If I am in the friend zone then my patience with her and this sitch is limited. You don't send your friend/ex husband, whom i would assume you don't want to send a wrong signal to, a pic with penises. That's insane to me. That's the last type of subject matter I would send to a girl that I wanted to be sure understood my motives are strictly friendship. She initiates this stuff on her own. I mean what kind of alternate reply would she have expected from me other than something sexual considering the subject of the pic.
I'm not playing these games with her. She's had four years to figure this out. She reached out to me and made contact again...and has been relentless in maintaining that contact all on her own. I have a limited tolerance for this friend zone crap. Sure I'd love to see us R at some point...but not at a cost of playing this friend zone game with her for months on end. I'm not getting any younger here. This is why I am so tempted to just tell her next time we're together that if she wants to slowly work things out together then fine. If not and you just want me to be your pal untik either of us is with someone else... sorry, not doing that. I respect myself too much.
She wants me in her life for a reason and she's made that abundantly clear since she first contacted me after our years of silence. I just don't think she wants to eat crow with everyone, her friends, family, etc by starting up with me again. But that's her issue to figure out but I am not sitting in her friend zone like a stooge waiting for her to decide. This is her chance, there won't be another. If we don't make this work this time, I will never revisit this again. I just refuse to play this game with her. If you want to be sure your ex-husband knows you just want to be friends...you don't send penis pics to him. End of story.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
IH, I think the confusion by us and you because her behavior is confusing. Like I said it reminds me of my exGF that was hot and cold for literally decades.
Her turning you down for the concert and Vegas doesn't square with sending the pic and her behavior most of the time you stayed the night. This is why I advocated an all or nothing conversation. That's the way I wish I had handled my ex that way years ago!
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
ItHurts, I am not allowed to link other sites, but try googling the words 3 Signs That My Wife Wants to Reconcile
Maybe it will give you a different perspective.
Thanks Btrow. I looked up the site and based on that site my WAW definitely wants to R! She fits all 3 signs listed there perfectly. Just not sure how accurate those "signs" really are though.
Yes Steve, she is confusing me to no end. Obviously confusing others here too. There's evidence to support both "she's throwing herself at you" and "you're in the friend zone." I'm just getting frustrated with her. Why would she want a friendship with me that has an expiration bdate since we both admitted if we get with someone else we wouldn't be able to hang out anymore? I just don't know.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
has it occurred to you that she could be temp checking? that she could be interested but still not ready to commit? that this could be a false start? what she is doing does not seem confusing to me...
i don't see her throwing herself at you... i don't see her wanting you to take the lead... you took the lead twice and she did not follow... the concert and Vegas... those were two opportunities where she could have taken your lead... she did not...
give it time and space... go do your thing... do not be available to hang out with her as she is gardening... don't hang out with her at home, watching a movie, drinking tequila... go do real stuff on your own... when the opportunity presents itself--not today--invite her to go out and do something together... see if she accepts... but wait a bit... and as you are waiting, keep GAL...
Yeah you guys are right. I'm going to do that. Enough of this temp checking crap from her. If she contacts me to hang out again I'm going to offer to pick her up and take her wherever I'm already going, hell I'll make up a place to go last minute if need be but I'm not just hanging at her house again. I've had it. She can take it or leave it.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
IH, this reminds me so much of he behavior of my ex-GF. Initiating sexual discussions only to pull back and go dark on me for weeks at a time. I always chalked it up to her feeling down or crappy about herself, and proving to herself that she could still "have" me. Once she proved that to herself she'd disappear again.
I am not saying you are Plan B since this seems very early into all of this, but some of her behavior and words tend to lean that way.
I think your new plan is a good first step. But a straightforward discussion is still something I think you should consider at some point. I think if you do it the right way, stay aloof and detached throughout it, it could net you positive results. And then you will know for sure what she is going after.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
Indeed Steve, however I'm not concerned about the Plan B business LOL! The one guy I've seen that she hangs out with...LOL...I don't sweat at all! I have it over him so clearly! But in fairness to WAW, I don't think she has a Plan A or B, I don't think she has any plan at all. But I'm backing off and going about my business. I'll deal with her texts as they come but the next time we hang out... we're actually going out somewhere or nothing at all. I'm running this show from nowbon...not her.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
I meant a potential future BF, based on the temporary friendship predicated on one or both of you meeting someone.
In fact, I'd love to see her reaction if you meet someone else. I think she'd go into overtime trying to get you back. Just afraid of the aftermath if she were to achieve her goal.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
Oh I see what you mean. Well if either of us meets someone then it wasn't meant to be I guess. I'm not much into fate and destiny but I have recently been thinking of the timinf of all of this. When Mary and I broke up I had no idea whatsoever that WAW would contact me and that we would reconnect. It does make me wonder if maybe the powers that be meant for all this to happen...if one is so inclined to believe in that kind of stuff. Is this my destiny? Just strange the timing of it all...that WAW moves back home and then months later Mary and I have to break up. Things that make you go hmmmm...
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
I would go with artista's feedback. She had a few false starts with her H and has done this dance.
I also looked up the site about 3 signs W wants to reconcile and some of the stuff in his other articles reads very much like pursuit. There is overlap with DB, but I still think it's too cheery and optimistic rather than being more real. Also, it's salesy and I just don't like it. The guy looks like a creep too. Sorry, just my impressions.
Yeah Maika I don't put much creedence in those types of sites. Just this one and that's it. Yes I am following Arista's advice. Backing off and going about my business. When WAW texts again I'll cross that bridge when I get to it. But yes, WAW and I will go out somewhere or nothing at all.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Yeah you guys are right. I'm going to do that. Enough of this temp checking crap from her. If she contacts me to hang out again I'm going to offer to pick her up and take her wherever I'm already going, hell I'll make up a place to go last minute if need be but I'm not just hanging at her house again. I've had it. She can take it or leave it.
You got it
V
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
Good morning all. Just woke up to a text from WAW. She said a song just came on the radio that reminded her of my deceased brother. Some of you may recall that he died a year before my Mom died while WAW was in Florida. I assume I can reply with something like "yeah it reminds me of him too whenever I hear it." Thoughts?
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Good morning all. Just woke up to a text from WAW. She said a song just came on the radio that reminded her of my deceased brother. Some of you may recall that he died a year before my Mom died while WAW was in Florida. I assume I can reply with something like "yeah it reminds me of him too whenever I hear it." Thoughts?
Yeah that sounds fine.
IH, just in general you want to behave like a moderately interested 3rd party if that makes sense. Just remember the whole picnic analogy is all about YOU HAVING YOUR OWN PICNIC. In other words, you are your own person. Strong, independent, secure. If she texts then you reply. If she doesn't, who cares you're enjoying your separate life.
I may be repeating myself on this next bit, I thought I had posted this to you already but I don't see it in your last thread so it may have been when I was having computer trouble. Your approach needs to be a little different than the standard DB approach. In DBing pursuit is bad, but in pursuing a romantic interest who is NOT a WAS then pursuit is normal. Your ex is no longer a WAS. Yes she is clearly hesitant to jump back into something, but I think the interest is there. So don't be afraid to pursue a little. I think what you did with the concert was perfect- you invited her to go "along", not specifically to go on a date. She didn't go and you went and had fun anyway. PERFECT. That is EXACTLY what the picnic is all about. So come up with something you are OK doing alone if you have to, and ask her along. If she declines then don't make a big deal of it because that is just her running back into the castle. You go anyway (picnic). Ask her to something else a week or two later, one time she will decide to join you at the picnic.
Thanks a ton AS. Yeah my friend is having a surprise party for his wife this Saturday and if WAW happens to ask to hang out I'll ask her to come along. If she declines that's fine too because I will know almost everyone there and have no issue going alone either. They are a great bunch of people so there's no doubt I'll have a blast either way.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Yeah it would be a bit weird if WAW did come because WAW knows them all too so I'm sure some heads would turn in disbelief when we walked in together LOL! But yeah I'm looking forward to seeing them all...WAW coming along would just be an added bonus. Thanks again AS!
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Okay I replied to her as I indicated above. She came back with "I hope you're having a good day, I didn't mean to bring you down. It just made me think of him." Then she followed that up with "You never told me, how was the concert?"
I wasn't ready for that one as I figured the concert was old news now. Maybe she is curious who I went with after all.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Haha coy Steve? How so? What if I simply reply that the concert was great and then she point blank asks me who I went with LOL? Besides i did tell her how it was when I answered her text the morning after. So I'm not sure why she's saying I never told her how it was LOL!
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Haha coy Steve? How so? What if I simply reply that the concert was great and then she point blank asks me who I went with LOL? Besides i did tell her how it was when I answered her text the morning after. So I'm not sure why she's saying I never told her how it was LOL!
Yeah that's weird that she asked, because you did already tell her, I remember you talking about that. Huh. Maybe she's fishing for info. You might try something like "it was really fantastic, you should have gone, you would have loved it!" Would be interesting to see her reply to that.
Yeah I think you're right AS...she must be curious who i went with since it's been a couple weeks now and I never put up any pics or anything on my FB. I replied and told her she didn't bring me down at all and that it's a good thing to remember your deceased loved ones as that's how they live on. I told her the concert was amazing and it was a great time. Haven't heard back yet. I have a feeling she's going to point blank ask me who I went with. I hope she doesn't ask though!
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
i think she's trying to keep the convo going... and maybe trying to steer it in a certain direction... this is muy interesante!
--artista
p.s.--i think the idea of asking her to go along to the party--if she mentions hanging out this weekend--is a good one... it could be fun since she knows the people too... i hope she goes with you! i think...
Haha that could be Arista! I figured she'd stay away a bit longer to be honest. I was surprised she texted again so soon. Let's see where this convo goes from here. I'm not sure but I think she texts me when she's on a smoke break while at work so it may be a bit before I hear back from her.
Yeah it would be coolness if she goes with me but I was already planning on going alone anyway so no biggie either way. Of course I'm speculating that she'll even ask to hang out but my gut is saying she probably will LOL! We'll see. I'm not hanging at her house again though that's for sure. The next time we're together we will be doing something outside of her home base. That's all there is to it.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Okay she replied and said awesome and that she's glad I have another show under my belt. As I've mentioned, we always went and saw this band over the years as we both love them and they tour constantly so she knows it's kind of a tradition with me since I was a teen. She didn't ask who I went with though so far so I'm off the hook as far as that goes LOL! I sent her a video that someone shot of the show so she could check it out. What's interesting here is this band is coming close by again later this summer...I just wonder if she has designs for us to maybe hit that show? I'm probably grasping at straws with that one but I do wonder. In any event, we'll see what she thinks of the video and what she has to say going forward.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Of course I'm speculating that she'll even ask to hang out but my gut is saying she probably will LOL! We'll see.
"Fortune favors the bold". Just ask her! You're going regardless, so what's the worst that can happen, she says "no" and you go anyway.
And it's "Artista" rather than "Arista", normally I wouldn't correct a typo but you've typed her handle that way so many times that I'm thinking you have permanently missed the extra "t" in there
Hahaha oh man! How did I miss the extra "t";so many times???!!! LOL! Sorry Artista dear! Oh and no, I have no plans to go to the next concert. As long as I see them once every tour I'm good. I meant if maybe she mentions wanting to go. I myself have no plans to go again though. Sorry, I should've worded that better.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Oops sorry, I thought you were talking about the next concert...you mean the party Saturday. Got it! Guess I didn't drink enough coffee today!
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Drawbridge has been up since last contact V. After I sent the video from the concert and told her to check it out, she replied "Will do!" and I never heard from her again.
I did notice some mutual friends on FB who live a couple hours away posted a pic with WAW. I remember WAW telling me a couple weeks back that she was going on the road trip to visit them. I just didn't know when. Obviously it was this weekend as evidenced by the pic in my FB News Feed.
We both used to make the trip down to see them...in fact I myself was down there about 4 months ago or so.
But as far as I'm concerned...I'm still picnicing I guess. She's so bizarre, she spoke in that last text convo as if she wanted to start a conversation about the concert and then just vanished.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
IH - I'm with Steve if the opportunity arises then BINGO! XW will she that she missed the bus and try to halt the next on to catch up to you. Stay in control.
M51 w50 T-20Yrs M-16Yrs S15- mad at W for not trying and giving up 1 Awesum dog BD 10/31/17 separate rooms 02/08/18 wife moved out 05/17/18
Yeah I agree with you guys. Time to move on and start dating again. I'm not getting any younger here and want to find my life partner. It's becoming increasingly apparent that it's not WAW after all. But hey, I had to try right? Thanks for all the great advice here and all of you taking the time to reply!
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
It's becoming increasingly apparent that it's not WAW after all.
i don't think it's apparent... it's early in your situation... but it's best that you not put your life on hold... move on... keep on keeping on... you may cross paths withy XW or you may come across the most spectacular person of your dreams... and maybe XW misses the bus... You don't know...
Sounds like a plan to me Artista. No I wouldn't put my life on hold for WAW. I haven't dated moreso because I recently just got out of a long term relationship with Mary so I figured it was best to wait awhile and be single for a bit. It had nothing to do with WAW. She just happened to pop into the picture right after Mary and I split and occupied my only night off work for a few of those weekends. I just don't see any progression on WAW's part and I'm getting bored dealing with her and her flaking out. A friendship with her won't work long term anyway so whatever happens happens.
I'll still keep you guys updated of course if and when I hear from WAW again and if I happened to not be involved with anyone I'll still try and get her to go out and do something with me. Thank you!!
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Hi Guys, Well WAW texted me to let me know she quit smoking and is on the patch. She sent a photo of herself wearing the patch saying she's proud of herself. This is weird. Not sure why I needed to see a pic of her wearing it but that's what she sent.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Just on her arm. Not a sexual pic or anything like that. Just a typical selfie showing the patch on her arm.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
So IH at this point I think one of a few things is going on:
1) She misses your friendship and so wants to friend zone you. I find this unlikely. This is what social media is for. You can be "friends" on FacEvilBook.
2) She wants to R. While this is more likely than 1, her behavior has me questioning this a bit. Though it could be she is wanting you to pursue, something I am not sure you should do at this point. But some of her behavior has me thinking R is something she is at least open to.
3) She is horny and wants some, and you are the most likely recipient because of your history. Woman in their 40s sometimes aren't open to someone new, they want to rekindle with an old flame. I had an ex-gf pull this with me several years ago. I had to flat out tell her that I was married and it wasn't happening. She even told me at the time she was only open to a sexual relationship with someone she had "history" with. (Oh and she is married too.) To me this is right now the most likely. This would explain the contradictory actions on her part. But it also would explain the calling you into her bed, and sending you the suggestive pic.
You've probably already considered 1 and 2, but maybe not 3. It came to me while watching an old Everyone Love Raymond where Roberts XW started coming around but only wanted no string attached sex with him. I thought of your sitch and a lightbulb went on my feeble brain.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
Hmmmm well Steve I don't think so my friend. Knowing her like I do (or maybe I hshould say as I did since it has been 4 , years) I think she'd make it pretty obvious if she wanted sex. Having said that, I just don't know why she keeps contacting me. This was her longest absence yet but she still contacted me again. I don't know what's going on with her but I doubt whatever it is has anything to do with R. I just don't see any shred of evidence to support that. The only thing I'm certain of, because it's obvious, is that she wants to stay in somewhat regular contact. why that is is anyone's guess but I've grown bored trying to figure her out. I replied saying good for you congrats a few minutes ago. Let's see if she tried to continue the conversation...
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Haha well the problem with that is I smoke like a chimney LH, especially if I'm drinking, so I don't think I'd be very effective in keeping her mind off cigarettes over a bottle of wine LOL! As far as her being interested, I'm not so sure of that either. Reflecting on our times together recently I think she had em friend zoned anyway and I just don't have the patience nor desire to foster a friendship with her. I don't want to waste anymore time on her. I think if she had even an incling of wanting to possibly get back together I would have known it, or at least sensed it by now. This friendship thing doesn't interest me.
Oh and she replied as I am writing this. She said if she can do it anyone can and that she hopes I'm well with a blushy smiley. I replied that "I am well thanks and hope you are too. Good luck."
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Well we've been over that theory before LH and as you know others have a different viewpoint, including me. There was, at no time, a window of opportunity to make a move on her that would have had the desired results. It would have ended badly...and most certainly would have put the nail in my coffin. She most definitely wouldn't be reaching out so much if she knew she could have me easily. That's common sense. I appreciate your opinion that I should have been aggressive but as I said, many here in this thread, myself included, think that would have been a very bad idea. She needs to chase ME! She left me...she can chase me. If she doesn't...hasta levista baby. I'm not giving up the driver's seat by making a ill-advise move to sleep with her.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Oh and I forgot to mention that she replied to my last text with a winking smiley. I left it at that.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
If she is reaching out to you it conveys some level of interest. I think you need to call her up and ask her out on a date. If she says "no" at least you know where you stand and you can move on with your life. If she says "yes" then go out, have fun, relax, and enjoy yourself.
She did chase you. Wasn't she sending you sexually explicit texts? She is not going to strip down naked and say please take me. She doesn't want to teach you how to be a man, she wants you to know that already.
Remember IT....you are not DBing any more. I view this as dating a new women, yes you have history but that is way in the past. If you want it you are going to have to put in some effort and stir those emotions inside of her. IMO if you wait too long she will lose whatever interest she has, you will end up in the friend zone, and eventually the texts will stop.
IH - I get your point about the need for her to chase you and everything, and that maybe not making a move earlier was a bad idea - I am still not sure if it would've been.
But, the chasing cannot go forever. Friends of the opposite sex don't make harmless sexual innuendos and jokes. If you're waiting for some clear cut sign like her dropping her dress on the floor, I think you're going to be waiting for a long time. I think she will lose interest if her chasing is not yielding anything from you. For all it matters - she might be thinking you're friend zoning her.
Anyways, I think that, after all that has transpired, and the fact that you're good to move ahead regardless, you should make a move and see what happens. It may lead to an undesirable result, but you'll have an answer.
I don't see the point of waiting around too long. Life is short. You're past DBing now.
IH, I just posted something about what it would take for me to consider R with my XW:
Quote:
This got me thinking of what it would take for me to trust my XW again if she wanted to R. At first I thought "not possible", but then I wondered.
Me, I could write a book on this subject expressing many of the views I've posted about. I've reflected on it for years and have posted enough content that if I was inspired to organize it, flesh it out, and polish it up it could be a fun read.
So maybe that would be what it would take. If XW was like "I've changed, I want to make this work, what would it take for a second chance?", maybe the right answer is "Publish a 400+ page book that is pro marriage". Hey, if all it took to save your marriage was writing a book then that seems a small price to pay, right? If she can't or won't write that book, how much has really changed?
So yeah, I'm on the opposite end of the spectrum. You file divorce, I'm going to need some good reasons to open the door again. The 'friendly exchanges' would be there only to provide an opportunity for her to demonstrate a serious transformation of character. If she wanted to start dating again and implied that she regretted not having me in her life that would fall drastically short. I have no interest in repeating a destructive situation.
A texted blushing smiley face a long way from a published book. I agree, cut ties and move forward with your life. If she has something more substantial to say at some point you can always reevaluate.
Me:38 XW:38 T:11 years M:8 years Kids: S14, D11, D7 BD/Move out day: 6/17/14, D final Dec 15
Well the thing here is that every chance she got, since our first meeting a couple months back...she says things to stress we are just friends. Things like "we were young" or " we were always better as friends" or there was even one remark she made during our first meeting where, when hanging out with my Aunt, my Aunt told her that "I bet you $20 she moved back from Florida to get back with ItHurts. wAW said my Aunt replied with "I bet you $100 she didn't!" So there's been little things like that that have given me the impression she wanted to indirectly make it clear that R is not her motive for hanging out. There's things you can sense with someone when in person that simply cannot be relayed in writing here. Suffice to say I have seen MUCH more from her indicating she wants us to be friends and virtually nothing to indicate she wants R.
As far as the sexually explicit pic...it really was more a joke in my opinion. I don't think it was some plan on her part to be sexual with me per se.
However, as I've said before... should she ask to hang out again, which she hasn't, I intend to do exactly that and ask her out somewhere. I have zero intentions of hanging around her house again. So I am going to make my move and ask her out. My gut is telling me she will likely do exactly that in the next couple days. I have a date tomorrow night so that's out but maybe Saturday. Either way, the next time she asks to hang out it's crunch time for me. I am going to find out what she wants from this relationship long term. If she says friendship then I'll tell her that's not going to work and to have a good life. The games are done. I want to know where she's coming from and I'm going to find out. Either she loses a great guy that she obviously made sure to come back to in some capacity after 4 years of seeing what's really out there; or I bid her a fond farewell and close the WAW chapter of my life permanently. I'm done with this wishy washy crap from her. It's crystal clear to me that she can't stay away... so now she's going to have to decide what she's going to do about that going forward...with friendship not being an alternative for her. That's it...she needs to pee or get the hell off the toilet.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Well the thing here is that every chance she got, since our first meeting a couple months back...she says things to stress we are just friends. Things like "we were young" or " we were always better as friends" or there was even one remark she made during our first meeting where, when hanging out with my Aunt, my Aunt told her that "I bet you $20 she moved back from Florida to get back with ItHurts. wAW said my Aunt replied with "I bet you $100 she didn't!" So there's been little things like that that have given me the impression she wanted to indirectly make it clear that R is not her motive for hanging out. There's things you can sense with someone when in person that simply cannot be relayed in writing here. Suffice to say I have seen MUCH more from her indicating she wants us to be friends and virtually nothing to indicate she wants R.
As far as the sexually explicit pic...it really was more a joke in my opinion. I don't think it was some plan on her part to be sexual with me per se.
However, as I've said before... should she ask to hang out again, which she hasn't, I intend to do exactly that and ask her out somewhere. I have zero intentions of hanging around her house again. So I am going to make my move and ask her out. My gut is telling me she will likely do exactly that in the next couple days. I have a date tomorrow night so that's out but maybe Saturday. Either way, the next time she asks to hang out it's crunch time for me. I am going to find out what she wants from this relationship long term. If she says friendship then I'll tell her that's not going to work and to have a good life. The games are done. I want to know where she's coming from and I'm going to find out. Either she loses a great guy that she obviously made sure to come back to in some capacity after 4 years of seeing what's really out there; or I bid her a fond farewell and close the WAW chapter of my life permanently. I'm done with this wishy washy crap from her. It's crystal clear to me that she can't stay away... so now she's going to have to decide what she's going to do about that going forward...with friendship not being an alternative for her. That's it...she needs to pee or get the hell off the toilet.
So why ask her out? You are making the case that she hasn't expressed romantic interest. The only thing she has expressed is that she wanted to divorce you years ago.
If you weren't planning on looking her up and asking her out a few months ago, why do so now? She went from no contact to limited intermittent contact for some non-committal attention. Why does she deserve your interest?
I'm not telling you what to do, I'm really just curious.
Me:38 XW:38 T:11 years M:8 years Kids: S14, D11, D7 BD/Move out day: 6/17/14, D final Dec 15
Well Zues once again I side with you on this. All this "be a man" stuff doesn't sit well with me. I totally agree...she walked out...then she can walk back. I shouldn't have to light her path for her. The only reason I'm asking her out is to put this to bed once and for all. It's not to guide her, in fact it's not for her at all...it's for me. I want closure on this. But yes, your philosophy is pretty much mine. She needs to "be the man" here as ridiculous as that sounds. She left so she needs to work her butt off if she wants me back. If she wants sex than show it...not through vague signals that can be interpreted as friendship or not. So at heart I agree with you. She needs to get her hands dirty here...I'm not doing all the work. I've accepted her invites, I've answered her texts, and got nothing in return.
So basically I'm asking her out to find out one way or another what she wants from me so this little game of hers doesn't drag on for weeks more. No way, her time to decide is coming the next time she initiates a meet up. It's either she accepts or she doesn't. If she declines I'm done. That's it.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
if she were interested in sex, she would have made that known through actions when IH stayed the night... she didn't... she's not looking for that... if she were interested--at this time--in moving toward a relationship, she would have taken him up on the concert... and/or on Vegas... she did not... in fact, she back-pedaled on Vegas... he has not miss the bus due to not pursuing...
imo--this is about her not being sure she wants to commit... and while they are not in a DB-ing situation, they are EXES... she knows she can't lead him on and then dump him... that would be too cruel... she is hesitant because she is not ready say she can commit to him... she doesn't want to hurt him again... she doesn't want him to get his hopes up... she is not there at this time... doesn't mean she won't be there some day, but right now is not the time for her...
I do think her heart is moving towards a relationship and even sex, but her head is telling her otherwise. That is what happened with Vegas....she initially responded with her heart, and got excited. Then when her head started asking her if it was a good idea or not she hedged. think there is an internal struggle with what her heart is telling her, and then all of the things you pointed out that her head is telling her.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
Hi Guys, Well I just woke up to a text from WAW that she sent very, very early this morning. She said...
"Had a horrible nightmare please call me when you can!!"
As for as the sex thing...I agree with Artista too. I would definitely have known of she wanted sex or anything along those lines. The opportunity for that type of relationship escalation had not presented itself. As far as Steve's thoughts, I'm not sure what's in her head as far as a relationship with me goes. Either scenario is believable at this point.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Okay guys so ended up talking with WAW on the phone per her request for about 20 minutes before I had to get to work. Basically she had a nightmare that I died of cancer and my ghost was talking to her. She also said that in her dream she found out I cheated on her while we were married and that two girls were hanging all over me. She said she was so angry and that she was about to "kick one of the girl's butts" and then she woke up.
This is weird guys. What a strange thing for her to dream about! I told her it was likely from the nicotine patch. I assured her I was just fine and she talked about some memories of ours and then I had to go to work. She did still use my pet name continuously and called me sweetie when she hung up... something else she did when we were married.
What a really strange interaction this was.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Wow. One thing I've found IH, is when a woman starts dreaming about you then they are into you. It has never failed that when a woman told me she dreamed about me, that it turned into a romantic relationship if it wasn't already.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
Ithurts, I am not sure what is weirder. Having a dream like that or telling you about it. Are you sure she really had that dream? Could it be some strange way of confronting you with suspicions she had in the past? Did she ever suspect you of cheating on her?
M:46 WXW:40 T:20 M:13 D3,D8,D10 BD:11/12/16 D:12/14/16 OM confirmed 01/20/17
Admittedly Steve, I was taken aback by this phone call as I was wondering why she would be dreaming about me. I figured it had to be a good thing as I must be in her head. We'll see what happens next.
No Btrow, she knows I never cheated on her. That was never an issue as she knows full well I'm not a cheater. I do completely believe she had this dream... especially since the nicotine patches are known to cause strange dreams.
Funny, as she had told me a couple times back when we still talking post-divorce and once since we've been talking again that I would always show up in her dreams. She would say I wouldn't say anything in her dreams; that I would just stand there and watch her with a smile. But yes, I think she really had this dream. The cheating part of it I think may be her subconsciously not liking that I see/have seen other girls possibly...maybe even her still wondering who went to the concert with me. Just a guess on my part. Guess we'll see what she does next.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
imo--this is about her not being sure she wants to commit... and while they are not in a DB-ing situation, they are EXES... she knows she can't lead him on and then dump him... that would be too cruel... she is hesitant because she is not ready say she can commit to him... she doesn't want to hurt him again... she doesn't want him to get his hopes up... she is not there at this time... doesn't mean she won't be there some day, but right now is not the time for her...
Yeah I agree. I mean granted none of us know what she's really thinking, but this sounds right based on her actions so far.
So IH, it sounds to me like you are only interested in pursuing a romantic R with her, not in friendship? Part of my reformation after reading NMMNG was to just freakin' say what I'm thinking, ask for what I want. If I were in your shoes I would tell her I'd like to talk and ask her out to drinks and/or dinner, then just flat-out tell her "I've enjoyed this time together but to be honest I am looking for a romantic relationship right now and have been dating. If that is something you might be interested in then I am willing, but if you just want to be friends then I am sorry but that is not something I want or need in my life right now." If she doesn't know what she wants then tell her to let you know when she figures it out, until then you are going to keep dating others. Her indecisiveness is not your problem and should not control your actions! Force her to make a choice.
Yes AS, that's still my plan. To get her to go out. However what I want to know is why, why, why is she so peristent in contacting me? I mean just when I think she's gone for awhile sure enough some other text comes in. This most recent one sent at 6AM is particularly baffling. I mean sure, we all have nightmares at times, in fact I've had dreams about WAW a few times over recent years but it didn't prompt me to text her when I woke up from the dream and request her to call me. I just told myself it was a dream and moved on with my day.
She also seems to have an insatiable appetite to talk about old memories...almost to an excessive degree, every time we communicate. Not that I mind mind you; we had some great and funny memories...it'd just that I feel like it she was truly over me/our marriage as she seems to want to relay, I don't think she'd be wanting to constantly revisit old times and most certainly wouldn't be dreaming about me... especially the part with the two girls hanging all over me. I'm no professional dream analyst or anything but it seems to me that type of dream isn't one most girls would have about someone they just consider a "friend." I have lady friends and if I happened to dream of them with some other guy I wouldn't think much of it. I certainly wouldn't be mad and want to "kick his butt." I would be indifferent to it. The main thing is she in finding reasons to contact me every few days or so and that is a good thing. Positively identifying her motives for that is the next goal.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Hi Guys, Well I just woke up to a text from WAW that she sent very, very early this morning. She said...
"Had a horrible nightmare please call me when you can!!"
i think she made this up... i have known women to use this bad dream tactic as a way to keep in touch with a guy... the bad dream is always about a guy she is not in a relationship with--but wants to stay connected to... it's made up... usually she says, "i had a dream you died... i needed to call you to make sure you were okay... blah, blah, blah..." i do not know why we (females) do these kinds of things, but we do...
if any gal ever does this type of thing to either of my sons, i will advise them not to believe her...
It hurts this is just my instinct which is probably wrong but I feel your ex-wife may wish for you to pursue her more aggressively. It seems when you don't, she backs off, but still drops hints here-and-there that she's thinking of you.
Yes AS, that's still my plan. To get her to go out. However what I want to know is why, why, why is she so peristent in contacting me?
Well I think Artista is spot on- she is hesitant to commit, she wants to rekindle something but she's afraid she'll want to leave you again and she doesn't want to put you through that again. I mean that would be the ultimate cruelty. So she's keeping it "safe" by friendzoning you. She may think you are OK with that, but you are not, and thus my suggestion that you talk to her about it.
Quote:
This most recent one sent at 6AM is particularly baffling. I mean sure, we all have nightmares at times, in fact I've had dreams about WAW a few times over recent years but it didn't prompt me to text her when I woke up from the dream and request her to call me. I just told myself it was a dream and moved on with my day.
This is just conjecture on my part but I think she's just really confused about what she wants. Her feelings were speaking to her in the dream and that is furthering her confusion. If you give her the "let's date or seeya" ultimatum and then you go dark on her, that may very well snap her out of this and make her commit. But I think as long as you allow her to friendzone you that it's going to stay there indefinitely.
I'm wondering if I should start initiating some texts to her every once in awhile. That might show that I am interested in talking to her. The only think I don't like about some of the posts here are they all seem predicated on the fact that WAW just assumes I want her back and that she can have me whenever she wants. Thus the "she doesn't want to hurt you again" type remarks. I've tried very hard to play it cool and not act like I want R but it seems you guys think it's a given in WAW's mind anyway. In other words, how can WAW's reason for not pushing more be because she doesn't want to hurt me again? From where I'm standing she shouldn't even be sure if I am open to R at all.
Other than that yes, as I said before, the next time she expresses interest in hanging out we're going out somewhere and I'm having a convo with her about where this is going. Basically telling her we can't sustain a friendship healthily.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
So V, am I to understand that in your opinion she doesn't think I want her back; instead she thinks I already know that she wants ME back?
If so, do you think I should initiate some texts to her then every once in awhile?
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Hmm interesting you have that take on things V. Everything she has insinuated is that are just friends. Interesting to think that maybe in her head she think I already knows that she wants to come back and thinks I'm aware of it too. I just don't get that vibe from her. Maybe I should start considering your POV as a possibility too.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
We know WAW was attracted to you. She M with you had sex wit you.
It's called mapping. And you have become a man only a fool would leave. Trouble is you are not pulling her. You are specifying her.
Going to her house getting drunk hanging out. Not masculine, not leading.
Do you dance? The jive or salsa or west coast swing?
Can I suggest you go for a few lessons? It will help you learn to lead and you might have fun. It is a metaphor for life. It's pulling in a real world sense.
V
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
So V, am I to understand that in your opinion she doesn't think I want her back; instead she thinks I already know that she wants ME back?
If so, do you think I should initiate some texts to her then every once in awhile?
IH, I hope you don't take this the wrong way but GOOD GRIEF STOP THIS ARMCHAIR ANALYSIS. Quit coming here and telling us what you think she thinks, and asking us what we think she thinks. NO ONE KNOWS BUT HER. What would an alpha male do in this situation? Ask yourself that, and DO THAT. Here's what I think an alpha male would do- if he is interested in her he would make that clear to her. If she does not reciprocate then he would move on to the next attractive, available woman. It really is as simple as that. Thus my advice- ask her out, tell her you're interested, tell her you don't want to be friends and if she's not interested then you wish her well and will move on with your dating.
And again for any LBS's reading this thread we're not talking about DB'ing here, this is a different situation where some pursuit and stating your wants are in order.
Thanks everyone. Well as I've said, my plan is already to ask her out. However I'd I am to continue with my picnic, that means I am not to text her. So how can I ask her out without being able to contact her? I have to wait until she suggests hanging out again don't I? If she had texted me to hang out the I would have said something like "Sure let's go to dinner at blah blah and then go see a band at blah blah." Then I would get my answer. However the texts that she's sent recently have not said anything about is getting together. So the opportunity hadn't presented itself. So are you guys saying I should just send her a text and ask her out? Again, this is here the advice confuses me. I'm supposed to be picnicing alone until she decided to come out of the castle and nibble on a sandwich. So that's what I am doing. When exactly am I supposed to ask her out then? When she sends any text at all... even one that doesn't ask to hang out. Example, should I have let her tell me about her dream and then at some point said "Hey what are you doing Friday night? Let's go to dinner and see a band." So this is where the advice gets confusing. Am I supposed to be just eating my sandwiches alone or am I supposed to go knock on the castle door and ask her out? To me those are two different courses of action here. Also V says it's too early for R talk yet others are saying to tell her it's we date or nothing because I'm not interested in friendship. Isn't that essentially the start of R talk? Maybe I'm just dense here but that's my perspective.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
