even though I'm not ready to remarry and might not ever be, I don't want to waste time on something that is never going to be "all in" at some point in some form.
I agree, as I'm going through this, the idea of casual dating is becoming less and less appealing, I'm more interested in dating with a purpose.
M - 9 1/2 years 5/5/16 - Bomb drop - 3 week EA 10/31/16 - We sold house 01/10/18 - D Finalized
Wow dude, it's been several weeks since you've updated. I know I've saw you commenting on other threads, but what about you? What's new? Any recent dates to report on? How are the meet ups going? Hope you'll give us all an update!
DonH Midwest Me 56 WAW-EXW 55 Met 11/95 / Married 5/00 Bomb 6/20/05 / She Filed on 6/2/06 / Divorced on 10/9/06 4 who'd qualify as GF since D & dated about 25 women since D
Ha, hadn't realized its been that long, I'll update when I get back to work next week, don't like typing long posts on my iPad. Things are good, living a good life, still stop bye almost daily to read updates and comment when moved to do so.
M - 9 1/2 years 5/5/16 - Bomb drop - 3 week EA 10/31/16 - We sold house 01/10/18 - D Finalized
Things have been good with me, I still hang out with the singles group, but I've only been going to one meet-up every two weeks or so, most of the time I just hang out with friends from the group outside of "official" meet-ups. Going out with the group is fun, but constantly trying to get to know new people isn't as much fun as just hanging out with friends. I also joined a meditation meet-up group and it's fantastic. So much positive energy with that group, every time I go I leave feeling so rejuvenated.
I was starting to feel like dating was becoming an obsession with me, so I stopped trying to find someone to date and just started enjoying the people I was spending time with.
I've been spending a good amount of time with GG, I no longer have any romantic feelings towards her but we get along really well and I just enjoy hanging out with her. She knows that my Dad has passed and that my son is in FL, so she asked me to spend Fathers Day with her. We went kayaking on a river in town that I had never been on and then went out for Dinner. It was her first time kayaking and she did really well, the river we went on was really small (like 20 feet wide and most of it 1 or 2 feet deep) and there were a lot of obstacles (trees and rocks) and she only got hung up twice and didn't flip.
At one point I used my paddle to splash her with water, I accidently splashed way more water than I intended and soaked her; I immediately tensed and realized that it was because my ex would freak out on me if I had done that to her, but GG busted out laughing and immediately started splashing me back.. I don't think GG would of even cared if I had flipped her kayak (except it was too shallow), and I realized that I definitely want a girl that isn't afraid to just have fun, even if it means getting dirty.
I'm loving my house, I've been living in it for about 3 months now, and it fits me very well. I'm still learning to cook with gas, definitely a learning curve there because of how much hotter it is than an electric stove. My buddy who stayed over with his family last month showed me a trick, to stack the metal grates on top of each other to raise the pot further from the flame and that's really helped when you need less heat (even the lowest setting on the smallest burner would boil water, so simmering something was impossible). My biggest challenge is with the yard, it's almost 3/4 of an acre, it has lots of mature pine trees and a few oak trees, so with all the shade there are parts of the yard where grass doesn't grow. The previous owner also had a large section on the side of the back yard that was used as kind of like a flower bed, but it's like 20 feet wide and like 40 or 50 feet long (runs along neighbors fence) that has no grass and is growing a lot of weeds. It's a challenge to mow cause a lot of dirt blows up... anyway, I prefer a natural landscape to a manicured lawn, so I'm going to try and learn about naturescapes (I think is what is called). I'm not familiar with any of the plants that grow here in NC (I always used tropical plants back in FL), but I'm hoping to find some plants that I can use as groundcover over very large areas of the yard (just something to keep the weeds from growing).
My mom, brother, two nieces and my son are coming for a visit the week of 4th of July. I've gotten so used to living alone that the thought of having 5 other people there for a week is kind of stressful, but I'm really looking forward to the visit. My son will be heading off to College in about a month, so not sure If he will be coming up for anymore visits after this, it's more likely that he will go back home during breaks and I'll visit him down there, so I'm excited for him to at least get to see my place.
ok, need to get back to work, so that's all folks.. for now
M - 9 1/2 years 5/5/16 - Bomb drop - 3 week EA 10/31/16 - We sold house 01/10/18 - D Finalized
forgot to mention, I have been looking into the KETO way of eating (high protein, low carb) and am thinking I may shift my eating habits to that way of eating. I don't eat many carbs anyway, but it will require stopping the sugar in my coffee (which I love) as well as taking milk out of my diet. Those are the only two things I really care about. But my sister and brother in law eat KETO and love it, actually during my visit a few weeks back, they wouldn't shut up about it.
Also, ever hear of Sous Vide? I recently started cooking Sous Vide, I'm having fun experimenting with it and it compliments my grills very well. It's biggest claim to fame is taking a cheap piece of meat and making it very tender (some meats you cook for up to 48 hours) and it doesn't overcook anything, keeps it at the perfect temps. All the meat i've cooked so far has come out fantastic.
M - 9 1/2 years 5/5/16 - Bomb drop - 3 week EA 10/31/16 - We sold house 01/10/18 - D Finalized
My biggest challenge is with the yard, it's almost 3/4 of an acre, it has lots of mature pine trees and a few oak trees, so with all the shade there are parts of the yard where grass doesn't grow. The previous owner also had a large section on the side of the back yard that was used as kind of like a flower bed, but it's like 20 feet wide and like 40 or 50 feet long (runs along neighbors fence) that has no grass and is growing a lot of weeds. It's a challenge to mow cause a lot of dirt blows up... anyway, I prefer a natural landscape to a manicured lawn, so I'm going to try and learn about naturescapes (I think is what is called).
Coconut,
I have some of the same yard issues. I have a lot of shade in my front yard and backyard. My backyard is mostly natural, but I'd like to make it more of a lush garden; not necessarily manicured, but lush with a variety of plants (and a gazebo).
I've found a lot of interesting gardening and yard info on YouTube. One of my current favorite channels is "Garden Answer." It's a husband-wife team; the husband is the cameraman and the wife narrates. They have some really good garden tours that I enjoy watching. Something else I'm researching is natural ponds/pools. I'd like to have a water feature (not a tiny pool of water), but I want something that looks natural rather than having the typical pool.
thanks for the suggestion D, I've starting watching the Garden Answer segments and have enjoyed them. Watching Laura kind of reminds me of the first time I saw Rachel Ray cooking on TV, great personality and I enjoy the short stories that she diverges into about the history of the plants while showing them, similar to Rachel's stories about her recipes.
While I initially thought it would be a waste of time since they are in OR and I'd be surprised if many of those plants would work in my area (although I don't know that for sure it is a lot warmer here), the garden tours have opened my eyes to the benefit of breaking up my yard into smaller "rooms" with plantings..
So it will be helpful to be thinking about that as I start my initial plantings, maybe i'll even sketch out a rough plan for the back yard, and identify good areas to have "rooms".
M - 9 1/2 years 5/5/16 - Bomb drop - 3 week EA 10/31/16 - We sold house 01/10/18 - D Finalized
My mom, brother, two nieces and my son are coming for a visit the week of 4th of July. I've gotten so used to living alone that the thought of having 5 other people there for a week is kind of stressful, but I'm really looking forward to the visit. My son will be heading off to College in about a month, so not sure If he will be coming up for anymore visits after this, it's more likely that he will go back home during breaks and I'll visit him down there, so I'm excited for him to at least get to see my place.
So the family is gone My mom, brother and nieces left Friday morning to drive home, and my son stayed until Sunday. It's funny that as much as I enjoy having people over and love spending time with my family, I really was anxious about going from living alone to having 5 other people in the house, not really sure why but I was. Anyway, it was great, I forgot how much I missed always having things going on in the house, always having people around to talk and laugh with.
We had a really great time, I avoided the normal touristy type things and opted to show them how I live, so we spent a lot of time on the water. I took them kayaking down the river that I went to with GG, and that was great. We had the river to ourselves, and it was the first time that my nieces had kayaked by themselves, and while they were nervous they did great. I took them to a bigger river that is real low right now, so we waded in the river and played in the rapids, we were actually able to find a couple of "chutes" in the rapids that we were able to ride like a water slide,my brother, my son and I ventured across the river (it's about 200 feet across) and basically just went exploring the other side of the river. Playing in a river like that is something that none of them had ever done before and everyone really enjoyed themselves, it was nice to be able to share that experience with them.
After the rest of my family left, my son and I had some time to ourselves, and it was a real bonding experience. We had some pretty deep heart to heart talks, he told me how much he misses and loves me, that he is so happy to see me doing so well and told me that he didn't want there to be any confusion, and that in every way to him, I am his Dad.. He is also having R issues, which I believe stem from his g-friend being upset that he is about to move away for school (they talked about trying long distance), so I talked to him a little about boundaries and validation.
It was just an awesome week and I couldn't of asked for more.
M - 9 1/2 years 5/5/16 - Bomb drop - 3 week EA 10/31/16 - We sold house 01/10/18 - D Finalized
After the rest of my family left, my son and I had some time to ourselves, and it was a real bonding experience. We had some pretty deep heart to heart talks, he told me how much he misses and loves me, that he is so happy to see me doing so well and told me that he didn't want there to be any confusion, and that in every way to him, I am his Dad...
After the rest of my family left, my son and I had some time to ourselves, and it was a real bonding experience. We had some pretty deep heart to heart talks, he told me how much he misses and loves me, that he is so happy to see me doing so well and told me that he didn't want there to be any confusion, and that in every way to him, I am his Dad.. He is also having R issues, which I believe stem from his g-friend being upset that he is about to move away for school (they talked about trying long distance), so I talked to him a little about boundaries and validation.
And that is awesome too, Coconut, being there for your son. Great!
WW H(me): 53 W: 48 T: 27 M: 22 S: 18 Piecing since 03/2016 Saw the light in the storm
My mom, brother and nieces left Friday morning to drive home, and my son stayed until Sunday. It's funny that as much as I enjoy having people over and love spending time with my family, I really was anxious about going from living alone to having 5 other people in the house, not really sure why but I was. Anyway, it was great, I forgot how much I missed always having things going on in the house, always having people around to talk and laugh with.