Wow Steve85, you are spot on with my W and here reactions. after I responded to her wanting to know how I want to be served D papers she sends a text OK. Then about 20 min. later she sends a text that says Sorry. She is feeling soo guilty and I want to talk R with her but I know I should not. What I will do is tell her I don't believe that this is not the solution to our problems, however, I love and respect you enough to let you go. It makes me sad that you feel so bad about us, our marriage.
---------------- Me-53 W-50 T-16 M-13 Bomb drop 1-16-18 Discovered EA 1-23-18 Discovered PA 2-2-18 Still involved with OM WW moved out 3-29-18
You can let her know you disagree with the decision and the part about loving and respecting her enough to let her go is good. DO NOT ADD THE "it makes me sad".
Instead say, I just want you to be happy no matter what that means.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
No. Do not talk about emotions. Your action will speak louder than your words. Plus sad is not the image you want to give her. I would leave it at "I just want you to be happy."
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
This having paperwork drawn up has really gotten to me this afternoon. It seems like this is moving so fast and there is nothing I can do about it. I am losing faith in the process. Trying to read major chapters again. Need a good kick in the pants to make me remember that it isn't over until I decide it is over. Just figuring out ways to influence once she moves out. Other than waiting on the final decree the only thing we will have to connect us is the animals and common friends. Which at this point she has ignored.
---------------- Me-53 W-50 T-16 M-13 Bomb drop 1-16-18 Discovered EA 1-23-18 Discovered PA 2-2-18 Still involved with OM WW moved out 3-29-18
Got my first positive reaction to the TLR detaching. My W decided to leave for the weekend and I replied that we wouldn't talk until Sunday. Which she replied what did you want to talk about. To which I replied I don't know , we still need to communicate. She replied Yes, Yet, you left Wendsday without a word. and came home late afew times with no word. I told her I was trying to take care of myself and do what I meeded to prepare for life without you. her response was sorry for that me leaving might that. I am sorry for what this has done to you. so I did get to her as far as where are you going or going home.
---------------- Me-53 W-50 T-16 M-13 Bomb drop 1-16-18 Discovered EA 1-23-18 Discovered PA 2-2-18 Still involved with OM WW moved out 3-29-18
Guys I think I screwed up with my text reply I gave her too much information didn't I . I probably just blew my chances of another response by being less forthcoming about what I'm doing and where I'm going. Anyone have an opinion.
---------------- Me-53 W-50 T-16 M-13 Bomb drop 1-16-18 Discovered EA 1-23-18 Discovered PA 2-2-18 Still involved with OM WW moved out 3-29-18
You can imagine BD like a slow motion bomb explotion. And you are in that room. You are in the air, you canīt control what is happening and you are being lifted from earth surface... Just wait for the calm after the explosion. Check yourself, stand up and look around. Time is your partner now, donīt rush. The only thing you can control is yourself. Then start the DB walk.
WW H(me): 53 W: 48 T: 27 M: 22 S: 18 Piecing since 03/2016 Saw the light in the storm
I told her I was trying to take care of myself and do what I needed to prepare for life without you. her response was sorry for that me leaving might that.
Come on man. Getting her to feel sorry for you is not a positive reaction. It makes you look weak! And yes, you screwed up in your reply. Get up dust yourself off and get back at it. You just started this journey and it is going to be along (get it) long time before you see the results your are looking for.
I promise you that if you put in the hard work you will come out of this better then you have ever been in your life!
Need some help getting back on track TLR and detaching. I know I messed up in responding to W about communication as I was only into the first week of detachment. Any ideas how to get back on track?
---------------- Me-53 W-50 T-16 M-13 Bomb drop 1-16-18 Discovered EA 1-23-18 Discovered PA 2-2-18 Still involved with OM WW moved out 3-29-18
