Hi Sotto, Speaking of grateful hearts, I want to thank you for your kindness and support during my dark days. I get such a nice feeling seeing familiar names on the BB. Best, RAI
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
hope you had a great Christmas Sotto... all the best to you xox
M51 XW43 (38 at bd) BD1 MAY 30 2015 BD2 JUNE 25 2015 by text moved out Aug 2 2015 left both Daughters 13 and 15 (now 18-20) Her divorce Final July 26 2016 Last time she saw her kids Aug 2 2015
As SBJ said, Merry Christmas and thank you for helping me through my dark days.
Gordie 40s W 40s M20+ kids 2016 BD W fantasy affair w OM1 I do everything wrong 2017 I start to DB W says TLTL files for D PA w OM2 2018 I do LRT W drops filing and OM2 situation slowly improving
Thank you for being the person that you are. Your advice has helped so many over the years. You, yourself, have come a long way and are an inspiration to all. Keep up the good work!
Wishing you a very Happy New Year! I look forward to reading your updates in 2018.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Hi all, thanks so much for your Christmas messages and your kind comments - you guys are the best and I feel lucky to have found this forum in my darkest days.
I had a nice Xmas, thank you. It was mixed because my Mum, who is very frail, wasn't well from Xmas day for a few days, which was stressful and emotional. She is on the mend now hopefully and we managed to avoid a stay in hospital for her, which was good.
Around that, I have really enjoyed the festive season, meeting up with friends or family most days for different activities. I have a little time off, which is nice as it has been a busy year. I'm away dancing over the new year, so that should be fun too.
I met up with SS and his Mum as part of the festivities and we had a nice lunch together. I hadn't realised, but SS's Mum had a huge falling out with XH and now they don't speak at all. Firstly she took a dim view of him exiting our marriage in the way that he did. But the main thing, she said was his disinterest and unreliability in seeing his S.
She said she would sometimes just get a message saying - I'm away the next few weekends. These would include one where SS was due to visit. She would reply - what about SS's weekend and XH said he'd leave food in the freezer is SS still wanted to go down. I mentioned that I'm sure XH will miss SS when he goes back to the States and SS said, I suspect I may be replaced pretty soon...
His Mum then said she imagines seeing him at SS's wedding in years to come, with W no.5, who will be much younger of course. He will be paunchy and still coming across as the good guy as he likes to do. She really has little time for him at all..
They both commented on how well I seemed to be doing and we looked at some recent pics of mine from various social events. We also talked about a comment from a friend of mine that I had 'bounced back' from the D events. SS's Mum said that it's probably because they don't see you frequently and that each time they do, you have moved a long way forward. Doesn't mean that journey was easy of course.
Anyway, all quite interesting. And the best thing for me? Whilst I still find mention of XH somewhat interested, I really did feel quite emotionally detached from his life and his stuff. It's a nice feeling not to get caught up and have an emotional nose dive at mention of him. Progress for sure...
Anyway, that's it for my news. Relax and enjoy the Xmas break everyone. Xx
T 13 M 7 Me 48 H 46 SS 15 BD 7.14 PA D final 5.16 (H filed)
We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
Hi all, I'm struggling a little today and hoping someone may have some advice or wisdom to offer - nothing to do with marriages or MLC, but just a genuine struggle for me right now.
We've had a real rollercoaster time over the festive season with health challenges for my Mum who is very frail and has advanced dementia. This was compounded this week when Mum took a full body tumble during a care session with me and my Dad. She hit her head and we had to call an ambulance. Then we spent 10 hours with her in a busy emergency room where she was strapped to a trolley with a neck brace and not understanding what was happening. Luckily she just had a nasty flesh wound to her head and a CT scan ruled out anything worse. She came home that day, but not until the wee small hours.
Since this incident, which was of course traumatic, I'm struggling with mental replays of what happened and an awful feeling that we were meant to be caring for her and we caused her injury. We invest a lot of time and care into looking after Mum at home and we did make a mistake in the session which led her to fall and I'm struggling to get past that. I feel so distressed about it as she is so frail and vulnerable and unable to look after herself at all. I just can't quite seem to get past that, but maybe I'm just struggling because it happened so recently.
I just wondered if anyone had experienced anything similar, maybe with children or someone you care for and what helped you move past it. Logically I know that I do a huge amount to support my parents, but emotionally I'm struggling with what happened. I also feel some resentment towards my sister who doesn't really offer much in the way of practical support and just makes 'social calls' with my parents - not even showing up in times of great need - and of course not feeling any of this pain and trauma I feel - ugh...
Happy New Year to you all by the way xxxx
T 13 M 7 Me 48 H 46 SS 15 BD 7.14 PA D final 5.16 (H filed)
We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
