24 Mths in..I gotta whole lot of living to do now

[roist]

Best wishes for the your daughters big ceremony and night

[peacetoday]

Maybe its a moment of despair for her : with her threats

maybe she is drunk as you mentioned

Sorry your girls have to be put through this

But they do seem content to let their mom go for now-

and its nice your D wanted your new GF to be included on her special day

You may hear from XW on and off for some time to come and unfortunately there is no easy answer

either XW will step up to the plate and realize the truth and what she has created or she will continue on this way many years and perhaps get worse into addiction
nothing you can do except what you are doing and moving forward with your life letting her deal with her choices

[Sotto]

Hi Irish, I'm sorry that you are having to deal with these difficult contacts from your XW. She really is flip flopping all over the place - to go from 'I'm not going to see them until they are 30' to 'I need them to call me tonight' all in the space of a couple of weeks. She clearly isn't in a great place.

It must be tough for your girls to have the shadow of this happening when nice events are due to take place. I'm sure the event will still be lovely and it is nice that your GF will be there in support too. Your girls are lucky to have one stable parent (which makes a huge difference) and a supportive girlfriend in the mix too.

I hope the graduation goes well and that you all enjoy celebrating your daughter's achievement.

Xx

[Irish M]

Sounds like it is time for some topless Jeep therapy time.

Great advice SBJ :-)
sadly its a weekend of rain. I put the hard top on 2 weeks ago or so. But I have the freedom top where the front seat panels come off. So with warmer temps next week.. your prescription will be filled.

This is no way to undo the damage, as well you know - as any sane person knows.

Yes, it's not what I would envision as a pleasant first time meet up. D17 is already a little nervous. This threat isn't helping.

Eew has no custody rights, correct? Has the school seen a copy of the divorce / custody papers? They should all be aware of this and make sure they don't create another clusterF

xx buttrfly, Yes the school knows everything. They have told her on numerous occasions to stay away from the school. Her erratic behavior. the principle and teachers picked up on it right away. But legally she has the right to attend since she is not deemed violent or any danger towards D15 and D17.

Best wishes for the your daughters big ceremony and night

thanks Roist

either XW will step up to the plate and realize the truth and what she has created or she will continue on this way many years and perhaps get worse into addiction
nothing you can do except what you are doing and moving forward with your life letting her deal with her choices

Hi Peace xx, yes I truly hope that she will step up to the plate one day. If this will happen one day, I will be a happy man.

If she ends up deeper in a dark place. I think god the girls don't have to witness it and I wish her the best.

It must be tough for your girls to have the shadow of this happening when nice events are due to take place. I'm sure the event will still be lovely and it is nice that your GF will be there in support too. Your girls are lucky to have one stable parent (which makes a huge difference) and a supportive girlfriend in the mix too.

Yes it was a tough day yesterday and Friday night.
thanks for your support Sotto xx


So yesterday morning D17 comes to me and says she doesn't want to go. I tell her that she can't let her mother control her this way that she must live and do things for her and not worry about her mother.

In my gut the threat of my XW coming was a dead threat. Wouldn't happen. My XW avoids and is good at it. She will spew but no action. Typical here with these MLC. So the morning goes on and I can tell D17 is nervous. D15 not as much. She is venting anger towards her mom. Saying if she shows up with OM I will punch them both in the face. Now I know anger is love. If there was no love then the anger emotion would not show its face. I hugged D15 and told her that even if her mom was to show up she is to just be calm and enjoy the day for D17. no drama.

D17 gets ready. Its the ceremony. They wear gowns. Nothing is showing but the shoes. No need to wear a fancy dress because it is covered. There is no prom as it was in June. So D17 wears her comfortable jeans and t shirt. Does her hair and makeup and we go.

Outside the school the kids are going in first to get ready and the parents line up to go in 40 mins after. all the kids were dressed as if it was a photo shoot and red carpet deal. I tell D17 if she wants to go home and change she can,We still have time. She says no dad. I am good how I am. I'm going in. So she walks in with her head high amounts the fashion divas and GQ guys. I was so proud of her for doing that. She is strong

the ceremony went great. No signs of Xw and to be honest I was sitting in the 2nd row and never once looked back to scout the place. If she was there she was there. I wouldn't of known it.
Seeing my D17 get her diploma I did shed a tear. We exchanged smiles and were both at peace enjoying the moment.

and you know what. No one knew she was under-dressed for the occasion. She was comfortable and herself. They all looked the same.

And avout XW. My mom always told me. Never worry about something before it happens. It is a waist of energy because we always worry the worst and it never happens the way we think it will.

hope you all have a great day.. sunshine for the next 7 days. Warmer temps and open jeep top in the forecast :-)

[job]

I am so glad everything turned out okay for the graduation ceremony. Congratulations to your daughter!

I had a very strong feeling that your xw wouldn't show up. Why? Because they tend to do stuff like this all of the time because they want people to remember that they are out there. In many cases, they tend to pop out around special events and do and say things that put a damper on the event. I honestly don't think they can help themselves because they are so miserable that they want others to be that way too. They can't see beyond the tip of their noses how to get themselves out of their own way. I'm not making excuses for them, but it appears that she's a very miserable and lonely woman who can't or won't get help.

You and your girls are living your lives and that's what is very important. Enjoy the time you spend with your girls because those memories can't be played back at a future date, except in photos.

[bttrfly]

yay!!!!!xoxoxo congrats to D17 and your family xoxoxo
love your mom's advice ... i will remember it!!!

[peacetoday]

yes your mother had great advice!

enjoy the warmth!

[CaliGuy]

Great to hear it all went smoothly ... I can only echo what job shared and we are entering into the time of year the MLCrs do tend to all act up at once... in my house I simply say in my head GOT style "Winter is comin" .... mine too is pokin a pinkie toe out and feeling the waters lucky for me I have the hideous Holiday sweater out that says 'Been there Done that'.

Congrats Irish, Must be something else seeing your 2 Ds bond and experience such life events together and know they have each others back. Hopefully one day their mother will emerge and be there in the later years .... for now they have each other and a very strong father figure to lean on ... kudos man.

[OwnIt]

So odd that she is menacing in these threats to come to the big events. Mine acts like a scared little chicken about seeing the kids--so fearful of their rejection of him.

It is a testament to you that your D17 knows herself and what she wants and doesn't feel the need to give into the peer pressure from others.

[HaWho]

So glad it all went well, Irish. You all deserved to savor the day in peace.

Keep rollin' on, you tank!