yes, except she lost her marbles this past weekend, if you read the beginning of this thread. which is why I'm here, i feel like I'm backsliding and I don't know what my next move is.
clearte, sorry I garbled the timeline.
Sukcs, what you're going through....
But that's a good question: why DO you want her? What are positive things that draw you to her?
Me: 50, MLC/WW 45 Young kids Nov 2015: BD1 Apr 2016: BD2 Jan 2017: W filed Feb 2017: D final
It's hard, as I'm sure everyone here understands... when she's all into her phone (I presume she's talking to a guy, no real idea though) it makes me question this. It (for obvious reasons) makes me feel less, not enough. I tend to think "is whomever she's talking to THAT important? more important than her child, mom and spouse?" yes. yes. they. are.
When she's present with me / the family, the woman I married is there, she's fully there. The kind, loving, funny, caring woman I married is there. -I guess those are the moments I'm sure what I'm doing is worth it.
I used to think she was trying to get a rise out of me, I'd get mad or upset if she was just on her phone, I'd make a negative remark, now I try something new and keep my mouth shut. I cant control her anyway. But I refuse to react.
Anyone else feel like "damn I've made it another day" like it's some accomplishment? cus my day is almost halfway over and that's how I'm feeling right about now.
Anyone else feel like "damn I've made it another day" like it's some accomplishment? cus my day is almost halfway over and that's how I'm feeling right about now.
Oh yeah. I also keep feeling that I should post an update - but there really isn't one that's worth the electrons. Just nonsense and rambling speculation. I've really get to up my game and focus on things other than DB.
On BD H52, W50 T27, M26 S21, D23 BD-9-Mar-16 D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18 I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good. But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
Clearte, why don't you stand up for yourself and say, W, while we're together as a family, I would appreciate it if you would put your phone away, and I'll do the same. Let's focus on SD, and the movie/dinner/TV show -- whatever you're doing together. If that won't work, then yeah, just ignore it. But I don't know anyone who wouldn't feel bad to see their spouse on a phone when you suspect an A.
11/4/15 W revealed EA/2 months later became PA with co-worker Reconciling since late April 2016 Don't give up until it's time, then move on Be patient, strong and kind but never a doormat
Your wife could be feeling guilty when she is having fun with you and SD as a family unit. She will experience lots of confusion, and so will you. Focus all of your time, effort and energy into being the best Clearte that only a fool would leave. Detaching and establishing some boundaries are key.
You are at a very fragile point in this relationship and it would be extremely helpful to know what your next move should be. Feel free to give me a call at 303-444-7004 to discuss how we can best help you determine what to do next.
Cristy Resource Coordinator The Divorce Busting Center 303-444-7004
A Divorce Busting Coach can help you save your marriage, even when your spouse wants out.
Email virginia@divorcebusting.com or 303-444-7004 for more information or to get started right away.
Anyone else feel like "damn I've made it another day" like it's some accomplishment? cus my day is almost halfway over and that's how I'm feeling right about now.
Clearte, this is how I feel every day. There are ups and downs daily, my goal has been to try to minimize the magnitude of them. Im getting better, but I still have those days where it really, really hirts every now and then. As silly as it sounds, I find if say at the end of the day that I'm proud of myself for grinding out that rough day it makes me feel better. Almost as if acknowledging the day sucked but I worked my butt of to get through it gets me back to a good place.
Keep your head up bud and know that we are all here to support you! A long and tough road ahead of you, but just take it one day at a time!
Me39 M11 : T13 D9 BD 5/31/16 In House S until 6/21/17 Divorced 10/5/18
Oh yeah, my W is also on her phone using Facebook nonstop. Best you can do is fully ignore it. I think they are trying to get a rise out of us to validate we still care and they still have sway over our emotions. Don't even look over at her while she does it would be my advice.
I choose to be fully focused on my D and having fun whole she has her nose in her phone. If she chooses to not participate in that family time that's her loss.
Me39 M11 : T13 D9 BD 5/31/16 In House S until 6/21/17 Divorced 10/5/18
Lt0402 - yea, I ignore and look away. It still hurts. But, she recently said she was working on herself on being more “present” but it doesn’t seem like its working out for her.
Forgump – that thought has actually never crossed my mind, usually I go to bed thinking how happy I’ll be if she decides to reconcile “tomorrow” I always go to bed thinking happy thoughts.
W texted me that the kitchen sink is backing up, that she’s going to have to call a plumber…. Torn, I have nothing going on after work, I’d most likely be able to fix whatever is going on. I’d obviously like to see my D. I’m a nice kind person, I like helping.
I can’t make this decision on my own. I don’t know which way to go. She doesn't want me, she just needs a plumber. MY biggest issue is, she's calling me when she could easily be calling the plumber or someone else. This is my BIGGEST issue in this whole situation. I think if I'm kind, and she knows how much I do, she'll eventually see what she's missing. -LOST.
