Yo Pinn! I honestly don't feel qualified to give advice on what works, but I don't think you are sending out any red flags at all. Keep that patience up and keep doing what you are doing- slow and steady (and I think the general consensus is- if you think you are going slow- go slower). If she pressures you, don't take the bait and react too quickly. She's still the skiddish squirrel that you are trying to get to come to you.
Overall I think YOU are doing great. I'm proud of you for the progress that you have been making. What a difference a year makes, right? Just keep being awesome. You'll end up on top- I just know it! As for your WW.... Again only time will tell if she has made any changes during your time apart and it will likely be up to YOU if you want to try and made it work.
Me- 30's H- 40's T-10 M-5 I moved out b/c he wanted space- June 15 D filed by H: September 16
Thanks feyth!! Such kind words, I am so appreciative! I am just going with the flow.
Ran a half marathon this weekend, what a disaster. I hurt my Achilles at mile 4 but of course kept going. I finished with my slowest time ever but could barely walk the next day. It is getting better now though. Too bad to because I crushed those first 4 miles and it was a beautiful course. My marathon training has been put on hold though 😒.
Going hiking this weekend. Not sure if I will see WW this weekend or not. I didn't contact her on Monday but she followed up with early morning txts Tuesday and Wednesday.... Steady as she goes
Oh No! I'm sorry to hear about your injury. Ugh. I've set myself back 5 weeks with my ankle, and trying to catch up is hard. Rest up. Lots of stretching!
Congrats on getting another half under your belt. Too funny- I will be hiking this weekend too! Watch for rocks and have fun!
Me- 30's H- 40's T-10 M-5 I moved out b/c he wanted space- June 15 D filed by H: September 16
Thanks Feyth! Yea the Achilles is being a biotch. Haven't been able to run for a week and a half. Hiking with my brother was awesome even on a partially bum ankle. I loved it! We are planning on doing Mt Washington in a few weeks. I hope your hike adventure was awesome!
I had a quick dinner with WW on sunday. It was OK. She wanted to sit on the same side of a booth which we actually never did before. I am having a bit of trouble with these couple like things. The last two dinners have been a bit uncomfortable. We are going to a baseball game next weekend so after that I think it will have to be time for a talk.
So last night I get a bunch of texts from WW. Normal stuff at first and then she gets in to how my sis, sister in law and basically a few female friends due to our marriage had unfriended her on facebook. Freaking facebook I'll tell ya. She was complaining about it and normally I would have been like... well... what do you expect? But I thought this was a great time for a 180. I listened and validated. I think that went well.
I don't know if I can do this again. It is de ja vu all over again. This would basically be the 4th time that we start again (only married once, the others were pre marriage). Every time it is the same thing... she ends it, does her thing for a while, comes back, is worried that everyone hates her, we are together for a while, she ends it... rinse and repeat. I am not sure how I can stop the cycle if we ended up back together. I have some ideas but I am not sure the risk would be worth it. I am getting old and want a family. hmph... I don't know.
pinn - thanks for pointing me to your thread. This has been quite the battle for you but I think you can be proud and hold your head high no matter the outcome.
One thing that came to mind while reading this was something that a friend told me about giving up that I thought you would appreciate. She said that when you are running a marathon you don't give up, you just have to do it one step at at time.
I'll certainly be looking forward to your updates.
On BD H52, W50 T27, M26 S21, D23 BD-9-Mar-16 D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18 I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good. But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
I don't know if I can do this again. It is de ja vu all over again. This would basically be the 4th time that we start again (only married once, the others were pre marriage). Every time it is the same thing... she ends it, does her thing for a while, comes back, is worried that everyone hates her, we are together for a while, she ends it... rinse and repeat. I am not sure how I can stop the cycle if we ended up back together. I have some ideas but I am not sure the risk would be worth it. I am getting old and want a family. hmph... I don't know.
First, I extend my encouragement and hopefully others are inspired...I want an arrow board pointing at the move out date and the fact that it took a year for stuff to start to swing in your direction.
Second, I quoted you to say I know the feeling. I think I'm on the 3rd time of this Break up, go away, come back thing w/ my WW - save the fact that she is not back this time and who knows if she will be back. Difference now is we are married and have a child. Maybe the cycle wont stop for us? I would hope age would make it stop, but there seem to be enough people here in their late 50"s/early 60's to shoot that idea in the face. So maybe it won't maybe it will. Congrats on feeling better though and on those marathons, hell of a GAL, I like it.
"There is no more important fight than the one for ourselves. Keep on winning." Ginger1, Read her newbies. BD: Feb '16 D: Mar '17 Piecing: Putting the self back together was my piecing. S6
Thanks Andrew and CT for stopping by. I appreciate the responses.
Yea my GAL has been pretty rewarding. It is the best thing that has happened during all of this. I really believe my social skills have improved along with my confidence which is great.
I haven't communicated with WW in a few days which is interesting. No plans to see her this weekend which would be the first weekend without seeing her in a month or so. That's OK though, I have some things planned. I think it is time for her to make her the effort and make it clear she wants to get together. If she asks about the lack of communication then it might be time for a bit of a truth dart stating that is on her to prove that this is what she wants... not sure about that one yet. We'll see how it goes.
Crazy how things flow... went from doing couply type things to now on the 5th day of NC. It is crazy. Not sure of the unfriending by the girls thing got to her or what but like Feyth said it really should be on her to push for things. She is the one who has something to prove not me so I'll just keep on keeping on. I am getting tired though and really starting to think about next steps. But for now, I do nothing...just sit back and watch :-). Hope everyone is having a great weekend!
And just like that I am back to wanting to throw in the towel. The ups and downs are insane. I do not understand the point of this state we are in. How can we be separated for over a year and never once discuss actual next steps. Does that make sense to anyone? I feel like I am going to have to be the one to bring this situation to a head.
72 hour rule in full effect right now, WW's previous texts deleted from phone to try and stop any urge I might have to contact (her contact info is not in my phone so it requires extra effort to contact her). I just get so frustrated sometimes! Just with the limbo land, not with wanting her back or anything. ugh!
And just like that I am back to wanting to throw in the towel. The ups and downs are insane. I do not understand the point of this state we are in. How can we be separated for over a year and never once discuss actual next steps. Does that make sense to anyone? I feel like I am going to have to be the one to bring this situation to a head.
pinn - I'm more than guilty of it than anyone but we both need to stop looking at the calendar and counting the days.
On BD H52, W50 T27, M26 S21, D23 BD-9-Mar-16 D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18 I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good. But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
