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She's knows that I want to start talking to her face-to-face against, but she's afraid of doing so (words of coaches) because she's so fearful of everything repeating itself. The opposite of what I'd do to get what "I" want, would be to not meet her tonight, and say if you want to talk, we should do it in counseling. If we meet and I don't push my wants on her, (in the past), its just ended in her spinning out of control and bringing up all the issues of the past. If I push my wants on her, she will see it as me trying to convince her of something...

I left a VM for the MC to call me back with first available scheduling, but with a long holiday weekend ahead, I don't expect a call back until Wed or Thur. I know, no rush, but my friend (her attorney) said they are filing formally on Tuesday, Wednesday morning at the latest. Not the end of the world, but it would be better if we could avoid the filing all together with intentions of going to MC a few times before it ever happens. It's all speculative... this way, that way, and all outcomes are probably the same in the end, I'm just thinking out loud at this point.


M34 W28, T7, M2
W filed D 6/7/16

...who doesn't love a lost cause?
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betterm,

I understand; it's the rock and hard place thingy. Thus, the name of my thread "conundrum." I wish I could offer up some good advice, but right now I'm caught up in boxes and mustaches (i.e. I'm useless).

I hope you can get some good help. I'm heading out to buy some plants. If I think of anything I'll let you know.

We clearly love these women, why else would we go through all of this stuff? Arrrrgghhhh...

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Originally Posted By: cbtdad

My situation is all about time
It's about showing real changes so I'm just being patient

I'm not sure my W is to the point of "looking for changes", she's still in the roller coaster realm and barely reaching the "trying to understand" phase...
My "changes" thus far have been viewed by her as selfish


M34 W28, T7, M2
W filed D 6/7/16

...who doesn't love a lost cause?
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job Offline
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Please start a new thread.


Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
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Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
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