Hi Sunny. I'm sorry that it's gone that way. Your posting about Mr Nica was always nice to read as he brought out positive feelings in you and that was great
Difficult to know what to post , obviously I'm sad for you and I wish I had something to say that would make this easier for you. It's too soon to be talking about another R but maybe Mr Nica has shown you that you deserve someone like him just without the issues in his life
You've come through the D , flourished , found a good man and that's not a bad list. Obviously I'm going to stick my pennies worth in here , could you slow down the R and see if time might change the sitch ? From your posts you seem very suited to each other and while I agree with the others that you will find another R when your ready , its tough for you to let this one go
Anyway , my full support is always here for you whatever happens and I'm sending a big hug across the pond.
I'm sorry Sunny. It's hard to make a decision to separate from a person we care for. Dating is so much simpler when we are in our early 20's. So many factors to consider as real adults with lives. It sounds like you both ending this with mutual admiration and respect, and sometimes the best we can hope for.
Thank you all, I appreciate your support. Ginger, yes, we will end this with mutual admiration and respect. We just haven't done it yet. LOL We are waiting until after his birthday, that was my request. The delay also gives us time to say things we want to say, gives me a little time to process. But the day I don't get that good morning text, the day I don't talk to him on his way to work.... that will be a tough one. Today is good, though.
RD, I appreciate your advice to slow down instead of end it. But I'm 100% convinced this is the way to go. A few weeks ago, I tried to slow down and enjoy the ride, but there's just a dealbreaker in here. I would not be opposed to trying again in a few months, if circumstances have changed. But I'm not holding my breath.
During the end of the time I was fighting for my M, I realized I had to let go of what I had to make room for something better. I thought My Nica was the better. But I again find myself letting go, and hoping for something better. Honestly, if it's better than him, I can't wait.
Hi Sunny. If your 100 % sure then that's good. I was worried there might be some doubt that could possibly nag at you.
I obviously couldn't miss the thinly veild reference to meeting me ( ' hoping for someone better ' ) but alas we are too far apart.
Take care. Rd xx
The doubt that will probably always nag at me is what if I'd met him at a different point in his life? The other day, My Nica asked why I hadn't met him when I was 22 instead of Mr. P. I had to point out to him that he was still a baby then and I wasn't looking at the high school boys. Still, a year from now would be a distinct possibility, and I will always wonder about that.
RD, you've turned me down so consistently I'm used to it by now.
Sunny, I just love reading your updates. You always sound so strong and unflappable.
Me, I am working towards being strong and perhaps eventually, towards being unflappable.
Grl, thank you. I hear the word "strong" used about me a lot, I'm not entirely sure that's true. I've always been an independent woman, although that got somewhat lost towards the end of my M. I think I'm much more myself now than I was 5 years ago. My Nica played a role in that, he allowed me to be myself and express myself and didn't criticize or belittle or attempt to change me. That was so eye opening, that a man would allow me just to be.
I think my unflappability comes largely from my belief that there's something good and right out there for me, if I just keep the faith, if I just act the way I should and keep a good attitude about it. That's partly a God thing, partly the way I choose to live my life. After all, what's the alternative?
Sunny, I love this. I am going to adopt this thinking too. There will always be something good and right out there for me. I just hope that this time round, I will be wise enough to recognise it.
You can call me Dory/ Grl.
As a wise fish once sang,"Just keep swimming!"
It's no use to go back to yesterday because I was a different person then.
Good and RIGHT. I Needed to hear that. Losing hope is the worst thing someone can do. I have been doing that lately which is why I have been on a downward spiral. Keeping the faith, what else can me do? The alternative stinks!
Still, a year from now would be a distinct possibility, and I will always wonder about that.