Waw, she is in love, need advice/support

[Bear007]

I am bit mad today, because... well, can I say I contributed to my marriage demise? Or it was lack of communication? or my wife's resentment torwards my action?

I am having this occasional thoughts, although I am aware that majoriti of this comes to my WW and her irrational future.

I am also mad that she showed me she is willing to change (I have been pushing her for years), but not for me or because of me, and I am mad because it hurts.

[Bear007]

Book arrived today, finally.

Will take a look later, I must find time when there is no distraction around me (wife especially)

[Bear007]

Wife decided to look at jobs beyond her comfort zone, so this weekend she sent more than her usual amount of CV's. This is good and bad, since it only shows her determination to get away from me, and on the other side I always pushed her to look for job that would expand her limits.

she wanted to have sex few times, but I declined her, more words. She was angry Monday morning, probably expected to get her urge to end.

[Bear007]

Still in status quo, she is living on a couch, determined to get away, looking for a job, doing housework, going to gym.

She looks better than ever, and more confidence (and being in love) shows, other males are approaching to her. She used to be annoyed by that, now it flatters her. Strange.

[Bear007]

Still don't know if this what my wife is going through is MLC or WW, because symptoms are shared.

She said (repeatedly) to me that she is leaving because she cannot stand living with me for the rest of her life, that she is suicidal with me, that we will both be better off separated.

The fact is I am confused now more than ever and with her still sleeping on the couch and not finding a job, occasionally wanting to hug and cuddle, wanting sex, but not wanting relationship with me.

[Bear007]

Weekend is coming, another 2 days of her being happy when on Facebook or thinking about OM. And of course, resignation and defeatism when thinking about marriage.

[Bear007]

And weekend is over. Lost of activities, she has even shared some activities with me, we tried inline skating - we are both beginners. I managed to roll 2 miles in 40 minutes, she decided to quit since she was insecure when she put them on, and bike instead.
also managed to spend some family time together.

She still said that she is leaving as soon as he finds a job.
She also wanted sex, hugged me and kissed me, but I again rejected her.

[Bear007]

Yesterday she came home depressed with suicidal thoughts.

She has this suicidal thoughts from time to time, and this time probably her inability to move away from me is what has triggered it (with PMS as usual culprit).

She still has not found job, in last 2 months she has sent 12 applications. I was amazed. How someone who is adult and wants to live on her own can be so delusional, that with only 12 applications in 2 months she can even think of getting more than 2 interviews (which she had...)

[Bear007]

Since status quo has been going on for long time I have definitely lost some of the energy that I had at first for GAL and keeping 360 advice.

this new state where she is sleeping on couch indefinitely is now becoming new normal, and this is not ok with me, I can't live my life expecting her to find a job and move out (or get on with her life, or for her to decide to try something to save marriage)

[Bear007]

Today again, she wanted sex, and she came on to me with: don't you want it, don't you want this body (pointing to herself, she obviously thinks very high of her new body after losing weight).

Not only that I was not in any mood for this I also don't find this kind of approach very appealing - I like it when there is seduction or some bonding before.

Lately she is spending lot of time in fronnt of the mirror and then she asks:
-do you like my bum, do you like my abs, can you see this triceps etc.

So far my reaction has been not so enthusiastic, more like someone who does not care.
Truth is (and of course she will not get this from me) is that her skin is still full of cellulite and that I am very satisfied with her getting in shape.

Should I react with more enthusiasm or should I try to ignore it like I have been so far?