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Rain75 Offline OP
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He just alluded to having met someone. Not cam girls...not xow...someone new. I thought I was ready to hear that. I'm wasn't. I'm not ready but it's out there.


Rain (moi): 40
Ex Fiance: 39
3 kids
On/off again EA & PA
Last BD by ow 12/15
Moved kids and myself back into our own place: 12/15
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Originally Posted By: Rain75
And can I just say LOL. " I blocked her for a while taking a page out of your playbook". But NYG don't EVER take a page out of my playbook. I am a hot mess that takes 1 step forward and 5 back.

....I have been a very slow student. But I am still plugging along.


You are NOT a slow student, just a stubborn one. wink. I think you're miscounted get your steps. I think it's more like 5 forward and 3 back. You make great strides, then get nervous and step back a bit. But, all in all you're still moving forward not backward. Lighten up on yourself, you're going through an emotionally devastating time right now. No one can be expected to be there very best during this time. You're doing what you need to though and will eventually be happy one way or another. Patience my dear Rain. And, before you say it, I KNOW that you're struggling almost as much with patience as I am. LOL


M:45 H:48
M:11
No kids
BD:Sept'15
EA:Confirmed 1wk later
PA: Oct'15
12 '15 2 wk R
Just kidding, H wants NC
12 '15 H back w/OW
4 '15 R &still working on it
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NYGal, I am so sorry that you seem to have hit a rough patch here lately. I know you will get through it soon though. I tend to agree with Rain on this one...they ALL lie about their spouses. ALL of them do. It would be crazy if your W didn't do this. They have to because it makes it look like they had a reason for leaving you. And, they have to have a reason or they would look like the bad guy. It's just about appearances in everyone else's eyes and your Ws desire not to look like the bad guy to them. I'm sure my H did the same thing. I have NO IDEA what he told ow, but I'm sure it was some lie to make himself look better. After H pulled the rug out from me the second time I asked him what he had just old her. He wouldn't tell me, he just said "Just what she needed to know." Well, you know what? She didn't need to know ANYTHING!!!!!

Anyway, just remember that this has nothing to do with YOU. It's just about her trying not to look like a complete idiot for leaving you. Keep your head up, this will all eventually pass.


M:45 H:48
M:11
No kids
BD:Sept'15
EA:Confirmed 1wk later
PA: Oct'15
12 '15 2 wk R
Just kidding, H wants NC
12 '15 H back w/OW
4 '15 R &still working on it
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Rain75 Offline OP
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Quote:

You are NOT a slow student, just a stubborn one. wink. I think you're miscounted get your steps. I think it's more like 5 forward and 3 back. You make great strides, then get nervous and step back a bit. But, all in all you're still moving forward not backward. Lighten up on yourself, you're going through an emotionally devastating time right now. No one can be expected to be there very best during this time. You're doing what you need to though and will eventually be happy one way or another. Patience my dear Rain. And, before you say it, I KNOW that you're struggling almost as much with patience as I am. LOL


Very stubborn. Yes sir. That's me. smile I did not cry even though it temporarily felt like a knife in my heart when he did the alluding. That's huge. And I also didn't say anything. Ive been here before. Nothing I say or do will stop the train wreck if it's true.

So bam...two 180s!

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Originally Posted By: Rain75
He just alluded to having met someone. Not cam girls...not xow...someone new. I thought I was ready to hear that. I'm wasn't. I'm not ready but it's out there.


I call b.s. He's just trying to get at you. If he really met someone else that he was involved with, why was he sending texts yesterday asking for prices?

Be strong, Rain. He's fishing for a reaction.


Me: 43, Him: 40
Married: 21 years

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Rain75 Offline OP
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Worst fishing expedition EVER!!

Cause he got nothing from me. I pretended that I didn't even hear him. I did some small talk for another minute and told him to enjoy his night.

Then I of course ran on here to post. But hey, he doesn't know that.

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Originally Posted By: Rain75
He just alluded to having met someone. Not cam girls...not xow...someone new. I thought I was ready to hear that. I'm wasn't. I'm not ready but it's out there.


I guess we were posting at the same time and I somehow missed seeing this post.

What an A$$hole! I'm ready to come to wherever in the world you live and tell you XF exactly what I think of him! I know you love him and all that, but he's really about to grate on my very last nerve!

Glad I got that out....

So,, what exactly did he say? Do you think he's just trying to make you jealous? Perhaps getting back at you for making him think you're talking to other "friends" on your video chatting app? Remember one of the main DB rules......BELIEVE NOTHING THEY SAY!

(((((Rain))))). I'm sorry that he just keeps throwing things at you every stinking day. Eventually he will push you too far and he won't be able to reach you when he decides to come back. He's an idiot and you deserve SOOOOOOOOOO much better than anything he seems to have to offer you at the moment.


M:45 H:48
M:11
No kids
BD:Sept'15
EA:Confirmed 1wk later
PA: Oct'15
12 '15 2 wk R
Just kidding, H wants NC
12 '15 H back w/OW
4 '15 R &still working on it
Joined: Nov 2015
Posts: 603
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Originally Posted By: annab74
I call b.s. He's just trying to get at you. If he really met someone else that he was involved with, why was he sending texts yesterday asking for prices?

Be strong, Rain. He's fishing for a reaction.


I agree with Anna. And, even more than the "prices," what happens when our idiots find a new ow? Yep, they drop us like a hot potato because at that moment, they need nothing from us. He has done the OPPOSITE of drop you like a hot potato! If he had a new interest, you wouldn't hear a word from him because he would be completely gone to you. Completely dark. Kind of like my H! He is actively involved with ow, and in return, wants NOTHING to do with me. Would rather do anything other than have to talk to me or look at my face. frown I'm sad just writing that because I know how true it is.


M:45 H:48
M:11
No kids
BD:Sept'15
EA:Confirmed 1wk later
PA: Oct'15
12 '15 2 wk R
Just kidding, H wants NC
12 '15 H back w/OW
4 '15 R &still working on it
Joined: Nov 2015
Posts: 603
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Originally Posted By: Rain75
Then I of course ran on here to post. But hey, he doesn't know that.


See, I told you that you're not a slow learner! That was perfect! He does NOT need to know that he's getting to you. That's what WE are here for! You be strong when dealing with XF, then come here and let your true feelings out. We will always be here to cheer you on, be your backbone when you need one, hand you a box of tissues, cry with you, share your joys, encourage you.....or whatever you need! You did an awesome job!


M:45 H:48
M:11
No kids
BD:Sept'15
EA:Confirmed 1wk later
PA: Oct'15
12 '15 2 wk R
Just kidding, H wants NC
12 '15 H back w/OW
4 '15 R &still working on it
Joined: Dec 2015
Posts: 1,415
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He definitely hasn't met anyone. He's trying to make you jealous, that's all. Don't give it a second thought. He needs some serious counseling to get off this train wreck.


11/4/15 W revealed EA/2 months later became PA with co-worker
Reconciling since late April 2016
Don't give up until it's time, then move on
Be patient, strong and kind but never a doormat
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