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Uphill Offline OP
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Ok, it's cool haha. I do the same thing through the day at work smile . Yeah, lots of buildup and letdown. But now I do feel like I have a sense of direction. I do still think of different things from time to time, it feels different though. More like its my brains way of comprehending everything? Not so much obsession. I don't know if that is the right word for it but I think you'll understand?


Me 34, XF 27
Many years together
Son 4
Engaged
Not engaged
Many false starts by XF
7/16 new girlfriend comes into my life
2/17 girlfriend moves in my home


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Yes, I think the build ups and let downs are the things to watch out for. That's when you are being pulled back onto the rollercoaster. It is possible things may be shifting - or they may not - and it's important not to be too invested in what she is saying or doing.

For now, I would keep working on your own stuff and things will unfold in time...


T 13 M 7
Me 48 H 46
SS 15
BD 7.14 PA
D final 5.16 (H filed)

We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
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Uphill Offline OP
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My plan is me and S4 living it up. He is part of me, and he deserves to be nothing but happy. If XF were to come around and start really trying to be involved with us, maybe. If she doesn't, her loss at this point. I put all the effort I could into keeping myself from getting to this point, now it is on her to show a little "want" if it is ever to turn around.


Me 34, XF 27
Many years together
Son 4
Engaged
Not engaged
Many false starts by XF
7/16 new girlfriend comes into my life
2/17 girlfriend moves in my home


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Posts: 1,016
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Uphill Offline OP
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Had an uneventful S4 swap last night. Afterwards stopped for a few beers on my way home. Ran into a few people I have seen in ages. Got home a little later than expected so I put the laundry duties off for the night haha. Work was kinda slow today so I bailed out early and got everything that was left outside put away in the garage for winter.

Now, what to do tonight?????


Me 34, XF 27
Many years together
Son 4
Engaged
Not engaged
Many false starts by XF
7/16 new girlfriend comes into my life
2/17 girlfriend moves in my home


Joined: Jun 2015
Posts: 1,016
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Uphill Offline OP
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Hello friends! Busy weekend, I didn't have time to post or keep up on much going on here... Hope all is well with everybody!

Friday evening was pretty uneventful. Had dinner and a few drinks with a few friends. Saturday it got overly busy. First thing was to split up the cell phone bill at the store. Ran into a few things there and it took longer than I allowed for my schedule. Stupid update clauses and contracts haha. Got that all figured out, but not before S4 ended up with an iPad because it was the only way I could upgrade my smashed phone.

After that me and my little buddy rushed to get to his hayride. The Sunday school he goes to had their fall festival, all the kids there had a blast!

From there we had to rush home to the circus at my house. It got thrown on my lap, Friday night, by family who were in town for the weekend. They planned to have a thanksgiving dinner at my place and forgot to let me know?!?! So we had an impromptu dinner at my house for about 20 people. Due to limited time to plan, it was pizza and Stromboli!!! Haha it's all I could pull off with my busy day which was already planned.

Spent most of the day yesterday cleaning up from that and helping S4 make his Christmas list for Santa.

Didn't really spend much time thinking about XF. Didn't have the time to do that smile . The few times I did it was short lived and not very painful...


Me 34, XF 27
Many years together
Son 4
Engaged
Not engaged
Many false starts by XF
7/16 new girlfriend comes into my life
2/17 girlfriend moves in my home


Joined: Jun 2015
Posts: 1,016
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Uphill Offline OP
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Side note, this coming weekend is booked solid also. Obviously thanksgiving Thursday with family. Friday, S4 and me are gonna go pick out and cut down a Christmas tree. (That may get to me a bit, kinda a tradition of "ours" for many years. Saturday, I am going to go meet up with my sister and her friend from work. Lunch and some running around. This is the friend that my sister has been pretty admate about me meeting. So I figure with my sister there and "plans" it won't put much pressure on anything. Gives me a kinda easy out if it doesn't feel right. That way I can test the waters and not have to offend anybody if I have to go. They can just continue with their own thing...


Me 34, XF 27
Many years together
Son 4
Engaged
Not engaged
Many false starts by XF
7/16 new girlfriend comes into my life
2/17 girlfriend moves in my home


Joined: Jun 2015
Posts: 1,435
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Uphill, I am glad you are doing well. Keeping busy is definitely a huge help.

Do you think you are ready to meet someone new? Take it slow Uphill!



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Uphill Offline OP
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Honestly pho, I have no idea? I miss the friendship and companionship of having somebody. BUT I'm not sure if I am ready or not? Maybe I feel a little more comfortable with it because of how it is happening? My sister, friend and me. Not a "date" or an awkward dinner that I have to try to force a conversation. Just meeting them to get some things done and see how it feels... Dip my toe in the water and see how it is.

I'm torn on the whole thing so I'm just gonna go with the flow. If it feels wrong, I can just "have to leave"...

Last edited by Uphill; 11/23/15 06:16 PM.

Me 34, XF 27
Many years together
Son 4
Engaged
Not engaged
Many false starts by XF
7/16 new girlfriend comes into my life
2/17 girlfriend moves in my home


Joined: Jul 2015
Posts: 986
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otw Offline
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I dont have anything to add here, but if i know anything that i have read about experiences then saw them happening in my life a little down the road.

i am paying close attention here since I couldnt imagine trying to relate to another person on an emotional level right now let alone physical. Actually i think the emotional level is more. Having someone else know all of the things W is supposed to be the person knowing is tough to imagine.

Best of luck and looking forward to hearing about everything.


M 37
W 34

T 12
M 8
D 7
S 4

Need break 4/12/15
W no ring 7/7/15

Separate room 4/12/15
Separate living suggested 8/15
W moved out 11/1/15
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Uphill Offline OP
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It could blow up in my face like other things I have done otw... I'm a risk taker by nature (for crying out loud, we race $100,000 cars for fun haha), sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't! The more I think about it, it may just be a test I'm giving myself?

Last edited by Uphill; 11/23/15 09:26 PM.

Me 34, XF 27
Many years together
Son 4
Engaged
Not engaged
Many false starts by XF
7/16 new girlfriend comes into my life
2/17 girlfriend moves in my home


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