Yeah. I try to remember she has a lot of issues that are long before I was ever around. Unfortunately I missed my opportunity to get her help early in our M. I didn't realize the huge mistake I was making. And then instead of dealing directly with the issues I held them in and then would get drunk and act out.
Live and learn. Honestly. I am still not giving up. I spent a lot of time praying today and I felt God telling me "Just wait on me, this is what I've been telling you along. I've got this"
Not sure exactly what it means. I guess either He is going to work a miracle in our M or He is going to save me from an abusive R and has something so much better planned
Me 40 WW 41 D 4 S 12 S 14 BD 6.16.2015 W stopped wearing ring 9.4.15 W Filed Divorce 9.14.15 My ring off 11.15.15 D finalized 12.18.15 WXW (wayward X wife) moved out 1.28.16 got her own place
G, I too mishandled things and would drink and get angry. That is the whole reason I am here. She won't forgive me for what I said years ago while drinking. (I don't even know what it is)
Keep praying, and hold on to hope. Just don't hinge your life on it. Talking to myself here too. Let go and let God, right?
Good luck!
35 3 boys Not my circus, not my monkeys anymore....
When we are at our weakest He is at His strongest. Got to lean into Him
Me 40 WW 41 D 4 S 12 S 14 BD 6.16.2015 W stopped wearing ring 9.4.15 W Filed Divorce 9.14.15 My ring off 11.15.15 D finalized 12.18.15 WXW (wayward X wife) moved out 1.28.16 got her own place
crazy the thoughts going through my head. WW and D4 are gone for a couple days. I actually thought "I should change the sheets bc then she'll think I had someone stay at the house while she was gone. That would drive her crazy"
Not going to do it. Just sharing thoughts so I can get them out of my head
Me 40 WW 41 D 4 S 12 S 14 BD 6.16.2015 W stopped wearing ring 9.4.15 W Filed Divorce 9.14.15 My ring off 11.15.15 D finalized 12.18.15 WXW (wayward X wife) moved out 1.28.16 got her own place
well WW just sent a text. It's 10:42 pm here. She is at her families about 6 hours away. She said "I miss you not being here"
Last time she was away she sent a text just like this. I didn't respond and she said she thought we missed an opportunity. She reached out and I blew her off. I'm going to respond but very carefully
Me 40 WW 41 D 4 S 12 S 14 BD 6.16.2015 W stopped wearing ring 9.4.15 W Filed Divorce 9.14.15 My ring off 11.15.15 D finalized 12.18.15 WXW (wayward X wife) moved out 1.28.16 got her own place
Well. after about 5 min I responded "Do you? She responded " I wouldn't have said if I didn't think it" a couple min later I said " What are you going to do about it?"
It's been 20 minutes and no response. Probably expecting me to say " I miss you too" and feeling lonely.
We'll see if she reaches out anymore over the next couple days.
Me 40 WW 41 D 4 S 12 S 14 BD 6.16.2015 W stopped wearing ring 9.4.15 W Filed Divorce 9.14.15 My ring off 11.15.15 D finalized 12.18.15 WXW (wayward X wife) moved out 1.28.16 got her own place
I'm not vet but maybe validate and a nice open reply?
' that's nice , I miss you too''
Me49 W45 T15 M13 S11 S8 BD 11/15/11 & 3/27/12 Moved out 4/9/12 Moved back 4/23/12 W working on US 5/20/12 Now Piecing! May-Oct14 drifting Dec 14 W agrees to more QT BD Oct15 ILYBINILWY W filed 1/25/16
Yes, I agree with Isit. Your responses applied immediate pressure and she backed away. Best to just receive the message and respond as Isit suggested....or just with
Thanks W - and leave things at that.
If you always try to push things along 'what are you going to do about it' - she will likely keep withdrawing...
Don't worry and just let this one pass.....there will be a next time..
T 13 M 7 Me 48 H 46 SS 15 BD 7.14 PA D final 5.16 (H filed)
We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
What are you going to do about it .... Gives me an image of you standing there with your hands on your hips , stern look on face.
That's nice, missing you too. Hope you sleep well. Zzzzzz
Me49 W45 T15 M13 S11 S8 BD 11/15/11 & 3/27/12 Moved out 4/9/12 Moved back 4/23/12 W working on US 5/20/12 Now Piecing! May-Oct14 drifting Dec 14 W agrees to more QT BD Oct15 ILYBINILWY W filed 1/25/16
As with the rest I agree questons should be avoided, especially if they may be taken as pressure.
An alternative reply could have been ...
Thanks sleep tight and kiss kids goodnight for me.
IMHO You would have acknowledged her feelings, replied warmly but not given them more importance than they deserve at this stage, shifted focus on children and in an indirect way tell her your children are more on your mind than her.
A bit like when you tell someone you love them and they say thanks. Hurts doesnt it?.
