Hope everything is solid on your end Rd. Still sounds like you're navigating difficult times with grace and strength. Your words and wisdom are always such a huge help in my situation, I hope I can lend you a hand in the same way.
Truthfully, every time Pink posts on your thread I'm inclined to check it too, since it brings a smile to my face.
Had no idea you were a kidney recipient, I hope to read the novel about your life at some point.
Stay strong my friend, your still in the weeds a bit, but are handling them beautifully.
PP
M 39 W 36 T5 M3 BD - 1/15 Separated - Same Day Served 9/15 D finalized 6/17
Vanillia. D tales 5 years here so I don't think that's it. I don't feel married anymore and do think I've accepted that. Maybe dating is not for me and I m happier alone. There was no guilt or worry about EXW while I was on the date
Mahanny. Thanks for the support. It hard to now how we will feel in a few months so I never say never but. ............
PP. Kidney transplant is a new world and I'm so grateful. Your strength in your sitch is great to read and even today you seem to have processed your Ws change in a healthy way and not reacted to it like you would have before. Re her pinching herself !!!!! I would take that with a pinch of salt. Picture of Wolfie far more positive and welcome
Pink. What a lovely opening to your last post. I googled translated it and Google said. ". You are hot stud muffin and I want you now ". !!!!!!!! Really lovely. !!!
I'm kidding of course I did really translate it and it brought a huge smile to my heart and face. Thank you. The next date I go on will be with you and I'm happy to wait until we can sort it out
I'm ok. EXW ran over a dog last week and has been distraught. I have helped by chatting over the phone and she has been very grateful , telling me I'm the only person she has to confide in. Their was lots of chat but basically I just helped her deal with it
She called yesterday and asked if my mother would come for. Xmas to the family home and spend Xmas with the family like before BD. EXW and my Mum have not spoken for over a year so request was a bit weird
Please post lovely Pink , I would love to get a full update. Xx
Glad your kidneys are OK. Cruel world eh? The good guys always get the worst illnesses.
So, you enjoyed your date, but you don't feel ready yet? Hey, seems reasonable to me. That doesn't mean you can't see her again. Why don't you explain and have a little 'non sexual' fun with her? Dates, meals, company? Why not?
Your XW seems in a bad place. I do hope she can find some peace.
M 45 W 52 SD22 S9 D8 BD 6 April 2015 Not living together 4 Dec 2015
RD!! Funny, that wasn't what came up in Google for me!
So, no second date with lady doctor then? You'll know when the time is right I think. There's no rush...
You're sounding upbeat anyway my friend. I'm sorry about your EXW and the dog; that must have been upsetting for her, and it was good that you could help.
As you say - funny request about your Mum coming over - maybe a little wistfulness there - or wanting things to be the same for the kids in so far as possible?
I don't know - but sounds like a lovely plan to have your Mum over anyways...
Hope you have a good weekend my friend xx
T 13 M 7 Me 48 H 46 SS 15 BD 7.14 PA D final 5.16 (H filed)
We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
Thanks for updating. I always heard that Portuguese language have a lot of words, but never heard a few will translate into so many in English.
By the way, I guess I could say all that translation too. Just need to be careful as V said. She is a wise woman and said I am having an EA with you, and you are married!!!
Maybe it is not the nicest or wisest thing to do right now. Life is crazy and our hearts goes in too many directions, but I like to think that you are there, somewhere, but there.
Somehow it is probably very comfortable because we are not really an immediate danger to each other. And I sometimes guess you have a little romantic dreamer inside of you just like I have.
The truth is that maybe this, maybe something else, but I enjoy thinking about you. When I wash clothes, I think about what you said of having the neighbors laundry at your house, it makes me smile.
When I cook, I just think it would be a torture to me if I need to cook for all our kids, and it is a lot of big boys, and it makes me smile.
My kids also mention that Irish man normally spank their wives and we laugh about it too.
So, you are the good that came into my life when I need to just be strong and keep going the way I could. And for that alone I am very grateful to you.
RD, I am less brave then you, I do not want to date anyone. I just want to have some fun but without any dates. I have been going out sometimes, but just with my girlfriends. Today I am going for a dinner and right after a comedy concert with my oldest boy, we will see Sam Adams and he is very good.
Why I don't want to date? Because I know I am not ready. And I have no idea of when I will be ready if ever. I do not have much time to dedicate to a new person and wouldn't be fair to play with other people's feelings.
Your W or XW as you say, I feel really sorry that she needs to endure all the pain she has. I can't help but think like a woman and I just wonder why did she put herself into this big hole.
By what you say, I can think that with your kidney transplant, hospital stay, four kids, all the chores, you running your own business... maybe her wires got all burned.
Yes, many women can endure it all and never go crazy or depressed, but some will do. I don't really have much to say about your dates, but from the bottom of my heart I wish and pray that your W gets to her senses and decide to work in your R and try to get the family back together.
I value family more then anything in this world, and I think you two would be happier together with your children then not.
In the meantime, happy you did not betray our EA.
RD, I am at work and need to do some more stuff around here. No patients today, but lots of paperwork. I would love to write forever but can't right now.
It's very cold here. Some snow on the ground already. Will keep you warm in my heart while thinking about you.
And sorry V, but I rather risk the EA then live empty.
Hi Pink. It's a bit late to worry about an EA. I've been in love for months !!!!!
On the dating front , I think you don't really know if your ready unless you try. I wanted to try because I do get lonely and wondered if it was just a desire more than a need I do get to meet a lot of people and because of my charming nature ( ! ) I seem to chat to a lot of ladies.
For me it wasn't exciting or that enjoyable other than an ego boost that a intelligent , pretty lady would like to spend time with me and that's no recipe for a friendship
Funny thing was during the meal Dr asked about my youth and we spoke about cars and motorbikes and I pictured talking to you and the tales that we would tell. It didn't seem appropriate to tell Dr about some of the less safe adventures that happened
Re EXW , I was with LC recently and she wants me to wait for EXW to come to her senses LC was really pleased with my progress and told me to come back once a month instead of every two weeks
EXW lives I a one bedroom apartment and told me today that every time it rains her kitchen floods. She has opened up recently and it's hard to see someone' you built a life with so sad
Thanks for the lovely post and I love seeing when you post and reading you lovely words
Oh dear, angel? You are the first person in my life that calls me "Anjo". I guess no tried because they could see the little devil inside.
RD, we are stock on moving forward, moving on and yet waiting with all relate to our Xs. Aren't you afraid to get stock on some weird internet love?
I get the whole lonely feeling. I do get lonely, not physically because there is always kids, friends, family, phone, facebook, Whatsapp, messages, email, you name it.
But that special person to share a beer... no, no. By my side it's all good, I actually feel good by myself now. And maybe I need to be careful, because I start enjoying my freedom again.
I think it is now against the rules to ask questions of likes and dislikes no?
So, here we go: My favorite colors? Black, white, blue, pink, red and sand.
favorite movie? I love many, but the one I love forever is "Gone with the Wind", for some reason I always felt a little like Scarlett O'Hara.
Movie themes I like: Horror (I love the vampires), then drama, suspense. For comedy, I like the sarcastic ones.
Sports I like: Soccer of course, hockey, I also like rugby and football, volleyball. Can't have much patience for golf and tennis.
My best vacation: at the beach. Love it with all my heart. It's the best place on earth.
I do like summer better then winter - but enjoy some cold some time.
Oi -de-rosa . minhas cores favorige são vermelho e amarelo. eu amo ações filmes e realmente comédias estúpidas eu gosto de comer fora e cuddlng -se no sofá motos são a minha paixão e eu também adoro carros. sou muito romântico e gosta de fazer as coisas pequenas, mas especiais para aqueles que eu amo . fins de semana fora com lotes de rir e compartilhar histórias seria fantástico e espero ter isso na minha vida novamente um dia. Seus posts encantadores aquecer meu coração e sua proberbly melhor que nós não podemos atender porque desta forma estamos a salvo de se machucar. i considerá-lo um amigo de verdade e quer apenas o melhor
RD, honey, I'm going to call you out on something. You've said more than once, most recently to our dear friend Cira, that you can't enter a relationship again for fear of getting hurt. RD, you can't live life that way, all closed off. Yes, you are going to get hurt again, I guarantee it. It will be a friend, a relative, someone. There will be someone you open up to that doesn't return your love, who betrays you, who breaks your heart. That doesn't mean you should live in a box, RD. I know, I lived in a box, a teeny tiny little box for a lot of years, and believe me, it's no way to live. You miss out on so much, and it doesn't keep you from getting hurt, anyway. Open up, RD, don't be afraid to live. You are attracted to Cira because she lives large, lives with passion, and you know that's deep inside you, too, it's clear in your stories. Don't deny that for fear of getting hurt again, RD. Live large. Be bold, be out there, open up. Life is waiting.
Hi Sunny. I get where your coming from and I haven't closed off forever just for now. I have never handled rejection well and like most on here I really believed EXW and I would be together for ever.
I don't think I could handle rejection on that level again I have the business and my kids to keep me very busy I do meet ladies and you never know what's around the corner.
I e always been drawn to Pink because I see the rebel but also the caring. All the ladies who have taken an interest in me seem unbelievably kind and caring and it staggers me that your Hs are so stupid.
Pink also reminds me of a girl I was very close with right before I met EXW. She was a biker , really cool and beautiful. My group of friends all went to Soul and Northern Soul clubs and this girl danced like an angel. She went out with one of my best friends and when they split we became fantastic friends We did date for a while but she wasn't over my friend. (. Brad Pitts double before Brad was famous ). He was killed in a bike crash a few months later and she was devastated.
Before I left UK for Ireland I went see this girl. , I was living with EXW at this stage and deeply in love. Myself and the girl went to a park and chatted about our deceased friend While sitting on a bench an elderly couple walked past and the lady told us that she was a psychic and could see our souls were meant to be together. The girl was very emotional anyway but this pushed her over the edge and she begged me to stay with her. It was one of the hardest days of my life and I did love this girl on some level She's happily married now with 2 kids !!
Pink has always reminded my of this girl in lots of ways and I so wish I could have met her back In the day because I'm sure we would have been great friends
I don't think you and I would have that deep connection Sunny , it would be much more of a animalistic Phyiscal thing !!!!!!!!! You know , never getting dressed or talking , just physical , over over again Just satisfying our most basic needs Again and again. Would that be enough ? Maybe for a few years but eventually after trying everything and more , again and again !!! We would need to take a break and start over for another few years and an endless cycle would repeat itself and that's no good. , IS IT ??????
