Hi Sotto. It was a good evening. Lady is an ER doctor from Greece. We seemed to get on well and she's asked to se me again. We had a nice steak dinner over looking Dublin bay and the food was great
Not sure how I feel , lady was very attractive ( if you like that blond haired , blue eyed , pretty , fit type ) funny and good conversationalist She laughed at my jokes ( always a bonus ) and she was a really positive , can do type of person
Maybe I'm just not ready or maybe I'm more attached than i realise. im certainly not as keen as the Dr is
Other news EXW called on Friday and she had run over a dog at the animal shelter where she works. She was very upset and I did go over the friend limit a wee bit. I offered to meet her but she said it was ok.
She called later that evening to thank me for talking to her and caring. I validated
Nothing much else to report. Feeling like I'm on an even keel most of the time and that's welcome. Kids all doing well D116s birthday at the end of the month and he's already looking at cars ! !!!
Small bit of bad news , I didn't win the euro millions , so that's not good. !!
Hi Mr Bond. Indeed she does. Dr has been separated for 10'years and I'm just over the year mark now. I'm an honest person by nature and don't think I would be very good at the deceiving stuff.
I have thanked you on previous posts as you were the first to offer excellent advice at a time when I was deeply hurt and felt like life was not worth living
No problem. And so why had Dr. not gotten a D herself? I can sense a strong EA starting because of your shared marital situations. Two hurting people coming together is never a good thing for a healthy relationship.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
I didn't really ask those questions because I was just out for a meal and some company Dr has lived away from her homeland for 8 of those years in Canada
Re an EA , I don't think I would see it that way. EXW has made her choices , she removed her ring and while there is a legal bond , the M is over.
Should EXW announce a new R then that's her choice and likewise for myself
I wanted EXW to have her space and decide what she wanted. She has had her space , she has been suicidail , she has told me she does not regret our M , is sorry for her actions last year and sorry for saying things that hurt me and does not feel she rejected me but her life. She still says she does not know what she's wants and is often in tears re her life At the end of the day she left her children, myself and our family life Actions speak louder than words and her actions are what they are
Also reconciliation would seem to be impossible due to the hurt and lies. I do appreciate that people do overcome this , I'm not sure I could
You are a very brave and decided man indeed. I am happy for you that you are trying to move forward if not move on with your life.
It make it easier once a person reach that stage, even that level of confidence after such a trauma as we all went through.
The lady was everything good and you enjoyed your time with her, but you may be right saying you may be much less detached then you think. By what you told us, it did not shake the ground for you.
I think it is a long process to let go. Mainly to let go on the idea of a family we built up long ago and tough it would just hold strong as a family forever.
The deep wounds we now carry with us are there to stay. If we move on, it will be with all the hurt inside. It does not mean we will carry pain forever, that we won't learn from all of this, but the wound will be there and will remind us of the good and bad consequences it had.
I need to apologize for not updating my situation. My boys are OK, HS football season is over, my 2nd kid is applying for college and we have a lot of paperwork to do, and on and on we go. I am just very, very busy.
Yet, I sometimes need to help my X idiot H, he still cries a lot, goes to my house, says that he loves me and lately is recognizing he was a complete Jerk to me during our M.
I want to detail all this, I certainly need some wise advice that I many times got here. I just feel things are changing inside of me, slowly, but they are changing.
I really wish I had the meanings to meet you and chat for a long time about all this, kids, work, life in general. But, life is the way it is right now and I need to be the responsible adult right now. So, I let it in God's hands.
It might simply be until you are D, you aren't free n your mind.
This is true of me until my D is done, I still feel tied, it still seems to me to even date another an one on one is an A or EA, even though BD1 was over a year ago and WH and I have had no connection or sex since Feb 2014. I would that I feel otherwise, but it is my sense of me. It occurs to me too that anyone willing to date an S is slightly yuk, although this makes little sense in logic. I do not want to consider myself that yuk.
It is not my nature to give of myself until I a free of WH. It will not take long. My choice is unlikely to be someone S no matter how long, I sense religious issues or attachment, it inhibits.
I wish you joy and hope.
I sense though like V you stand for you M and family, even if WW is not your chosen version of a W at this stage.
V
Last edited by Vanilla; 11/12/1501:48 PM.
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
RD - I have to say. I've always checked in on you, but rarely posted. Your calm within the storm has been admirable an it has helped me through my dark days.
Originally Posted By: rd500
Also reconciliation would seem to be impossible due to the hurt and lies. I do appreciate that people do overcome this , I'm not sure I could
I can relate. You know the answers to your problems. Let it go, b/c it's out of your control.
Good luck Buddy.
Me: 32 W: 29 T:8 M: 6 D4 S2 M - 8/2008 W is not happy - 1/2014 W wants D - 9/2014 W moved out - 11/2014 D filed - 1/23/2015 D'ed - 2/25/2015 Gave X the Letter - 11/10/2015
