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tl2 #2614605 10/12/15 07:18 AM
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Hi day I'm happy you had a good day! !! We got this!!! Show her that only a fool would leave you. .. I'm working on that. I'm working on my confidence and my self esteem. I'm also working on being independent. Like I don't need him. . I'm pretending lol. Good night and you've got God on your side. Believe me when I say that. Read my post.lol


Me 34 H 33
Married 2006
S5 D2
BD Jan 2015 EA/PA
He moved out 2/2/2015
Came back 5/2015
Filed divorce papers 8/21/2015
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I am grateful today:

Had a great time last night, with a lot of good people.

Taking the boys to the BBQ place tonight, MNF specials are helpful.

Ghost stories last night made the boys extra cuddly!


35
3 boys
Not my circus, not my monkeys anymore....
dday #2614723 10/12/15 03:07 PM
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Here is a brief recap of my sitch:

I want nothing more than returning to my family, and to a much better M.

W filed 9/1, and since then has been nicer and afraid to start a confrontation over anything. We have had 2 L meetings, over the seperation agreements.

I get the boys 3x weekly. And I have rented a house. Kids constantly ask when I am coming home, and have ben asking W also. W wants to sit together when in public. She has asked for favors, and offered to do things for me. Has given me food at kid swaps.

3 weeks ago, W said:
I know we aren't broken beyond repair
It's not your fault that I am unhappy
I told her that I was willing to work on us, but that won't always be the case. She angrily replied I know!

This weekend at ball, she followed me into the dugout to show me pics and talk about her day with her mom. She hasn't been doing that for a while. Little sign maybe? I didn't talk to her much at school conferences. After child support was set up, no more D talk has occurred, 3 weeks ago.

Me:
Crying less, smiling more
Made many new friends, and became closer to others
Living on my own for the first time ever
Less angry, not drinking
Being a more involved dad
Realize it's not all my fault, in fact this decision is hers alone
Will not live in an unhappy M, would have took her back regardless a month ago
Working on detachment

DB stuff:
Become the best me (only a fool would leave)
Have fun and GAL more, finally starting to enjoy it!
Realize she has a lot of work to do now to get me back too
Know that I will be ok, either way
Finally realize that I have to be happier with myself to be more attractive and fun to be with
Cannot waste my life waiting on her. Still hope we come back together, but won't wait forever.



Wish I never got to this point, but using it to better myself.


35
3 boys
Not my circus, not my monkeys anymore....
dday #2614729 10/12/15 03:15 PM
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Sandi wrote:
Sometimes, a couple has to have distance and time away from each other before they can live together. Using that period of time for each of them to heal separately. Then they have to heal as a couple. Before you throw in the towel, why not consider that route? 

I hope that is where I am at! I loved just reading that, I needed it!


35
3 boys
Not my circus, not my monkeys anymore....
dday #2614731 10/12/15 03:19 PM
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Just letting you know Im still reading along. Youve been getting good advice and using it well. Keep putting one foot in front of the other.

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Thanks az. You have helped me a lot as well


35
3 boys
Not my circus, not my monkeys anymore....
dday #2614734 10/12/15 03:26 PM
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Yeah I don't think I have much to offer...I'm still following for inspiration and to learn from all of the positive things you've done. Thanks again!

tl2 #2614846 10/12/15 07:33 PM
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Sorry that I am not more helpful on being an inspiration. The things that I do right, are usually luck or I have learned from another's mistake.

I'm not sure why, but I am becoming a little excited feeling (butterflies in the stomach,etc), like there is a change coming my way. I do feel differently every week. Growing. Changing. Gaining strength.

What a caterpillar calls the end, God calls a butterfly. Saw that on a church board this week, and it seems to be fitting. Change is in the air?


35
3 boys
Not my circus, not my monkeys anymore....
dday #2614946 10/13/15 12:23 AM
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Bittersweet day today with the boys. They go back to W tomorrow. Have been having fun, with a tremendous amount of rough housing. I take it that they missed me, and needed to wrestle. Went to bbq joint and grabbed wings. Normal tradition was to do that, and turn on football and feast in the living room in front of the tv. Just another reminder. (I don't even have cable to watch the games either) Then, while wrestling with s4, he started doing these little running jumping hugs. And started playing around while smootching. Both of these are things I did with W not that long ago. Tons of little reminders. We had a fun and playful M, before we were consumed by our kids and work, etc.

God, I miss that stuff!


35
3 boys
Not my circus, not my monkeys anymore....
dday #2614953 10/13/15 12:34 AM
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D- I often get butterflies in my tummy and an excited feeling right before something changes. It's happening right now, as a matter of fact.

I never know if the change will be good or bad, but I'm hoping for both of us...GOOD!


Me: 48 H: 50 - Married 21 - 3-S: 29,19,19 2-D: 27,26
BD: 08/2015 - D filed & OW disc: 09/2015

"Surrender to What Is, Let Go of What Was, Have Faith in What Will Be." -S Ricotti
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