Feeling down. Have had to fight back tears a couple times. Haven't had that in a while. I have counseling today, and I am sure that will help me. I just don't understand this. Wish I had a time machine...
35 3 boys Not my circus, not my monkeys anymore....
After a pep talk, I feel a little better. I have counselor, and then my sister invited me over again for dinner. So, I have things to do tonight. (Need to pay rent too, but that is not so much fun) Tomorrow we have 2 ball games. Then Thursday we start fall break. I realize that I keep having expectations. That is why I feel down today. Any suggestions on how to not have them?
35 3 boys Not my circus, not my monkeys anymore....
Counseling went well. But, his advice conflicts with DB. His thought was to ask W how she is doing with the D stuff, and see if she has changed her position yet. W knows that I was all in, the last time we had M talk. My question is: since they knew that we want the M to be great, they do know all they have to do is admit they want to work on it. Right? Do they ever think that maybe the lbs is too far gone to even ask about reconciliation?
Thoughts?
35 3 boys Not my circus, not my monkeys anymore....
I do not want to tell you what to do but I can tell you that I will never bring up divorce again to my wife. I did it a few times in the spring, never again. I will speak of it no more. If she wants a divorce she can bring up the conversation.
I believe your wife knows your position. I used to restate my position once or twice a month. Each time I did my wife would say I know. After a while I felt silly restating it.
I would like to think that if they want to stay in the marriage they would at least give us a hint. I guess some walk away spouses might give up because they perceive the marriage "totaled". I think I would worry more about the second part more then the first part.
Counseling went well. But, his advice conflicts with DB. His thought was to ask W how she is doing with the D stuff, and see if she has changed her position yet. W knows that I was all in, the last time we had M talk. My question is: since they knew that we want the M to be great, they do know all they have to do is admit they want to work on it. Right? Do they ever think that maybe the lbs is too far gone to even ask about reconciliation?
Thoughts?
In my opinion, if she had changed her position, you would know. I don't see how doing what he says is at all going to be beneficial. Even if she is thinking about changing her position, you asking the question is going to scare her off and lead to a "no".
Thanks guys. I still feel that she knows what I want... even though I have quit saying it. I just don't want to screw up anymore than I already have. She isn't bringing up any D talk, which I think is good. She hasn't stopped it, but she isn't pushing anything right now either. I'm just trying to cover every base, I guess
35 3 boys Not my circus, not my monkeys anymore....
I haven't read your entire thread, so please forgive me if I'm asking questions that you've already covered...
What was her childhood like? Did she have both her parents around? I'm wondering where her position of wanting to leave has come from; eg is/was there someone influential in her life that portrayed the concept to her that if she is unhappy, it's better to walk away than to try and fix?
I haven't read your entire thread, so please forgive me if I'm asking questions that you've already covered...
What was her childhood like? Did she have both her parents around? I'm wondering where her position of wanting to leave has come from; eg is/was there someone influential in her life that portrayed the concept to her that if she is unhappy, it's better to walk away than to try and fix?
Have you ever tried to pet a hurt animal?
Comfort it and told it that if you loved it the animal would feel better?
Me 34, XF 27 Many years together Son 4 Engaged Not engaged Many false starts by XF 7/16 new girlfriend comes into my life 2/17 girlfriend moves in my home
