Happy Monday Morning DB'ers. Let's see what this week brings for all of us...
My weekend was great, spent most of it with a meditation group and then speaking about the experience with the rest of the people there. It was not the classical meditation that I am used to but had a theme. I chose to meditate on my issue with trust, especially trust around women and my W.
I got a lot of insight into the fear I had around her ability to hurt me as I felt that it had happened so often prior to us getting married. This made me not believe her when she told me about her own experiences and I ran anything that had the possibility of being negative through the lens that it was just an excuse for her to potentially leave me. Was not a strong position to live from and is something I'm going to speak more with my IC about.
No dog pick up this weekend, our schedules didn't match up but my W told me she'd be back in my town this week and wanted to drop him off to me then. When I told her that wasn't a problem at all she said she was relieved as she had expected me not to trust that she wasn't just trying to keep him from me a bit longer! How apropos given the theme of the mediation sessions.
She also asked if I would share with her some of my experiences of the weekend. I'm not sure how to do without it sounding like pursuit as it relates to our past together and my coming to understand how I could have done it better. Zues has talked about couching things as "how I will act in my next relationship". I also believe that in DB we're supposed to let our WAW's do most of the talking.
Any thoughts on this would be appreciated.
Here's to a good week for everyone.
PP
M 39 W 36 T5 M3 BD - 1/15 Separated - Same Day Served 9/15 D finalized 6/17
I know that my H has asked me before about some of the things that I have done to keep doing well, even with what he's doing to me. (And yes, he has said that) I tend to just tell him it in generalities and will recommend a book to him or a site. Then I detach and let him take what he wants from my experience.
Does that make sense?
E
M 46 / H 43 T 24/M 18 S 4 11/6/2014 ILYBNILWY 1/16/2015 Living in separate bedroom 1/8/2016 H moved out
Your reflections on YOUR life How you feel about Woofie The experience of meditation and how you have done this Your health and wellbeing The joys in your life
Then expect reciprocation, use humour
V
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
I know that my H has asked me before about some of the things that I have done to keep doing well, even with what he's doing to me. (And yes, he has said that) I tend to just tell him it in generalities and will recommend a book to him or a site. Then I detach and let him take what he wants from my experience.
Does that make sense?
E
Makes senses, thanks Elly. I'm not sure what she wants to know about the weekend, she asked what theme I sat with and I told her that it was trust. She said she'd like to hear more about my experience when we meet next.
M 39 W 36 T5 M3 BD - 1/15 Separated - Same Day Served 9/15 D finalized 6/17
Your reflections on YOUR life How you feel about Woofie The experience of meditation and how you have done this Your health and wellbeing The joys in your life
Then expect reciprocation, use humour
V
Thank you V, this was very helpful. I keep having to tell myself to stick to DB principles. That this isn't an opportunity to vent to her that whether I trusted her or not, she still left...
I'll share what I learned, and how it effects my current life, not about how our M was. Very good reminder V.
PP
M 39 W 36 T5 M3 BD - 1/15 Separated - Same Day Served 9/15 D finalized 6/17
