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Joined: May 2015
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PP,

Agree with Matt, a breather is actually needed IMO. I have been feeling this lately as well, so much focus on GAL that GAL itself becomes exhausting. A night or two at home with a few beers, good tunes, laundry, cleaning and such is actually enjoyable for me now.

Also feel you on the Dog bit. Mine are cats, but I told W way back when that she was the one leaving so she forfeited any pet privilege. I hope you're able to work something out with this.


Me:36 W:30
M:2.75 T:7
BD: 4/2015
ILYBNILWY: 5/2015
W Moved Out: 5/2015
W filed for D: 7/2015
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Hey PigPen thinking about you and sending good thoughts your way. I am also in a custody battle over dogs. I have two and she has one. She doesn't seem to care one bit about the two she left behind, which I struggle to accept. She was so close to them. I really don't know who this new person is. I am doing a good job detaching and don't want to break no contact over this. I am finally getting a little pursuit from her.

Hang in there!


Me: 33 W: 30
T - 12 M - 3
K - 0
BD - 6/14/15
Moved out - 6/14/15
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Thanks guys, back to basics this week - meditation, journaling, light workouts, lots of breathing.

Not taking things too seriously and having arguments with my W in my head over our dog.

Detach, enjoy life, be of service to others. Those are my goals for the week.


M 39 W 36
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Served 9/15
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And I heard back from my W regarding getting my dog back for two months. I'm so grateful for DB'ing because I now can look past her charm and beauty and see the head high pile of horseshit that was in her email. Prior to DB I was terrified of making a move that would upset her and it tainted how I viewed everything. Here's the most amazing part:

"I think if we were to ask him (the dog), he'd say he just wants to stay with me. So I hope we can just make this easy. If you agree, you can come down and see him every once in a while."

Seriously, this is the most brilliant woman I have ever met, and I mean that without sarcasm. I've watched her destroy people in business meetings and do so with a smile.

This is a woman that turned down Playboy to go into medicine. The combo of brains and beauty is too much for most people to handle...and maybe it used to be for me but come on, if we were to ask the dog - are you serious?!


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PP,

I would respond:

"I think it's important that we focus on having some individual time with the dog. As you can imagine, we both love the dog very much. I propose that we come up with a fairly equitable schedule. I would like to pick up the dog and keep him with me for 1 week and then drop him off with you for the next two to three weeks? Naturally, we would ensure that food, toys and other comforts are packed for him. Thoughts? Thanks- PP."

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Thank you Wonka, I'm not going to write anything back today. I'm still a bit speechless.

Is there a reason why you think 1 week on 2-3 weeks off is better than a month or two? Is it to increase our interactions? I was hoping to get him back for an extended period so he gets used to being back with me.

I'm happy to post more about from the email if you think it will help. It was a full page full of all kinds of explanations why her keeping him is the best solution and why I should agree with her on it.

Do I need to address any of those?


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PP
If you asked the dog, you would get 'woof' . It's all temp checking again.

If it were me I think I would just say what you want and put dates in black and white. I will pick up woof on xxxxx and drop him off on xxxxxx. Please advise if you have a schedule in mind. Then like Mozza does with his kids propose an online schedule. He recommended a good system to HeavyD must go look it up.

Ignore the verbiage.

V

Last edited by Vanilla; 07/20/15 11:50 PM.

Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose.
V 64, WAW


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Originally Posted By: PigPen

Is there a reason why you think 1 week on 2-3 weeks off is better than a month or two? Is it to increase our interactions? I was hoping to get him back for an extended period so he gets used to being back with me.


You've got to start somewhere, PP. I think having the dog 1 week is a good plan. No, it is not to increase your interactions. It is to state clearly that you want to spend time with the dog. Ms. Wonka and I did the dog switcheroo about once a month due to living more than 600 miles apart. I presume that you and W live less than 500 miles apart...??

You don't need to make a counterpoint for every point W made in her email to you. This isn't a fencing competition..ya know. Short, concise, and succinct. You take charge by saying you want x, y, and z.

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Beautiful, thank you Wonka, and V.

Big hugs to you both.

PP


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Originally Posted By: Vanilla
PP
If you asked the dog, you would get 'woof' .
V


This is the most brilliant thing that's ever been written. Thank you V.


Me:38 XW:38
T:11 years M:8 years
Kids: S14, D11, D7
BD/Move out day: 6/17/14, D final Dec 15
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