WOW Came home from work had stopped off and picked up my dinner, ,,, Walk in door and H is home he is grilling steaks and I said "oh I thought you were at work"..."are we having company" He said "don't make a big deal of it,,,I just wanted to tell you that I appreciate the great mother you are to our son and that I know you are a good woman"
He then ask if I wanted to invite another couple over for dinner,,,
I was speechless, I said I could not think of anyone to invite over last minute...
I offered him some of the meal I had picked up,,,told him thank you and that this is very nice.
I did my workout, showered and now waiting on dinner.
1) I hope my food is not poisoned (joking,,,I hope) 2) I know that some MLC's get really nice before they drop another nasty surprise bomb.
But I will be sure to NOT make a big deal of it (part of why I declined to invite another couple) and I will enjoy the food and his company.
BUT I will have my eyes wide open!!!! I have no idea what is really going on or what this is all about.
TOO bad I cannot just sit back and really enjoy it without the doubts!!!!
Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015) H 51 (ring off 7/2013) M 2007 T 1996 S 14 July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
Enjoy the meal. It's not often a mlcer will go out of his way and prepare a meal. Sometimes there is no reason for what they do.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Wow 2B, that was really nice of your H, especially his comment. Try not to question his niceness. It's what you want more of, right? And you don't want him to sense your wariness or doubts, otherwise he may stop doing it.
Enjoy the moment, he wouldn't do those nice things if he didn't want to. MLC is all about selfishness, so when he breaks that mold with you, I don't see any harm in letting him know how much it means to you. As for you, enjoy it! Don't worry about when or if he will reach out again. Take it for what it is at that moment
It's one step at a time, one day at a time.
Me 48 H 46 S 11 M 2004 BD 8/13 H moved out 2/15 -live in the present, enjoy the beauty around and within you, explore your new future-
Dinner was great, H even had one of my fav wines chilled and ready. We watched a stand up comedy and H laughed more then I've heard him laugh in long time. We talked about s15 just a little bit. H told me about one of his buddies at work, a new friend.
I enjoyed the night with H, and I did let him know that it was very nice and Thanked him.
After ML, H did not run to his basement and hide, he stayed in our bed.
I noticed yesterday also that H has more eye contact with me now, for some time he was avoiding eye contact with me...just something I observed.
I did not make a BIG deal of it last night, and I will continue on as I have been.
Hmmm,,,hate that I'm still thinking "what is he up to" "what/when is the next nasty bomb drop"
Oh well
Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015) H 51 (ring off 7/2013) M 2007 T 1996 S 14 July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
I'm glad the evening went well and he stay upstairs! LOL!
Continue as you have been and let's see what he does next.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
H just had a TV lil melt down, so the TV in our bedroom has gone out. He ask me to go purchase another TV...I ask some questions ask him to move old TV and he storms into room and starts yanking TV, i was like he is a foolish person, told hin to stop before he messes up furniture, he said he does not have time to look for a TV and he needs the TV to sleep (always sleep with tv on)... I raised my voice told he him was acting crazy over a tv and to go on to work. WTh
Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015) H 51 (ring off 7/2013) M 2007 T 1996 S 14 July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
Some people react that way and it's not because they are all in MLC. Could have been something else was stressing him, but...
He probably got stressed out because you were asking questions and he thought you were possibly challenging him about moving the old TV versus going out to get a new one. It could have also been that he thought you were wanting him to go purchase the TV and he didn't have the time to go get one today.
They do have those little temper tantrums and I call them "teething". He'll be fine in a little bit.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Job Yeah, he was usually calm and cool BD. He was speaking very loud, it was more then normal MLC or not.
He was saying he did not have time, but I was not asking him to get a TV today he was the one who had to have the TV replaced today.
Now anything else breaks around the house he waits until it has to be fixed or replaced or becomes dangerous there are several things need fixed or replaced that is more important than a TV,...bathroom window has a crack...just one example.
Later s15 said he thought we were arguing, that is how loud H was talking and stomping atound about a TV,
OH WAIT, just remember before TV issue H was committing about how busy Ive been and that I always have events to attend, I had been snarky in reply and told him I had stuff planned wed-sunday next week,
Soooo maybe this is really what the outburst about the TV was really about?
Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015) H 51 (ring off 7/2013) M 2007 T 1996 S 14 July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
Job Yeah, he was usually calm and cool BD. He was speaking very loud, it was more then normal MLC or not.
He was saying he did not have time, but I was not asking him to get a TV today he was the one who had to have the TV replaced today.
Now anything else breaks around the house he waits until it has to be fixed or replaced or becomes dangerous there are several things need fixed or replaced that is more important than a TV,...bathroom window has a crack...just one example.
Later s15 said he thought we were arguing, that is how loud H was talking and stomping atound about a TV,
OH WAIT, just remember before TV issue H was committing about how busy Ive been and that I always have events to attend, I had been snarky in reply and told him I had stuff planned wed-sunday next week,
Soooo maybe this is really what the outburst about the TV was really about?
Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015) H 51 (ring off 7/2013) M 2007 T 1996 S 14 July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
The TV is very important to him because it's "white noise" and he has to have it on in order to sleep. This "white noise" is very important to him. To him, the other stuff is "fluff" and not as important because they do not impact his sleep.
He was in a funk over the broken set and didn't think that you were asking questions, not telling him to get a new set. Communications were dropped during this exchange because he misinterpreted what you were asking of him.
Your snarky reply could have set him off as well. Really, no one knows what stirs up those angry emotions for these guys. One minute they are calm and the next they've blown up over something minor.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
