Things have been pretty same ole same ole around the loony bin.
Heading off to wedding this weekend with H family. He has been running around like crazy to get ready to go, its like mass confusion with H. Now last minute he wants to buy a gift, not just give gift cards and expects me to run around. NOPE told him he can go get it, I mention something 2 weeks ago, no response, then when I said how much are we putting in card 2 days ago he said he wants to get a gift off registry.
I have not included in my day tomorrow to go get a gift, so I told him he can pick one up when we get into town day before wedding and get it wrap. He will need to be involved in this last minute decision.
He drove s14(will be s15 tomorrow) crazy with picking out his outfit, son hated the pants, so I purchased him a different pair, Yes, H is still trying to dress us all for this wedding.
Anyway, need to stop read some posts and see what everyone is up to. I have not been posting much lately, I just don't have the energy to put into this mess with H. I'm mentally in a great place and I pray I can stay here.
Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015) H 51 (ring off 7/2013) M 2007 T 1996 S 14 July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
OH, so I don't wear my wedding ring when out with H, just a choice, I wear it most other times.
So for this upcoming wedding, H's nephfew I might wear my wedding ring with H even though he does not wear his. I just find it easier to wear to avoid questions and looks. BUT hmmm,,,Its up for debate. ON 2nd thoughts, why pretend for his family? Hmmm,,,if I leave it at home, it will not be an option.
Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015) H 51 (ring off 7/2013) M 2007 T 1996 S 14 July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
Happy, You sound good and grounded. I think you did the right thing in advising him that if he wanted to give a gift, he could get it. In today's world, many new couples like money and/or gift cards so that they can purchase what they want and when they need it. But, if he wants to purchase a gift, so be it. LOL!
He's having a difficult time getting himself put together for this wedding...isn't he? You would think he was the Best Man or something and not just a guest. Talk about putting on a dog and pony show. Oh, well, maybe he will run himself ragged and finally settle down once he gets there.
You, on the other hand, are very cool, calm and collected and will look smashing! I do hope that you can enjoy the wedding and have some fun. Whether you wear your ring or not, it's up to you.
Travel safely and have some fun.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Yes, I'm really feeling like I'm in a good place and I want to stay here for a while.
I spoke to mother of the groom and she also said the couple will be very happy with money and or gift cards. Oh well, let H run crazy for a gift. I will be relaxing with my sisnlaw and enjoying being away from home for a lil bit.
S15 and I are pretty packed and ready to GO.
H, poor thing has like 2 suits he is taking he cannot decide before he leaves home. SMH.
Also H has been home every evening this week with us, since his work schedule changed this week, and thank GOD I'm in a good place. It has not cause me much stress, not like I expected with him being here right after work.
Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015) H 51 (ring off 7/2013) M 2007 T 1996 S 14 July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
So ride down great, saturday with H family great, wedding great. H wore his ring to wedding. i noticed as we went out door, i ran back and got mine We danced took pictures today, H had his arm around me called me babe.
This could be all pretend for his family, but I went with it, with the knowledge that once home we will/probably/might be back hard core full into MlC land.
But this weekend we were husband and wife and I enjoyed it.
Getting on road back home tomorrow.
Roller coaster is high up now, but thia not my first time at rodeo, on way home I will tighten my seat belt and get ready for the long drop down.
Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015) H 51 (ring off 7/2013) M 2007 T 1996 S 14 July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
Oh I PRAYED with my H and s15 that we would have a great trip, and we would communicate well and understand each other.
And my prayers were answered.
Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015) H 51 (ring off 7/2013) M 2007 T 1996 S 14 July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
Ok, kinda weird H is still using "babe" again when referring to me.
H is being VERY sweet to me, agreeing with anything, not debating anything I'm saying.
Oh shoot what is going on, strapping myself in, putting on my steel toe boots, putting on a helmet...not sure what is going on, but I know better then to let my guard down.
Ring update: He did only wear his ring to the wedding, that day only and not since. I wore my ring that day also ( normally I wear my ring whenever I'm not with H, LOL)
Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015) H 51 (ring off 7/2013) M 2007 T 1996 S 14 July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
Happy, Enjoy the time that he's being VERY sweet to you and agreeing w/everything. Why? Because tomorrow he could be moody and nasty.
I do agree...keep your guard up.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Wedding ring situations can be so weird. After my BD, I took off my wedding ring and showed up at a school event without it. H got upset and said we should still be wearing our rings? So we do even though he told me he was "done with me." H also had a poor upbringing and focuses on keeping up appearances.
I am in a similar sitch as this week H is so normal. Since last Friday he has been "playing house." Like you I know something crazy must be brewing. I am trying to enjoy the respite.
Me 41, H 47, M 15 yrs, S11, S13 BD 1: 11/4/14 we work on it; really I pretzel myself BD 2: 3/31/15 H goes down to "dorm room" 8/15: H back to MBR 10/15: H back in dorm room 1/18: H files, now divorced
So there is this jazz festival this weekend, and I love jazz and I want to go Saturday & Sunday.
I'm planning to invite my GF and to see if S15 wants to go with me. THEN I thought if H came home and said he was going to festival and did not ask me, I would put on my DB face, smile and tell him to have a great time, but inside I would be a lil hurt that he did not ask me.
BUT I know we are not in that place right now. But then I thought should I ask H, since I would want him to invite me?
Then, I got mad, about this whole situation, I mean I have a H on paper ONLY, I don't want no paper H. So then I was like I'm ready to end this whole mess, ready to tell H time is up, either work on this M or get ready to move out and get a D!!!!
I would love to be able to go to Jazz festival with H and s15, listen to music, and enjoy ourselves...
Oh I had sent him a text message the other day about a concert next Feb, ask if he wanted to go and there was NO response back on that topic. He has been working OT since we got back, but he found time to ask me to hang his shirts up and to ask me to see if there was a community yard sale this weekend....so since he did not reply to that invite at all. SO I already moved onto my GF to see if she wanted to go.
I guess I kinda know I should just plan this festival outings with my GF's and son, and leave it alone.
Back to the whole messed up situation, it's times like these when I want my H to enjoy things with me and I know I can not depend on that, cannot expect that from him.
It's times like these that I feel like I need to force the issue, cause I feel like my H could continue like we are for way longer then I want to/should/ or need to.
Maybe it's time for some R talk, H is all comfy with the way things are, no pressure, he has his wife and son and a nice home, a job good and that is what the world sees and he is happy putting on that show.
I feel like I'm the only one really "dealing" with the realness of this whole mess. I don't think H feels much of anything about this situation.
I'm tired of my H and this situation, and in typing out this post, I will not invite H to the jazz festival I will invite my friends and my son and keep moving forward.
I really only thought to invite H because he has limited working hours this weekend since he is in training and he will be around the house more then usual this weekend, and I thought back to a while ago when he mentioned/hinted about me not inviting him places...
Maybe he can be home for the community yard sale?
OK, I'm all over the place with this invite.
Heck, I'm all over the place about this whole entire marriage, but I'm know for sure 100% sure Im tired and I'm getting closer each day to wanting a decision, work on marriage or get a D.
Ok, need advice, need support? Please and Thanks
Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015) H 51 (ring off 7/2013) M 2007 T 1996 S 14 July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
