Hi Sherman. Just my pennies worth but basically she is starting to relalise about the money thing. The dream is starting to unravel and she can't understand why
Money is something you as a family had Now reality is starting to bite. Protect yourself and your S and keep on keeping on
I wonder how I will cope but then I live very modestly and am prepared to move slowly forward. WW will no doubt want a W lifestyle and to keep the assets and leave the debts behind.
Only time will tell.
V
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
On 5/14, STBXW declined to have S7 for one night on her weekend. She's running and needed to "train" for a race coming up. I was happy to have him stay with me. I had plans but it was easy to include S7. There were kayak demos (40 different kayaks to try) that I was going to check out. I brought his little kayak with us. At first he was a bit intimidated, but soon was paddling circles around the adults. We got to tray a lot of different things. One of his favorites was a kayak with a flipper mechanism and another was the standing board.
On 5/19, STBXW demanded that I take the wedding rings and sell them for her. I told her no. That she's perfectly capable of selling them herself if that's what she wants to do. She stated that since I didn't help her sell the rings, that she will now be coming for my firearms and ammunition. I told her that if she needs help she can ask me, but she cannot demand it and that I won't help her with the way she's going about it.
She's also complaining about having to "catch up" payments on the accounts she was directed to cover back at the end of February or the beginning of March. The bills were mostly due at the end of the month and we formally separated early/mid-March. On the items she complains about in her texts, I last made the payments in February. I communicated that these were her responsibility several times verbally when we were discussing the budget and via several emails when I shared the budget sheets with her. She's even stated that she only has $5.00 for gas. If so, the OM must be floating her money... I wonder how long that will last?
Her last paycheck was deposited into the joint bank account on 03/13/15 which covered joint bills to that point. After which she had her check direct deposit changed to somewhere else, besides our joint checking. So I didn't have any funds from her to make any payments on her behalf. Additionally, she was purchasing a significant amount of clothing which consumed our normally available funds. Instead of making the payments to her accounts at the end of March, she put down the money on an apartment and moved out of the marital home.
When she dropped off S7, I gave her the original ring box to assist her with selling the rings. She asked "how does this help me?". I shrugged. I then told her that "I didn't ask for any of this". Her reply was "So?". I shut the car door at that point. S7 jumped up for me to hold him and we went into the house. She drove off when we were half way across the driveway. She sent some nasty texts a little later stating that regardless of whether I asked for this or not, that I still had to pay... that she expects the judge to be fair. <- I don't think she knows what fair in this case is really going to look like for her.
On 5/22, we were heading out on a fishing trip with a friend at his cottage for the weekend. I was even able to take FS9 with us and the kayaks. So both boys had a great time... fishing, kayaking, swiming, chasing frogs, hanging out, exploring, sandcatstles, etc... just good boy adventures. They even got to try some of the fish that was caught. Anyway, STBXW decided to send the following texts when we were driving to the cottage on the 1st day... The kicker is the 2nd one.
STBXW: Hey when I am able to purchase the external drive I will want pics and docs off computer. Also can you put the education worksheets/binders and other stuff I left to the side for me to pick up Tuesday night? I plan to have S7 earn money at my house with homework and reading again.
STBXW: If he continues on the path he is on then he will be disappointed when he realizes the rest of the world doesn't think he is as special as his daddy thinks he is. His education is key.
I didn't even bother to respond until Tuesday before she picked up S7. And then I told her nothing will be ready for her to pickup. I'm not sure what she put the side either and she can't really tell me. She dumped a lot of crap all over the place as she was making her departure.
Also, one more things... for Mother's day S7 did some pages for Mom. There was one that was a picture of a bouquet, but was was completely fill in the blank. That one is addressed to dad and lists out all the reasons he loves me... completely trumped everything else. I made copies and have one in my office at work.
Best part is... he gave it to her initially and she REALLY wasn't happy about it. She's been super nice to him recently... but I got a few text messages about it.
Last edited by Sherman333; 05/27/1505:20 PM.
Me: 45 W43 S7, Foster S9 (Planning to adopt post divorce) D mentioned Feb 2015, Wife served 3/24/2015. She moved out 4/15/2015.
Hi Sherman Your being the best dad you can be and that's the most important thing Your W sounds like a real nightmare Stay strong and keep on putting S7 first
She has her moments... Especially when all this really started to go bad. I got out in front of her and was able to minimize some of behavior. She has emotional issues that really came out.
Now it's just counting down... Pre-trial is in Sept.
I'm expecting more crazy stuff to come the closer we get.
Me: 45 W43 S7, Foster S9 (Planning to adopt post divorce) D mentioned Feb 2015, Wife served 3/24/2015. She moved out 4/15/2015.
It makes my heart break to know that S7 has a nutcase for a mother. I do hope you have some good platonic female friends so S7 can learn how to be around emotionally healthy women for he will need to learn how to pick a good woman for a wife.
I do hope you have some good platonic female friends so S7 can learn how to be around emotionally healthy women for he will need to learn how to pick a good woman for a wife.
I know. Over the last several years and a couple of moves... a lot of the friends (male & female) went by the wayside. STBXW's behavior didn't help.
But there are a few and I'm actively cultivating new friends. I even created a local meetup group to get parents together. I've also been engaging people through church. It's going to take a bit of time, but I think it will all come.
For my next significant other, I'll have to be very careful in who I pick.
Me: 45 W43 S7, Foster S9 (Planning to adopt post divorce) D mentioned Feb 2015, Wife served 3/24/2015. She moved out 4/15/2015.
So I got a call from the Foster agency. Looks like my former fosters son's placement isn't working out. I knew she was having trouble weeks ago and told her I still had a strong interest in adopting him. But it would have to happen after the divorce.
She must have mentioned it to the agency. They inquired about whether I'd still be interested... I of course said yes. They're sending me the paperwork to fill out to reopen my license.
Looks like I'll have 2 boys shortly.
I'll make sure that the STBXW doesn't have visitation rights and that I don't have another dependent before everything is final.
But it's happy news.
Me: 45 W43 S7, Foster S9 (Planning to adopt post divorce) D mentioned Feb 2015, Wife served 3/24/2015. She moved out 4/15/2015.
Awesome news Sherman. I'm sure S7 will be excited also, It always amazes me how much good you do in their lives with the situation your going through. Keep up that great work.
Accept what is, let go of what was, and have faith in what will be
I had plans but it was easy to include S7. There were kayak demos (40 different kayaks to try) that I was going to check out. I brought his little kayak with us. At first he was a bit intimidated, but soon was paddling circles around the adults. We got to tray a lot of different things. One of his favorites was a kayak with a flipper mechanism and another was the standing board.