Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
I'm about to leave work and will be back online in about 1 hour.
I wanted to get this out there. After my text last night, I didn't expect to hear from my W. Well, about 15 minutes ago I got this (took her S1, D1 and S2 names out). How should I reply? We still have the older DVD player. real short and cordial like "Consider it done" or . . . I'm not sure guys.
W's text: By the way, would you please disconnect the DVR for me because I would probably mess it up and because it was given to us by (HER KIDS) - it should be mine and I could use it now. Thank you. W
Help again, please!
Bob
Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
I think you have to be one of the most loving people I have ever known. Always there for me and others! Gosh, I wish we could somehow meet someday!
I like that response, Wonka. Not over-doing it with kindness. Had I, for example, replied with "Consider it done!" that shows too much emotion, right? Or being overly-friendly, etc. She'd probably see right thru it.
Thank you so much for your quick reply. I am a little "down" today because it hit me that my W filed for D 7 months ago today. I know there are people on this forum going thru it much longer than I have but it still hurts. Then I get the text about the DVD player. Makes it seem like she'll never change her mind, but I realize that's where she's at now mentally. Monday, I have to remember -- no expectations, no following W around, no R talk.
Back to your suggested reply, that's what I'll send her. I think I'll wait until tomorrow. Heck, I'm busy trying to help others on this forum.
Many, many *Hugs* to you.
Bob
Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
Wonka is definitely good at this stuff. But to that point... I think there is a fine line about being overly enthusiastic and simply cordial or neutral. I have tried to utilize a more neutral position and I feel that perhaps lately it has initiated more of a response by her. That is mostly mind reading, and may or may not be true.
$0.02 in my pocket.
Me: 32 W: 29 T:8 M: 6 D4 S2 M - 8/2008 W is not happy - 1/2014 W wants D - 9/2014 W moved out - 11/2014 D filed - 1/23/2015 D'ed - 2/25/2015 Gave X the Letter - 11/10/2015
Thanks for checking in! Yes, neutral is best, certainly at this point.
You're the man.
Bob
Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
I am going to send the short text Wonka suggested in a few minutes:
"Sure, will do. No problem. Bob"
Wish me luck all.
Bob
Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
Good luck Bob! If only our WAS's knew that their messages had been proposed by some woman in the UK and edited by another, approved by someone else - they would be astonished!!
T :-)
T 13 M 7 Me 48 H 46 SS 15 BD 7.14 PA D final 5.16 (H filed)
We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
