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Skhdive, you know what?

YOU ALL ARE SO RIGHT!!!

I am just mad, mad and mad and instead of getting busy with myself, my work, my life, my kids, I am in one enormous agony because H this or that.

It's not worthy it. I need to let go. I know myself and I know I need to decide things. I don't really know how to separate the move forward or move on.

I am too black and white, it has helped me so much difficulties in my life, but this one is so hard to resolve this way.

You know I follow your thread since the beginning and yes I have seen all your mistakes and I am seeing you dealing with your sitch so well lately. You have been learning and getting stronger every day. You are doing an amazing job.

By the way, maybe it is a supreme work or not, but I went home at lunchtime and forgot my phone there. I can ask the kids to check on my messages but I won't ask them to text anything for me. So I am far away from my phone, like Toots asked me.

Thanks guys, it has been a heavy and hard day. I know it has been my choice to put myself in this situation today, because I know I can control only myself. I just get so mad time to time and today I am really, really mad.

But will go nowhere, mad or not I won't resolve anything. I can just resolve me no one else. And I should actually prepare myself, each time I pull away from H then he find a way to keep some subject on hold.

Yes, I need to go home and rest. Will finish work and will try to rest my head and not think about all this anymore.

Thanks my friends, you are all a treasure to me.

Pink


Pink17
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D:8/5/2015



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Hi RD,

I have a punch bag in the garage. My boys play football, so everyone punch the huge bag.

I am not practicing Karate right now, but always did, I have a Blue belt in Karate. I always use the bag to train punches and kicks. It may be a good idea. Hope H does not show up in a house when I am doing that or he will be the bag.

I will calm down. This is all very upsetting and I still have the infection in my eyes and it's hurting because I am all day in front of the computer screen.

Need to think about something nice like riding a bike with RD maybe, or preparing dinner with the help of all our kids in the kitchen. Wow, that would be crazy.

Thanks RD, you are a real gentleman,
Pink


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D:8/5/2015



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Hi Pink. Great about the phone , that should help. Karate as well !!!! You
Are the complete package ! ! !! Pink the bike ride will happen , for sure and it will be a blast

You have fantastic support on here and that should show you that you are regarded very highly on here and I think I would be right In thinking that's a general thing in your life

Throw yourself into work and try to relax back from the sitch for a few hours

Take care Rd

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Jornaling,

I am feeling a little less angry today, but still with a lot of frustration. I guess my mom has some input in the way I am behaving and feeling too. She has been saying that H is not all that so sad and that he is making his choices alone, probably no one has a gun to his head and blah, blah, blah.

I know she is saying what she thinks is right for me to hear and get her 100% support that it is OK to be D and move on.

Like everyone says here, it is want is happening, my mom loves me and does not want to see me loosing my precious time with this nonsense.

On H's front, no word from him in the house price negotiation, he asked a day and his cut time has expired. The frustration is that this kind of thing is not necessary, H can lower the prices if he wants or he can get a contractor to give him some idea in prices?

All what I am asking is to treat me as a normal buyer. I don't know what to do exactly what to do because he knows I need this info asap. I guess I will text him towards the end of the day and ask if he has an answer.

If he doesn't then I will let him know I will put the appraiser.

Later,
Pink


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Hi Pink Glad you feeling a bit better today and your right about your Mum , she's telling you what she thinks is best for you from her point of view however it's what Pinks feels is best for her and as much as your mum loves you she can't decide how long Pink should stand.

Re your H and house prices , I wouldnt contact him but give it another day and then get it done yourself

Can I just say that your H is acting like a fool and none of us know why , he could be in a MLC , he could be madly in love with someone else or he could just be mad. In my humble opinion he is in an MLC type of thing because no matter what he feels for wonderful Pink he wouldn't treat his boys like he is if he was thinking straight

I hope tomorrow is a better day again Pink and if you can just learn to expect nothing of H for the moment you won't get disappointed or sad.

Keep on being Pink and sharing your wonderful self with others. You give so much , I don't think you appreciate how much we all care about you and your crew !!!

Take care lovely Pink Rd. xx

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Hi Pink, sorry to hear that about your Mum. It's hard when that happens. My Dad has always seemed pretty supportive of H, but I think he would just like to see me move on now. You can understand it, and they get tired of seeing you hurting. But it's your M and you can only do what's right for you.

In a way, I don't even see standing as being about H any more. I'm not actually sure I want him back - certainly not new horrid him. It's more about doing it for me. Not bailing out of my M too soon when things got really rough. I think we will find peace through doing this and in a way it is an act of self love too.

I agree with RD about your H and the kids. I too believe he isn't thinking straight and that your sitch has a few twists and turns to take yet. But worry not, I'll be coming over soon to drive around town and sing a few songs in the car with you...

Take care lovely P!!


T 13 M 7
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We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
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Thanks RD and Toots,

H sent me a text after sitting on the subject for two days:

"I think the best thing to do is for you (or your lawyers) to send me by email a comprehensive summary of the proposed, true house value, min sell price, and each itemized repair to make the house suitable for sale. It would be helpful to have some real estate, no cost, comparable summary to support your proposed min. Sell price & quotes or estimates for the necessary repairs and landscaping. Thanks".

I did not send him any text yesterday. Today I got this message and did not answer. Instead, I called my lawyer and told him to set up an appointment with the appraiser that was set up by the court upon my request. This way we will have the right price, fair for both of us and no more back and forth with cheap talk.

I think I did right. The kids told me that he went to pick them up from school yesterday and he was very upset, kind of mad.

All what I know is that I need to get this done asap and have my own life back. I am so tired of living by all this court rules.

Hope is getting very slim. Once you are into this D process it feel that things are done for good. We will see what happens, but I feel like there is no more return from here.

Love you guys,
Pink


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Hi Pink, sounds like you did the right thing - leave it to the experts in matters like this I would say. So, your H may be mad, but I just think it's tough dealing with the reality of it all. My H acknowledged to me this week that he is finding it hard to face the legal stuff...

Try not to worry about H's reaction & just focus on being reasonable and moving forward yourself.

RD said to me recently that, whilst we may feel this is a point of no return, sometimes it is the very facing of brutal reality that can prompt a wake up. So who knows hey??...Have a good day Sweetheart xxx


T 13 M 7
Me 48 H 46
SS 15
BD 7.14 PA
D final 5.16 (H filed)

We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
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Hi Pink. Just to echo Toots. Let the experts deal with it and H has no reason to argue.

It's a tough time but it will get better. Stay strong for those boys of yours.

H will soon start to see reality and then we will see what happens

Take care. Rd

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Hi Pink. I hope you having a good day. Im just back from MAD MAX with the boys and checking to see who's posting.

I don't see anything from you so just checking in with you. Thinking about you and your sitch today and for me , you need to give your R sometime. I do t like how your H is treating you but I'm of the opinion that he's not thinking straight so while you need to detach and move on I would advise leaving the door open for H to come to his senses

With the house being valued and the D moving forward I hope that H starts to see reality for what it is. OW is a huge problem but Pink is a big enough person to find a way past and allow her heart to heal and move forward.

I admire you and Toots so much that I would love to advise you to tell H to go to hell but while that might give you short term satisfaction. It's the bigger picture you have to look at. You still love H , he's the father of your children and I can't believe he doesn't feel love for you somewhere in his fog

I hope I havnt over stepped the line but I wanted to say the above as you have been a great friend to me and lifted my spirits on more than o e occasion. Your M is worth every effort to save and I want you to to be able to look back in time and either say , I did every thing to save my M or I saved my M because I gave it my all

Ha e a good evening and take care. Rd

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