Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
I attend a Divorce Support Group, as I've mentioned before. This is someting from the group (daily e-mail) I'd like to share with all:
Divorce is like a tornado—ripping through your life, threatening to destroy everything in its path. The emotional whirlwinds bring fear, confusion, and despair, affecting you, your children, family members, and friends. You will likely wonder Why did this storm hit my life and why does it hurt so much?
Dr. Jim A. Talley says, “The reality is that divorce is the most painful thing you can go through because it impacts so much of your life. There’s no way around or easy way out. And everybody is looking for a painless way out of this whole situation.”
Bob
Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
I still have to go back to my texts with my W and look at your comments.
I'm heading to the Divorce Support Group soon.
i hope everyone on this forum is hanging in there!
Bob
Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
I attend a Divorce Support Group, as I've mentioned before. This is someting from the group (daily e-mail) I'd like to share with all:
Divorce is like a tornado—ripping through your life, threatening to destroy everything in its path. The emotional whirlwinds bring fear, confusion, and despair, affecting you, your children, family members, and friends. You will likely wonder Why did this storm hit my life and why does it hurt so much?
Dr. Jim A. Talley says, “The reality is that divorce is the most painful thing you can go through because it impacts so much of your life. There’s no way around or easy way out. And everybody is looking for a painless way out of this whole situation.”
Bob
Thanks for sharing, Bob. The pain is triple the tornado when it's done unilaterally by the WAS without TRYING every available tool/resource before calling it quits. I would also add that Dr. Tally is dead wrong when he says that "everybody is looking for a painless way out of this whole situation"...instead, he should qualify that the WAS is looking for a painless way to end the M.
As if a D is all cotton candy and popsicles in their minds.
Thanks for sharing, Bob. The pain is triple the tornado when it's done unilaterally by the WAS without TRYING every available tool/resource before calling it quits. I would also add that Dr. Tally is dead wrong when he says that "everybody is looking for a painless way out of this whole situation"...instead, he should qualify that the WAS is looking for a painless way to end the M.
As if a D is all cotton candy and popsicles in their minds.
Thank You Wonka! That is exactly what I needed to hear tonight.
Me:44 EXW 44 Wonderful Children M11, T14 BD 6/14 OM Confirmed Divorce Final 2/25/16 "It works if you work it!"
Wonka and Joe, thank you both for your time and posting.
Joe, I needed to hear that from Wonka, too.
BTW, Wonka, Sunday it will be 1 week on no contact with my WAW.
Try to take care, please!
Bob
Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
One thing I know my WAW fell in love with me about was my sense of humor. I can't think of many funny things lately, I'm sure you all can relate.
I have a question: Since my W said that I became "smothering" do you feel the next time I contact my W (at least a few more days staying dark) it would be appropriate to forward a meme (a cartoon that tells a story) to her that reads as follows:
Husband: I’ve been thinking . . .
I’m the man of this house, so starting tomorrow I want you to have a hot, delicious meal ready for me the second I walk through that door . . .
Afterwards, while watching ESPN and relaxing in my chair, you’ll bring me my slippers and then run my bath…And when I’m done with my bath, guess who’s going to dress me and comb my hair?
Wife's simple reply: The funeral director.
Then on the bottom it reads: Well Played!
I'd love to hear everyone's thoughts. My idea is to try to rebuild (slowly) with a little humor. Could this backfire on me by reminding her of why she left? I guess there's always a risk on anything we say, do or send to our WAW.
Bob
Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
Bob, I don't think this is a good idea. Best to put thoughts of contacting your W in the near future - about anything other than essentials - out of your mind. And I wouldn't start sending little jokes either.
I think in your sitch with the smothering feedback, you may well be best to stay dark for a little while. Do some stuff for yourself and focus on building up your own life. Stop worrying about what might be the best approach with your W, don't count days of NC and so on - just live your life....
T 13 M 7 Me 48 H 46 SS 15 BD 7.14 PA D final 5.16 (H filed)
We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
Bob, I don't think this is a good idea. Best to put thoughts of contacting your W in the near future - about anything other than essentials - out of your mind. And I wouldn't start sending little jokes either.
I think in your sitch with the smothering feedback, you may well be best to stay dark for a little while. Do some stuff for yourself and focus on building up your own life. Stop worrying about what might be the best approach with your W, don't count days of NC and so on - just live your life....
Hi Toots,
Thank you so much! Your advice is (I feel) always so good,
I will follow your recommendations -- they make good sense in my sitch.
Thank you for saving me from myself.
BTW, how are you?
Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
I would also add that Dr. Tally is dead wrong when he says that "everybody is looking for a painless way out of this whole situation"...instead, he should qualify that the WAS is looking for a painless way to end the M. 
