Believe it or not, I've actually heard reports on here -- MULTIPLE reports -- of wayward wives screaming at their betrayed husbands "YOU RUINED MY AFFAIR!!!"
That would be the icing. She asked me today. "And how do YOU know he doesn't care what's happening to our family? Hint lady; he's not helping when he's interacting with my wife behind my back.
Oh, and he's just " helping" her through this tough time.
A lot of these OM have other ladies they bed. A Wife or GF is just an easy lay. They don't care, and they are glad they have a supportive husband or bf to send them home to.
An easy way to blow it up is to show that he undeniably has other women.
During her spew, she told me she thought I have a lawyer and was going to start the divorce process, and would be the one leaving the house. I calmly told her I had a lawyer, yes, so I knew my legal rights and obligations, but I had no intent on filing for or paying for a divorce that I never wanted. She freaked and says now SHE'S $%&#@+- stressed over 'what I'm doing' and that I'm hurting the kids by making her be the one to file and find a place to live, away from a house their comfortable in. (I guess dad is suppose to accept the A, find a place to rent, pack, move, find money to buy furniture, ect.) Then she tells me she's been planning to leave since June/July, followed by "I don't have a plan to deal with this...at least I confirm my own thoughts, she had no intent to leave, until she got caught. She even said, that yes, if I didn't find out, she'd still be pretending we're good until her plan was ready...like I said tho, there was no plan. Got caught, now freaking out.
btw, this ^^^^ shows she's SPINNING. This is GOOD.
I noticed the complete change immediately. It was like a complete slap back to reality. As soon as I made the decision to be the LEADER as opposed to DOORMAT, in that moment, she was devastated and in tears.
It's a swing of power, and if it's quick enough will cause her physical pain and spin her around. Thing about it if you don't do it to her she is doing it to you if you pay her any mind.
I commend you on your strength. You can be stronger.
Believe it or not, I've actually heard reports on here -- MULTIPLE reports -- of wayward wives screaming at their betrayed husbands "YOU RUINED MY AFFAIR!!!"
That would be the icing. She asked me today. "And how do YOU know he doesn't care what's happening to our family? Hint lady; he's not helping when he's interacting with my wife behind my back.
Oh, and he's just " helping" her through this tough time.
A lot of these OM have other ladies they bed. A Wife or GF is just an easy lay. They don't care, and they are glad they have a supportive husband or bf to send them home to.
An easy way to blow it up is to show that he undeniably has other women.
He was a friend of mine. I was army, he was local bartender. He introduced us. Used to brag about sleeping with all the wait staff behind husband and boyfriends back. She knows this, but is 'in love'. I told her today, he IS no different,vthat he'sccheating now. She just defends him. So I say nothing. I'll be honest. I can't see him coming to our province to live with her and my kids. I seriously doubt it. And if he did? The bliss would last only so long I'd think...once my kids started rejecting him cuz daddy had to leave...or he cheated on her.
"Sometimes, if ones' words are not better than silence, once should be silent."
During her spew, she told me she thought I have a lawyer and was going to start the divorce process, and would be the one leaving the house. I calmly told her I had a lawyer, yes, so I knew my legal rights and obligations, but I had no intent on filing for or paying for a divorce that I never wanted. She freaked and says now SHE'S $%&#@+- stressed over 'what I'm doing' and that I'm hurting the kids by making her be the one to file and find a place to live, away from a house their comfortable in. (I guess dad is suppose to accept the A, find a place to rent, pack, move, find money to buy furniture, ect.) Then she tells me she's been planning to leave since June/July, followed by "I don't have a plan to deal with this...at least I confirm my own thoughts, she had no intent to leave, until she got caught. She even said, that yes, if I didn't find out, she'd still be pretending we're good until her plan was ready...like I said tho, there was no plan. Got caught, now freaking out.
btw, this ^^^^ shows she's SPINNING. This is GOOD.
I noticed the complete change immediately. It was like a complete slap back to reality. As soon as I made the decision to be the LEADER as opposed to DOORMAT, in that moment, she was devastated and in tears.
It's a swing of power, and if it's quick enough will cause her physical pain and spin her around. Thing about it if you don't do it to her she is doing it to you if you pay her any mind.
I commend you on your strength. You can be stronger.
Your right. Now I continue to detatch, and avoid consenting to conversation. She knows where I stand. That's it.
"Sometimes, if ones' words are not better than silence, once should be silent."
She'll be at home now. Maybe on the phone, maybe not. But I would hope after the row this a.m., she's got a lot to think about...well, until they talk tonight. He may not be supportive if she tells him SHE has to file, and SHE will have to find a place to live.
"Sometimes, if ones' words are not better than silence, once should be silent."
She'll be at home now. Maybe on the phone, maybe not. But I would hope after the row this a.m., she's got a lot to think about...well, until they talk tonight. He may not be supportive if she tells him SHE has to file, and SHE will have to find a place to live.
And maybe she'll (in time) come to realize that his involvement in our lives wasn't such a great idea. For now she knows, unequivocally. She has to $hit, or get off the pot, and live with whatever decision she makes.
Last edited by Mac00; 02/12/1510:48 PM.
"Sometimes, if ones' words are not better than silence, once should be silent."
She'll be at home now. Maybe on the phone, maybe not. But I would hope after the row this a.m., she's got a lot to think about...well, until they talk tonight. He may not be supportive if she tells him SHE has to file, and SHE will have to find a place to live.
And maybe she'll (in time) come to realize that his involvement in our lives wasn't such a great idea. For now she knows, unequivocally. She has to $hit, or get off the pot, and live with whatever decision she makes.
He was a friend of mine. I was army, he was local bartender. He introduced us. Used to brag about sleeping with all the wait staff behind husband and boyfriends back. She knows this, but is 'in love'. I told her today, he IS no different,vthat he'sccheating now. She just defends him. So I say nothing. I'll be honest. I can't see him coming to our province to live with her and my kids. I seriously doubt it. And if he did? The bliss would last only so long I'd think...once my kids started rejecting him cuz daddy had to leave...or he cheated on her.
Right. Wife could blame you... That's cracked up she knows she is stacked up with other ladies and doesn't care and defends him. That's how it is.
They say in the fish realm that in some species the brighter and livelier fish is the most attractive. In the case of two equally bright and lively fish the female fish will be more attractive to the fish that is the most promiscuous.
She'll be at home now. Maybe on the phone, maybe not. But I would hope after the row this a.m., she's got a lot to think about...well, until they talk tonight. He may not be supportive if she tells him SHE has to file, and SHE will have to find a place to live.
And maybe she'll (in time) come to realize that his involvement in our lives wasn't such a great idea. For now she knows, unequivocally. She has to $hit, or get off the pot, and live with whatever decision she makes.
MINDREADING.
Right. Instead of reading into it, we can worry about ourselves. Continue to strengthen and put the onus and focus and priority on ourselves.
The less attention we give a WAS the better. Not even a "nugglet" of attention...
