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At least you don't pay taxes on child support though - spousal support would be taxed.

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Ok. So, he will owe me $450 for October, $650 for November, $150 for December and 0 for January (if he comes through with the money he says is sending)...and $650 for February...

That will help. Alot.


"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man

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Just not as much as I thought. My attorney said spousal was a given because we were married so long...regardless of whether I was employed or not.


"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man

“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson
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I hope you get the back payments very soon. That money would help you play catch up on your finances. Did the lawyer say why you aren't getting spousal support? Any way that this can be revisited or is it completely dead in the water?


Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
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I will call about the car payment tomorrow morning. I now have a legal document explaining what's been going on.

Alright. Maybe I'm feeling a little relieved. I will have to earn my own spousal support. Bummer.

Chances are slim I would get any if we continued with the court case...right?


"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man

“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson
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My atty asked I schedule a phone meeting to discuss the temporary order and the settlement issue. I will ask then.


"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man

“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson
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It's probably not worth fighting over, but I would certainly raise the question w/your lawyer when you have your phone conference and then you can decide whether you want to continue fighting for it or letting it go, but remember you and only you can decide whether it is worth the headaches and yes, paying additional monies to your lawyer, etc.


Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
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I sent a text to Smokey this morning telling him that I advised me atty we want to settle. I asked we use the original dissolution papers I gave him in May of 2014.

He responded: Ok. I will call you on Wednesday morning. Go get busy editing.

I hate this whole...him sounding like old Smokey. It's confusing.

I didn't respond. Kept my focus on work.

I have more to do tonight. Why call me? There's no need to call me.


"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man

“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson
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You will discover now that things are perking about the divorce and you are willing to go w/the original dissolution papers, he will become more friendly and actually act like the old h. Why? Because the pressure is starting to lift and he's not having to fight w/you over the stuff any longer and yes, he sees himself being free of you, the marriage and the responsibilities of being married in a few short months. He's actually relieved, just as you will be once everything is signed sealed and filed.

He called because he's relieved and also happy to finally have things happening that will bring this marriage to an end. Sad, really when you think about it because he gave up so much, but like all of them, the rainbow is calling and their can never reach the rainbow and one day, hopefully, they'll all realize that.

Be careful when speaking to him tomorrow. It's a business deal and one that you will need to keep your business hat on for. Things could change very suddenly if he is still on a fact finding mission. Nothing has been signed/dated/filed yet. You can be friendly, but don't share too much of your life w/him. Stick to the financials and your daughters. What you are doing w/your life now is none of his business.


Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
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So true about keeping it business focused. Hang in there.


M:25 years at BD w/ 2 daughters
BD: 5/14
Separated 6/14 - H moved cross country w/OW
D Final 9/17

“I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.”
― Maya Angelou



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