I have my own post under newcomers, but I never asked this question and it seems relevant to me. What do you do when your walk-away spouse says they've "tried everything" over years to get through to you, but you know they only tried the same thing over and over again? For me, trying everything means research. It means hours of Google searches looking for similar problems and their solutions, comparing what I do now to what I did then, and new ways to approach things. If you know for a fact your spouse never tried this, is there a way to approach this with him/her, at any point? Or would this just be perceived as needy or unreasonable? Honest answers, please!
Hi NLV4EVR, while I agree with Cadet to stay on the one thread, I felt the need to answer this here. In my sitch, my W stated the same thing, she tried everything. Well the reality is no, she didn't try anything. Yes she complained, whenever there was an issue that I was at fault for. But the complaint was about that issue, not the marriage as a whole. Bottom dollar, it doesn't matter whether they tried numerous ways, the same way, or no ways, in their mind they tried everything. There is no way to approach them about this. Focus on working on you - while it took me a long time to get where I am, I am also very happy where I am now. I can only control me, no one else. Good luck NLV4EVR
ME:51 W:46 M:25 S:22, S:20 Divorced 16/9/15 BD 10/12 W left 12/12 with OW, affair confirmed Nov/12. Dark since 6/13 I"m in a new relationship since Feb 14.
