Here it is. A whole new dynamic. Some things remain... some things have changed.
I have to remember to keep my focus. I need to stay on my own path. I said what I needed to say. Over that.
Now, I need to get my kids on track. S17 has me on high alert. D13 is thriving, but I worry about all she internalizes.
And me. I need to focus on me. Keep on my path. Stay healthy. Surgery is this week. I keep forgetting about it. I just seems like an errand I have to run or something.
Wow, Mighty! So, he's moving out. X-mass shopping then packing...any idea what hww thinks as to why H is moving out? If she can't understand why you don't like her, she has to be the most clueless, no morals person in the world! Maybe she really doesn't get that sleeping with a married man and getting knocked up isn't a "good thing"?
At this point I really, really think that a DNA test needs to be done as soon as that kid is born. H had a vasectomy and the reversal apparently didn't take before all this started if I remember right. I really have a feeling that your kids may not be having any half-siblings! And if it turns out to not be his, than H can walk away and never look back. I think that's important no matter what happens in your M.
Enjoy mighty! Just be ready for more drama before all this is over!
Yes, Mighty. He's going to need an understanding friend. Or at least one that won't close the door and can LISTEN as things come up.
He acted the fool and he knows it or at least much of it. For at least a day, he has tried to make changes. But like an addict, it's not a day's work - it's a lot more than that.
All this time you spent with anger toward him - and now that dynamic is changing.
Likely the most difficult thing is going to be managing to help the kids with their emotions. Of any of you, they may cycle the hardest as change occurs. You knew that though, right?
And now that you believe us about the hww and how she's no prize? I second Matt's suggestion (and the others) that your ex get a paternity test at some point soon.
Navigating change is the hard part, Mighty. The way to deal with it is to keep your balance for YOU. That's the real "rule" of DB. That and learn to listen before you act. Just so you know
AJ
P.S. I'm dying to know what the deal was with the dress. I almost couldn't read from the tears in my eyes at the way you described that. You have a great way of telling a story. Kind of like Heather in that regard.
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
Mighty- I've just recently started reading your threads and all I can say is WOW! You really have weathered a crazy hurricane and now it seems XH is getting a clue? Whatever happens you are in the drivers seat it appears. And how wonderful that S17 is interacting with him. I can see from all of your posts what a great, caring mom you are and I know how awful it is to see our kids hurting. I hope they transition through all of this without too much craziness.
Rooting for you!
Me 41 H 40 M 20 T 23 S 19,16, 8 D 13 BD1 dec 2012 not sure going to work BD2 sep 2013 seeking a D Filed oct 2013, D Feb 2015 Life is about daring greatly, about being in the arena- Brene Brown
Hey Matt. Yup, you got it- this chick is CLULESS! I mean, like so into her own world of her & her son it is unbelievable. Look, it's her world & we are all living in it.
And. Auuuuuuuuh, yeah - there will be a test. I have no doubt. I know he's thought it all along, but I also know that he was too afraid to tell her. Wtf? Who was that guy. Well, quite frankly, the guy I know has been showing up frequently the past couple weeks. And, that guy isn't afraid.
AJ, good call on many things. First- yup I need serious help w stfu. I have been fine keeping it under control w no contact. Slightly better w conversations, but to just be a listening ear- that's kind of new to me. It's embarrassing to admit that. But I can't fix what I don't acknowledge.
The kids.... I am thinking some family counseling should be in the works. Something's gotta give. My main focus is to stay on top of this. And I am feeling much healthier these days. I know, I've had some moments, but it's me. I like to think it's ok to be authentic to me, but just a better, revised version.
Quote:
You have a great way of telling a story. Kind of like Heather in that regard.
Whoa!^^^^^^ wow! I am VERY flattered.
And yeah, the dress. OMG..... I don't even know. I've got nothin.
So, I'm wide awake. I can't sleep. I think my adrenaline is still pumping. I wish I could share my story...
Let me be clear. No one was hurt. Not physically. But, whew, it was eventful.
Oh daring! Hey there! Thanks for checking in. Never a dull moment, that's for sure. Hope you are well.
Go Mighty Go !Just caught up on your posts - a whole new thread started!
I am so happy for you. You are truly having a life changing journey. Congrats for staying in control of what you want - just don't let all these changes take over - keep that control.
Laughed so much about the dress - the image will remain with me :o)
Let me make this very clear to you. If u ever step foot on our property again, the police will be called and charges will be pressed.
It was sent from xh phone. 5 min later xh sent, "that was from [fugly HWW]."
OMG.... Seriously. This chick is so clueless. Before we go any further... I get it and it won't happen again.
But OMG, she wants to make thing clear to me?! Is she joking?
And
"Our property"
This got me going this morning, I'm afraid to admit. No more. She's getting hers & it's just the beginning for her.
I left work early. D13 is really sick. When I got home xh was out front of bil's house next door. They were unloading more stuff. He had made another trip, but now hasn't come back & no word outside of text this morning. It really ticked me off. He is such a puppet & she is the puppet master.
I just want her to tell me herself. Why does he need to send her communication? C'mon! It gets me on so many levels. I'm calmed down now, but dang!
I know, don't give her the power. Ok, over it. I can find satisfaction knowing that I'm in HER head.
LOL. So the hww is fighting you to keep her new man? Has Jerry Springer been notified that somebody who should not even be in the picture is letting you know her boundaries, even though you want nothing to do with either of them?
Give it all the attention it deserves - none. It'll go away in short order.
AJ
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
