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Oh cadet... After reading MLC for dummies I'm sure H is in the depths of a full blown mlc but there was a link to a thread on another older post for mlc vs was. Do you still have it? Just would like to read more about that. Thanks!


M:32 H: 40
D1: 3
D2: 9 months old
Bomb dropped: 2/4/14 (I was 7 month preg)
Moved out: 11/15/14
OW confirmed and supposedly dumped 1/15
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Originally Posted By: BBlove
Oh cadet... After reading MLC for dummies I'm sure H is in the depths of a full blown mlc but there was a link to a thread on another older post for mlc vs was. Do you still have it? Just would like to read more about that. Thanks!


No I am sorry it was Purged.

Bottom line YOU do nothing different in either case.
Your advice is the same.

Was this a sudden change in behavior or has it been going on for a long time?


Me-70, D37,S36
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Hi BBlove,

So sorry you find yourself here as well. Just wanted to say hello and let you know you have lots of support. Hang in there.


M:25 years at BD w/ 2 daughters
BD: 5/14
Separated 6/14 - H moved cross country w/OW
D Final 9/17

“I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.”
― Maya Angelou



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job Offline
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BBLove,

I have posted the Midlife Crisis for Dummies for you as a separate thread.

Last edited by job; 11/28/14 01:51 PM.
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Cadet... It was pretty abrupt. I kept saying why won't you even consider trying to work on this (before I for DB and what MLC really was). I was so confused. How could it have gone from "yes things are great in this moment between us but nothing some communication and reconnecting couldn't fix" to "ilybnilwy and we will never be able to work out". Literally a bomb! I was left so confused shuffling through the last year trying to understand what and how.


M:32 H: 40
D1: 3
D2: 9 months old
Bomb dropped: 2/4/14 (I was 7 month preg)
Moved out: 11/15/14
OW confirmed and supposedly dumped 1/15
Joined: Mar 2014
Posts: 33
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BBlove Offline OP
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Reading and reading and reading... It helps! A lot!

So is his emotional presence for our daughter a show, an attempt to be genuine, obligatory? Surely it isn't the one realm of his life he can feel? He's always been a person of integrity and overly responsible. I feel this is the case of guiltily responsible I don't think he doesn't want what's best for our girls but I also feel like he's just going through the motions. He good at it though but I suppose it's a mask/facade he's portrayed his whole life. Why wouldn't he be good at it right!


M:32 H: 40
D1: 3
D2: 9 months old
Bomb dropped: 2/4/14 (I was 7 month preg)
Moved out: 11/15/14
OW confirmed and supposedly dumped 1/15
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 13,533
Likes: 78
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Originally Posted By: job
BBLove,

I have posted the Midlife Crisis for Dummies for you as a separate thread.

Job I think you misunderstood.

Bb was looking for the thread on MLC vs WAS


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Originally Posted By: BBlove
Cadet... It was pretty abrupt. I kept saying why won't you even consider trying to work on this (before I for DB and what MLC really was). I was so confused. How could it have gone from "yes things are great in this moment between us but nothing some communication and reconnecting couldn't fix" to "ilybnilwy and we will never be able to work out". Literally a bomb! I was left so confused shuffling through the last year trying to understand what and how.

This does sound like MLC to me.
although it's not for me to decide


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job Offline
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Hey Cadet,
Yep, I misunderstood what BB was looking for...but at least we have a new thread on Dummies (once again). LOL! Sorry about that.


Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
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BB,
If you do a search on the net you'll find some articles on MLC vs WAS..but you'll need to type midlife crisis vs. walk away spouse. The articles are not what we had posted here, but it will be a good reference tool for you.


Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
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